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[Staalo]

Hey, is this a contest? I don't have much to brag about, except my old failed War Minotaur breeding program. Even that was (ever so slightly) modded.

In other news, a recent migration wave brought in two very interesting migrants: master woodcrafter Nomal Hotsalve and her daughter Urist Honesthall who is seven years old. Little Urist doesn't have a father listed in her unit description nor in the Legends; from all the evidence I simply have to conclude she never had one. Also her mother seems to be unmarried.

Do I have a dwarven messiah in my fortress?

[Pirate Bob]

I just bought a male and female cavy after reading a thread about live animal minecart shotguns. goblin wont know what hit em till its head gets caved in by a spinning cavy boar

I don't understand - wouldn't you want to use really large animals?  The speed of an item launched from a minecart shotgun is independent of its size, so I would assume that would mean that larger animals would do more damage.  I suppose that large animals would also have a larger contact area (probably?) and that might mitigate damage somewhat? 

To put this differently, a water boulder (which is very large) launched at maximum minecart speed renders whatever part it strikes into pulp, and even steel armor does nothing to stop this.  It seems unlikely that more damage is possible, unless you instead use edged weapons or trap components, which can slice invaders into tiny pieces.

If this is just for the lols, why not use something dangerous (even dogs) and which is not a grazer?  Or is there an advantage to the launched animals being starved to death?  I feel like I am missing something here...

Edit - if you're just going for maximum number of animals from fast breeding, I suggest turkeys (or pretty much any egg-laying birds).  One turkey lays 10-14 eggs, and they mature in 1 year.  Just make sure you put your turkey breeding farm behind locked doors, as otherwise dwarves will eat all the eggs.

[Dozebôm Lolumzalìs]

I have some dwarves with, apparently, no parents.  I think that there might be some problems with the "Everybody's Historical!" thing I've been hearing about.

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From the Journal of Zasit Zuglarildom, Miner:

Opal 26th, 126:

While mining out some exploratory tunnels to find ores and the next caverns (because I'm sure, if we don't now, it'll be when there ten giant cave spiders and five forgotten beasts right next to the breach), the miners found some warm obsidian.  Literally fifteen levels below-ground.

What.

There is a cavern on level five, too.  What's up with this embark?  Everything's at the top!  It says "96" at the bottom, so it's not because there's no room for it below.

Goden has this look in her eyes that indicates she wants to utilize it.  Oh, dear.  At least the soap maker'll be happy he doesn't have to burn tons of wood into charcoal anymore.

I told her, I didn't want to die in magma, despite that being one of the most honored ways to die.  Armok's blood!  I still have almost a hundred years left in me.

Nil says he had to drink vomit.  What?  I told him we had plenty of water.  It's not as bad as I thought it would be.  I can't wait to get back to alcohol, though.

Goden is meeting with the mechanic to try and figure out how to breach the magma pipe safely.  We don't know if the top is open to a cavern, so we'll breach it from the side.  By allowing it to fall into a pit that Nil and I WON'T be in, we should be able to get out of the way in time.

The soap maker's made some soap.  It's worth about 25 coin, since it's a big lump.  The chief medical dwarf immediately seized the whole thing for the hospital, and won't let any of us use it.  The butcher, particularly, would like to clean some of the blood off him.

[TheFlame52]

An FB made of vomit showed up in the third cavern, my doctors are grinding diagnosing skill off two hell workers in traction, I'm slaughtering some of my training animals now that my dwarves are expert trainers of them, a magma crab gave birth to twins, I'm running out of blocks for the Hell Bastion, and I'm now up to 4000 deceased units.

[Mimidormi]

"Mountainhome's crazy with the shortage of earrings and legwear. Folks willing to pay almost twice as much for them. Real killing to be made there, I tell you. What else we sorely lack... Oh! Scratch that, we need powder the most."
"Powder?"
"Yeah, you know... powder."
"Ohhhhh, right, powder. Say no more."



Powder.

(Playing vanilla 40.24. This looks very similar to the ever-suspicious 'barrel of liquid [10]' bug.)

[nickbii]

Powder is technically a valid material type:
http://dwarffortresswiki.org/index.php/DF2014:Powder

So you'll get double price for sand, flour, sugar, and plaster.

But that is a funny way for the game to say it.

[Spehss _]

Embarked on the sinister volcano "The Gory Axe". The fort is named "Ringscars". Probably will be fitting. Especially considering this sinister volcano is populated by scabby undead. And I'm digging into the sinister side. There may be reanimation. This will be fun.

Shortly after embarking, the wagon has been set upon by an undead peregrin falcon corpse, which sent the pack animals running. The two hammerdwarves barely had time to get their gear. Sarvesh Praiseboards is keeping the flying horror at bay while his comrade and commander Nil Gearedsoldier is just standing aside and watching. The two war dogs are lying on the ground terrified.

Sarvesh bashed a wing off the falcon corpse with his hammer while a farmer ran in and started punching it, punching a leg off. The wing was nothing but bones and the leg stump is spewing undead peregrine falcon blood. The thing remains flying. It manages to get some good bites on the farmer and knocks him unconscious before shaking him around by the head a bunch. The wagon is now covered in blood. Finally, Sarvesh lands a fine hit with his war hammer, pulps the falcon's head, and knocks the corpse out of the sky, landing 5 tiles away.

The only farmer is unconscious and badly injured, with a broken leg, torn open head, and various cuts and bruises. We have no medical supplies, soap, or water. And there may be reanimation. And if the farmer dies and reanimates things could go bad quickly.

SMELLS LIKE DORF FORTRESS

EDIT: Well that went to hell fast. A wombat corpse zoomed out of nowhere and attacked the wagon. The 2 soldiers, the farmer, and the woodcutter all got in the fight, as well as a stray dog which was braver than the 2 war dogs we embarked with. The wombat, being a little furry ball of meat, and being undead and filled with rage, was tanking every attack the hammerdwarves threw at it. Eventually all the combats collapsed to accumulated wounds and exhaustion and the wombat gnawed them all to death. Then the slain dwarves reanimated and eventually only the miners were left, who got overrun and killed in the tunnels they were digging.

My fledgling fort was ruined by a single undead wombat.

[Dwarf4Explosives]

Even normal wombats are fierce. Okay, not fierce as in aggressive, but in real life they manage to tank trailer trucks.

[Spehss _]

My second attempt at colonizing the Gory Axe is proving more successful. After savescumming for a fresh start, I came with two fully armored military dwarves, clad in copper and armed with copper polehammers. The polehammers I modded in are proving excellent anti-undead weapons. Due to the high velocity swings, low contact area, and large size, the attacks are quite good at pulping, or at least knocking smaller undead away with the force of the blow. This is all balanced because it's a two-handed weapon and dorfs won't be able to use shields.

The only undead to accost the embark at the start was a pack of chinchilla corpses, which the militia and dogs handled easily. One of the dogs even got some kills. By the time the undead combat wombat juggernaut rolled around, the dwarves were safely holed away in the mountainside.

In addition to undead wildlife, the Gory Axe regularly gets rains of ooze. This ooze is blood red and causes intense blistering on everything it touches.

Fun. Looks like I'll have an interesting fort.

[Antsan]

A titan has come to visit "Minemazes".

The Brush Titan Hode Sanaethra Edethnifih Nubpo has come! A towering three-eyed serpent. It has a spiral shell and emanates an aura of giving and kindness. Its chartreuse scales are blocky and close-set.

Hm, I didn't see any thoughts of giving or kindness in the soldiers involved in killing the thing.

[Iamblichos]

Seriously random artifact description... although I would totally read that book.

[TheFlame52]

I got an artifact with a picture of a dwarf who did literally nothing on it. Lame.

The merchants came and I traded them 17 million in prepared meals and old clothes for all their low-quality iron and steel goods.

[endlessblaze]

I got angry at my mayor. he wont obey borrow so I cant drop him into my pit 

[TheFlame52]

Put him in a squad and station him on the bridge.

[endlessblaze]

tried.....well I actually tried making him attack the dwarves merchants but same difference.