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How highly would you rate the leadership of your Mission Group?

Very highly, perfect commander, fearless and dedicated to The Computer above all else.
Highly, strong-willed and brave, role model
Average: no outstanding traits
Lowly: shirks duty, afraid of battle
Treasonous: cowardly conduct, suspicious actions, unwillingness to pursue leads on commie scum. Should be executed.

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Author Topic: Re: PARANOIA [dead] - In which the party is on indefinite hiatus  (Read 23248 times)

IcyTea31

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters their equipment
« Reply #150 on: February 03, 2015, 11:30:19 pm »

"Joe-R, I knew something was up with you! Friend Computer, Joe-R-NEY-1 just practically confessed secret society membership. How should I deal with this treason?"

Ga-R aims his pistol at Joe-R. He fires if Joe-R tries to reach for anything.

Only after the situation has been dealt with, I don't have some time skip power:

"Wei-R, why are you trying to carry a drum large anough to require your both hands and then some more boxes? Do you have some mutant power to do that or something? And Crock-R, are you seriously trying to lift a tank?"

Ga-R grabs the saxophone, then opens the drum and uses the petroleum jelly to grease the instrument's valves.
Logged
There is a world yet only seen by physicists and magicians.

zomara0292

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters their equipment
« Reply #151 on: February 04, 2015, 12:18:00 am »

"No. you put the drum under the biggest box, under the big box, under the smallest box, silly. Also, why are you rubbing the food on the instrument? Your not planning on eating that while you let the traitor escape, are you? Because that means you're not doing the job my computer pal gave you. And, if you don't do that, you're a traitor too. You have to make sure the traitor is dead. As the song goes: 'Shoot the leg, make him beg. Shoot the head, make him dead.'"
Logged
I hear a piranha is good eating.  I have a spear; I'll be fine!
The Pilot and their cargo handlers paused when they saw that the entire camp is covered in eldritch runes coated in blood. And rotting monkey corpses everywhere..

They decide that they didn't get paid enough for this..

VoidSlayer

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters their equipment
« Reply #152 on: February 04, 2015, 03:45:03 am »

Joe-R

"Good advise!"

Shoot Ga-R in the head with my laser pistol.  Try and dodge the 3 or whatever laser blasts too.  Duck and roll perhaps?

Kassire

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters their equipment
« Reply #153 on: February 04, 2015, 05:25:11 pm »

Teddy-R
Open fire on the treasonous scum Joe-R
Logged
All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well

NAV

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters their equipment
« Reply #154 on: February 04, 2015, 05:29:32 pm »

Crock-R
Equip the tank + dispenser, which I assume is some sort of flamethrower-type weapon.


I will use it to shoot Joe-r next turn if he somehow survives all the laser blasts.
Logged
Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.

zomara0292

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters their equipment
« Reply #155 on: February 04, 2015, 11:35:33 pm »

Wei-R
Wiselu scramble to dodge the oncoming laser fire.
Logged
I hear a piranha is good eating.  I have a spear; I'll be fine!
The Pilot and their cargo handlers paused when they saw that the entire camp is covered in eldritch runes coated in blood. And rotting monkey corpses everywhere..

They decide that they didn't get paid enough for this..

Dorsidwarf

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #156 on: February 05, 2015, 01:56:29 am »

In Which The Party Discovers The Joy Of Lasers
Teddy-R
"S-secret society? My good s-sir, that is t-treason! You have f-failed your good friend C-computer!"
Draw my laser pistol and point it at Joe-R
"Joe-R, I knew something was up with you! Friend Computer, Joe-R-NEY-1 just practically confessed secret society membership. How should I deal with this treason?"

Ga-R aims his pistol at Joe-R. He fires if Joe-R tries to reach for anything.

Only after the situation has been dealt with, I don't have some time skip power:

"Wei-R, why are you trying to carry a drum large anough to require your both hands and then some more boxes? Do you have some mutant power to do that or something? And Crock-R, are you seriously trying to lift a tank?"

Ga-R grabs the saxophone, then opens the drum and uses the petroleum jelly to grease the instrument's valves.
Joe-R

"Good advise!"

Shoot Ga-R in the head with my laser pistol.  Try and dodge the 3 or whatever laser blasts too.  Duck and roll perhaps?
Teddy-R
Open fire on the treasonous scum Joe-R

Quote from: Game Master's Rare Helpfulness
Normally in Paranoia, you won't get to see the modifiers affecting your combat rolls. However, since this is the first turn of combat in the game, The Computer has generously declassified some dice rolls and modifiers for the first few shots.


Seizing the element of audacity, Joe-R fires his laser pistol at Ga-R. [+1 due to expecting it, HIT]. [Damage roll: L8-L4= 4. Roll of 6, No Injury result.] The shot glances off his shoulder pad, and Joe dives for cover as people open fire. First is Ga-R, who takes affront to being in a Turk-Y shoot, and plugs him [-4] in the chest. The laser pistol glances off a shiny button [1 to damage roll L4], and he curses.
Teddy-R opens up screaming "YOU SCUMMY TREASONOUS TREASON SCUM", and zaps him in the arm, the flesh burning and smouldering. That's gonna leave a helluva mark. 
The guard fires at a wall with his rifle, confused by the dull reflections of people around him, and catches the chirpy chronobot on the rebound, making it whir and beep.

Wellis-R
Take some marbles and a laser rifle.
You shove some pretty glass objects into your pockets, and arm yourself with the big rifle. You recall how these things are designed to kill, rather than injure like laser pistols.
Wei-R
Take all three boxes, pocket some marbles too, and take the petroleum jelly.

Do I even know what jelly is? I am sure its food. Sounds like food.
You haul the crates onto your back with a fit of herculean strength, feeling something crunch, but are dissuaded from picking up the fifty-gallon barrel of jelly (You have heard rumours that jelly is an ancient Outdoors technology that makes things shake)
A laser rifle shot sends the chronobot beeping and tumbling past your head, where it ticks on the ground saying things like "'DOESN'T TIME FLY,' 'THE HORSE SAYS', 'ESTIMATED TIME TO COMPLETION THREE YEARCYCLES'

Crock-R
Equip the tank + dispenser, which I assume is some sort of flamethrower-type weapon.


I will use it to shoot Joe-r next turn if he somehow survives all the laser blasts.
You put the tank on like a backpack, and heft the nozzle. Fresh-baked traitor, comin' right up.
Logged
Quote from: Rodney Ootkins
Everything is going to be alright

VoidSlayer

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #157 on: February 05, 2015, 02:16:25 am »

Joe-R

Drop the laser pistol fall to the ground clutching my head and scream at the Int-sec Guard,
"Get out of my head!"

IcyTea31

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #158 on: February 05, 2015, 02:58:13 am »

Ga-R holsters his pistol, kicks Joe-R's pistol away and pins him down, then starts violently beating him. He screams upwards: "FRIEND COMPUTER! I have this dirty traitor at my mercy! Permission to execute?!
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Pencil_Art

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #159 on: February 05, 2015, 03:27:37 am »

Wellis-R aims the rifle at Joe-R, and opens fire if he tries anything funny. He is careful not to hit Ga-R if he does so.
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NAV

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #160 on: February 05, 2015, 11:08:29 am »

Crock-R aims his thrower at Joe-R, but he doesn't shoot because there is a teammate in the way. If for any reason, the teammate becomes not in the way, then he shoots Joe-R
Logged
Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.

Dorsidwarf

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #161 on: February 05, 2015, 01:10:31 pm »

Joe-R

Drop the laser pistol fall to the ground clutching my head and scream at the Int-sec Guard,
"Get out of my head!"
Wellis-R aims the rifle at Joe-R, and opens fire if he tries anything funny. He is careful not to hit Ga-R if he does so.
Crock-R aims his thrower at Joe-R, but he doesn't shoot because there is a teammate in the way. If for any reason, the teammate becomes not in the way, then he shoots Joe-R
Ga-R holsters his pistol, kicks Joe-R's pistol away and pins him down, then starts violently beating him. He screams upwards: "FRIEND COMPUTER! I have this dirty traitor at my mercy! Permission to execute?!
As the Troubleshooters leap on the screaming Joe-R, Crock-R menacing the vicinity with a tank of something or other, and a shell-chocked IntSec guard wishing he'd gotten any other mission for his first assignment, a clear, calm, clipped voice fizzles into being over your comunits., an eye appearing on all the screens. The guard leaps up and stands to attention.
Membership in a secret society is treason, Citizen, barring exceptional circumstances of dedication to Your Friend. Furthermore, you appear to be unhappy.

Being unhappy is treason.
Logged
Quote from: Rodney Ootkins
Everything is going to be alright

IcyTea31

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #162 on: February 05, 2015, 02:14:46 pm »

"I am not at all unhappy, but thank you for your concern, Friend Computer. I'm very sorry if I appear to be so. Doing my duty to Alpha Complex makes me very happy indeed."

Ga-R pulls out his pistol and executes Joe-R.
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Kassire

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #163 on: February 05, 2015, 03:37:07 pm »

Teddy-R
"D-dirty treason scum. Since w-we're done with the t-treason scum, we s-should go t-to R&D."
Take a rifle, the device, and the weird gun
Logged
All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well

IcyTea31

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Re: PARANOIA [Begun] - In which the party encounters each other
« Reply #164 on: February 05, 2015, 03:42:30 pm »

Additional action: Ga-R takes extra care to keep a visible smile on his face while going about and doing things.
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