In Which The Party Discovers The Joy Of Lasers
Teddy-R
"S-secret society? My good s-sir, that is t-treason! You have f-failed your good friend C-computer!"
Draw my laser pistol and point it at Joe-R
"Joe-R, I knew something was up with you! Friend Computer, Joe-R-NEY-1 just practically confessed secret society membership. How should I deal with this treason?"
Ga-R aims his pistol at Joe-R. He fires if Joe-R tries to reach for anything.
Only after the situation has been dealt with, I don't have some time skip power:
"Wei-R, why are you trying to carry a drum large anough to require your both hands and then some more boxes? Do you have some mutant power to do that or something? And Crock-R, are you seriously trying to lift a tank?"
Ga-R grabs the saxophone, then opens the drum and uses the petroleum jelly to grease the instrument's valves.
Joe-R
"Good advise!"
Shoot Ga-R in the head with my laser pistol. Try and dodge the 3 or whatever laser blasts too. Duck and roll perhaps?
Teddy-R
Open fire on the treasonous scum Joe-R
Normally in Paranoia, you won't get to see the modifiers affecting your combat rolls. However, since this is the first turn of combat in the game, The Computer has generously declassified some dice rolls and modifiers for the first few shots.
Seizing the element of audacity, Joe-R fires his laser pistol at Ga-R. [+1 due to expecting it, HIT]. [Damage roll: L8-L4= 4. Roll of 6, No Injury result.] The shot glances off his shoulder pad, and Joe dives for cover as people open fire. First is Ga-R, who takes affront to being in a Turk-Y shoot, and plugs him [-4] in the chest. The laser pistol glances off a shiny button [1 to damage roll L4], and he curses.
Teddy-R opens up screaming "YOU SCUMMY TREASONOUS TREASON SCUM", and zaps him in the arm, the flesh burning and smouldering. That's gonna leave a helluva mark.
The guard fires at a wall with his rifle, confused by the dull reflections of people around him, and catches the chirpy chronobot on the rebound, making it whir and beep.
Wellis-R
Take some marbles and a laser rifle.
You shove some pretty glass objects into your pockets, and arm yourself with the big rifle. You recall how these things are designed to kill, rather than injure like laser pistols.
Wei-R
Take all three boxes, pocket some marbles too, and take the petroleum jelly.
Do I even know what jelly is? I am sure its food. Sounds like food.
You haul the crates onto your back with a fit of herculean strength, feeling something crunch, but are dissuaded from picking up the fifty-gallon barrel of jelly (You have heard rumours that jelly is an ancient Outdoors technology that makes things shake)
A laser rifle shot sends the chronobot beeping and tumbling past your head, where it ticks on the ground saying things like "
'DOESN'T TIME FLY,' 'THE HORSE SAYS', 'ESTIMATED TIME TO COMPLETION THREE YEARCYCLES'Crock-R
Equip the tank + dispenser, which I assume is some sort of flamethrower-type weapon.
I will use it to shoot Joe-r next turn if he somehow survives all the laser blasts.
You put the tank on like a backpack, and heft the nozzle. Fresh-baked traitor, comin' right up.