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[GrizzlyAdamz]

I wish for a B.O.A.T.

Is this from a game or something?

Granted, it requires 10% fewer resources.

I wish that me previous post had been correctly interpreted as a non-post and so resulted in the previous poster's wish being granted.

I have hereby officially won this thread- since it takes 10% fewer resources, the body doesn't need to store as much energy in the cells, and the cells shrink to accommodate.
My wish went through uncorrupted, SUCCESS!

Also: we're already operating on limited resources, a limited amount of infinite resource might solve problems if our race is suitably grown-up.

Granted. You get a set of Adamantine teeth

heavy as Thor's hammer.

dat constipation.

[Remuthra]

Granted, you get a Boring Oration Arranged by a Treehugger.

I wish for a machine that can generate perfect sandwiches to be immediately accessible by me.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted, you get a Boring Oration Arranged by a Treehugger.

I wish for a machine that can generate perfect sandwiches to be immediately accessible by me.

Granted, but it comes into existence in the space your head used to occupy. As in you're dead, and everyone else gets to eat the pile of perfect sandwiches around your body. Also: the sandwiches can't be eaten fast enough and the world is suffocated by them.

I wish for more wishes.

[RAM]

Congratulations, you have won the wish lottery! You get the following bonus wishes:
To be hated by everyone.
To be able to feel everyone's hatred.
To fail at everything that you try to do.
To have all your past accomplishments come to futile ends.
Enjoy your prizes!

I wish to be the the patron god of accurate spelling.


P.S.

Granted, it requires 10% fewer resources.

I wish that me previous post had been correctly interpreted as a non-post and so resulted in the previous poster's wish being granted.

I have hereby officially won this thread- since it takes 10% fewer resources, the body doesn't need to store as much energy in the cells, and the cells shrink to accommodate.
My wish went through uncorrupted, SUCCESS!

Also: we're already operating on limited resources, a limited amount of infinite resource might solve problems if our race is suitably grown-up.

1: you fail the tread, due to not granting or wishing for anything.
2: Life doesn't work like that, your cells expand because they can. Throw in a few hundred generations and maybe your cellular activity might adjust for it...
3: Our race is a very very very long way away from being that grown up.
4: 'Better' is a long way from 'good enough'...
5: Given that your biological processes now produce massive excess energy relative to available food, you must have food specifically synthesised, exercise constantly, or become morbidly obese to the point that it kills you.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted. Unfortunately your jurisdiction only covers Klingon.

I wish that the wish lottery retroactively had better prizes.


1. Failing and winning are not mutually exclusive with the presence of time.
2. I'm talking about (specific) adipose tissue whose size does, in fact, depend on your body's ability to metabolize it's contents. Also: wishes make everything possible.
3/4. True enough, but I tried.
5. Good try, but you said requires less, not produces more. Unless there's double-jeopardy, I'm home free. (also, definition of chemical energy is fun)

[Remuthra]

Granted. Now the prizes affect everyone else.

I wish to be omniscient, with the omniscience controllable by my conscious wish.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted. Before you even fully realize what you've done, you decide you don't want it anymore, and you forget everything in that very same instant.

I wish all the executives on the board of Wish Lottery Inc. were fired, frozen in carbonite, and dropped into a black hole.
-edit
stockholders too.

[javierpwn]

Granted.However, an identity thief gets hired under your name; and you get the aforementioned actions done to you.

I wish Pokémon had only 150 pokemans; like the good old days

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted. Half of them are unowns, the others are the scum of the proverbial pokemon trashbin.

I wish I was really lucky for the rest of my natural life.

ninja'ing: Btw If I'm going to die so soon, it better be in a really lucky way.

-edit

Granted.However, an identity thief gets hired under your name; and you get the aforementioned actions done to you.

worth it

You are extremely lucky for your natural life. A split second before your wish is granted, you suffer a failure of all organs. The doctors replace your body with a new one. You are now artificially alive.

Welp, I come out of the equation with a life-saving operation that gives me a new robot body and a new lease on life. Sweet.

[Remuthra]

You are extremely lucky for your natural life. A split second before your wish is granted, you suffer a failure of all organs. The doctors replace your body with a new one. You are now artificially alive.

I wish RtD was done with a d8 instead.

[Scoops Novel]

*unsure as to what RtD is*

I wish that you help me, and my goals, to the best of your ability, which includes dechipering my goals, after i tel you i have finished staing my goals, which are as follows:

*generic help the world etc etc etc*

I have finished stating my goals.

[RAM]

RtD
Nobody can think of anything good for the two new options, so they end up being "nothing happens" and only serve to make the games slower...

You goals are to compete with those around you and to gather status and possessions. The status and possessions require ever growing maintenance that eventually paralyses your progress. Continually competing with others erodes your mental resources and leaves you desperate. Enjoy...

The eugenics program is a great success, genetic deficiencies are at an all-time low! It has been so successful, in fact, that we are upgrading it to purge all inferior life. Cattle, Grain, yeast, all life must be purged if it does not meet our strict standards!

I wish for a back-stage pass to where they keep the crashed space-aliens.

[pisskop]

Granted.  The government injects you with alien DNA, causing a deep burning sensation but nothing else.  You are quarentined indefinately.

I wish for ketchup with my french fries.

[timferius]

Granted.  The government injects you with alien DNA, causing a deep burning sensation but nothing else.  You are quarentined indefinately.

I wish for ketchup with my french fries.

Granted, however it is not Heinz ketchup, and is therefore sub-par.

I wish for frozen yogurt.

[Hubris Incalculable]

Granted.  The government injects you with alien DNA, causing a deep burning sensation but nothing else.  You are quarentined indefinately.

I wish for ketchup with my french fries.

Granted, however it is not Heinz ketchup, and is therefore sub-par.

I wish for frozen yogurt.

Granted. You get a 40 kilo block of frozen-solid plain yoghurt. Now what?

I wish for a better nose.

Also, there is nothing wrong with other brands than Heinz. I personally find Heinz too sweet.