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[Paphi]

West! Go west! It rhymes with best! Grab an ally* and go!

[lawastooshort]

Nigel performs a ballad telling of his rock-crushing misfortune with the aim of Inspiring Competence in his audience.

[LordBrassroast]

Respawn. Track down the banjo dude and kill him.

[ATHATH]

Keep in mind that I post on my phone, so all I see for the abilities is the name of the ability in brackets.

Possess the statue, and inspect its abilities. Walk through the Eastern door.

Can't someone just respawn at the end of the dungeon? "The fallen can respawn at a [Statue of Life] of their choice."

[Elephant Parade]

Jeff respawned with minor PTSD, forever scared of falling objects.

[1] Jeff learned nothing from his experience.

Respawn, cursing my luck. seriously, how did I roll a zero, of all things?

Aralak uses the power of unlife to—wait, no, the statue brought him back.

Ask Jim to give me my loot now.

[4] Jim reluctantly complies. The corpses are unceremoniously dumped on the floor.

West! Go west! It rhymes with best! Grab an ally* and go!

Follow the door leading West.

Throw a coin experimentally through Steve.

[6][1] Phil tries to grab an ally with his left hand, but he forgets to take off his shield; his "ally" is bashed in the head. Ow. The coin drops to the floor.

Nigel performs a ballad telling of his rock-crushing misfortune with the aim of Inspiring Competence in his audience.

Nigel respawns. He still has his banjo, somehow.

[1] Nigel performs the same horrible death-metal cover. This time, he screeches about rocks while doing so. People are starting to call him "Deaf Nigel".

Respawn. Track down the banjo dude and kill him.

[3] Sylvarris punches the banjo man. Though Nigel was unarguably harmed, Sylvarris was likely hurt more; he had to get within punching distance of the death metal cover. He now has [Bleeding Ears].

Possess the statue, and inspect its abilities. Walk through the Eastern door.

[5] Steve possesses the statue. Unfortunately, upon trying to walk east, he finds that it's built into the floor. Dang.

According to the statue's statblock, it has [Revive] and [Sacred Air].


The statue room is unchanged, other than the corpses littering the floor—those of a goblin shaman, a goblin archer, and a goblin swordsman. The goblin trainee escaped, if you forgot.
    The south door leads to the collapsed room. The east and west doors haven't been used, somehow.

Spoiler: Heroes (click to show/hide)

Coolrune206 / Jeff the Blessed: Fine  / [Super Luck]
Paphi / Phil the Angry: Fine / [Orthnalof], Driftwood Shield
blazing glory / Joe the Foolish: Fine / [Jim]
lawastooshort / Blind Nigel: Fine / [Banjo]
LordBrassroast / Sylvarris the Elf: [Bleeding Ears] / Lv. 1 Ranger
Dustan Hache / Aralak Darkstone: Fine / Lv. 1 Necromancer / [Heal Wound] [Animate Bones]
The Moonlit Shadow / Kies the Shady: Bruised / [Legendary Reverse Energy Kopesh]
ATHATH / Steve the Ghost: Possessing / [Incorporeal Body] / [Possess]
    Statue of Life: Possessed Object / [Revive] / [Sacred Air]

Spoiler: gm replies (click to show/hide)

Can't someone just respawn at the end of the dungeon? "The fallen can respawn at a [Statue of Life] of their choice."

but

but they don't know where the statues even are

you can't choose something you don't know about

[Coolrune206]

Set off to the East, ready for any kind of combat.

[Whisperling]

I am Alexander, a madman with psionic powers.

Spawn, and be annoyed at the guy currently ruining the reputation of proper bards. Maybe telekinetically crush his banjo, if I'm feeling particularly lucky.

[Dustan Hache]

Attempt to reanimate the corpses just dropped on the ground using Reanimate Bones, AFTER people have taken their share of loot.

[Paphi]

Ha! Perhaps shield not so flimsy! Or maybe wizardman just flimsier. Why am I not west!

[blazing glory]

Loot all the corpse, go east, use the unlucky guy as a shield against any nasties on the other side.

[lawastooshort]

Go and smell some of that sacred air. Defend my banjo with extreme prejudice or whatever the phrase is since it doesn't look right now I've written it.

[LordBrassroast]

Shoot the banjo man. From far away.

[palu]

I am Bob the Illusionist, and I have Illusions (duh)

I create an illusionary double of myself

[ATHATH]

Chisel the statue off of its pedestal, loot the shaman, and head East. Break through the Eastern wall Kool-Aid Man style if I can't fit through the door.

Also, EP, thanks for the pm.

[Elephant Parade]

Set off to the East, ready for any kind of combat.

[3+1] Jeff walks through the door, except he rolled a 3 so he stumbles slightly or something he avoids this minor inconvenience with his amazing luck.

Most of the room is filled with water. There's a small platform outside the door, though, obviously; furthermore, there's a small stone "island" on the far side. It's a pretty long room, though—it'd be a bit of a swim to get across. It might be worth the swim, though: you can make out a shape on that item, and it seems to be glowing...

I am Alexander, a madman with psionic powers.

Spawn, and be annoyed at the guy currently ruining the reputation of proper bards. Maybe telekinetically crush his banjo, if I'm feeling particularly lucky.

Alexander the Out-of-Place is [Insane], which sucks, but having a [Mind Blast] almost makes up for it. Having [Telekinesis] definitely makes up for it.

[4] Alexander uses telekinesis to twist Deaf Nigel's banjo out of shape. That's mean, but not really crazy; he's hardly living up to his passives.

Ha! Perhaps shield not so flimsy! Or maybe wizardman just flimsier. Why am I not west!

[3] the stumbles are real

Phil has stumbled into a goblin guardpost! Worse, the goblins were ready for him! With a quick glance at his surroundings, he spots two goblin swordsmen, a goblin shaman, and—grr!—that escaped goblin trainee! The shaman is behind some fortifications.

The goblins attack!
[5] The first swordsman leaps forward and aims a stab at Phil's chest. It's a hit! Phil is seriously wounded!
[1] The second swordsman trips over his oversized boots.
The shaman waits.
[4] The trainee throws a rock. It hits Phil in the head, and it definitely hurts, but it isn't much next to the chest wound.

Loot all the corpse, go east, use the unlucky guy as a shield against any nasties on the other side.

[3] Joe grabs a sword—after he picks it up, he realizes that it's pretty rusty—as he sprints to the next room. Swinging open the door, he nearly knocks Jeff into the pond, but that doesn't happen.

Go and smell some of that sacred air. Defend my banjo with extreme prejudice or whatever the phrase is since it doesn't look right now I've written it.

[3] It's kind of hard to defend one's banjo from an invisible force, but Nigel definitely tries! He doesn't save it, exactly, but it's not totally destroyed, so it's a partial victory!

Also, sacred air doesn't really smell like anything.

If the guy gets close to me again, slice his hand off. Go East!

[6] You barrel through the door. Expecting the other side to be, y'know, another room, you don't slow down; you end up falling in the water. Bluh.

Shoot the banjo man. From far away.

[1] You poke your eye out with the arrow, somehow. You are now [Wincing].

I am Bob the Illusionist, and I have Illusions (duh)

I create an illusionary double of myself

Bob is an [Illusionist]. He knows how to create an [Illusion].

[3] Bob creates an illusionary double of himself, but wait! That act was, in itself, an illusion! He was fooling himself all along!

Chisel the statue off of its pedestal, loot the shaman, and head East. Break through the Eastern wall Kool-Aid Man style if I can't fit through the door.

[3] Steve tries to get the statue to chisel itself off of its statue, but its arms are stuck in the "praying" pose.

Attempt to reanimate the corpses just dropped on the ground using Reanimate Bones, AFTER people have taken their share of loot.

[1] Aralak flubs his ritual. The necromantic backlash causes the flesh of his [4] left leg to melt off, down to the bone. He can still move the bone around, though, so it's not the end of the world. Still, he definitely has a [Bad Leg]

Spoiler: Heroes (click to show/hide)

Coolrune206 / Jeff the Blessed: Fine  / [Super Luck]
Paphi / Phil the Angry: Seriously Wounded / [Orthnalof], Driftwood Shield
blazing glory / Joe the Foolish: Fine / [Jim] / Rusty sword
lawastooshort / Blind Nigel: Fine / [Broken Banjo]
LordBrassroast / Sylvarris the Elf: [Bleeding Ears][Wincing] / Lv. 1 Ranger
Dustan Hache / Aralak Darkstone: [Bad Leg] / Lv. 1 Necromancer / [Heal Wound][Animate Bones]
The Moonlit Shadow / Kies the Shady: Bruised / [Legendary Reverse Energy Kopesh]
ATHATH / Steve the Ghost: Possessing / [Incorporeal Body] / [Possess]
    Statue of Life: Possessed Object / [Revive] / [Sacred Air]
Whisperling / Alexander the Out-Of-Place: [Insane] / [Mind Blast] [Telekinesis]
palu / Bob the Illusionist: Lv. 1 Illusionist / [Illusion]