Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: 1 ... 1127 1128 [1129] 1130 1131 ... 1342

Author Topic: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée  (Read 1549865 times)

mainiac

  • Bay Watcher
  • Na vazeal kwah-kai
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16920 on: April 26, 2016, 10:03:04 pm »

This is entertaining, but you know all this non-canon stuff you're saying is non-canon, right?

P. sure Thrawn doesn't even exist.

I dont give a shit about what JJ Abrams thinks is non canon.  He just isn't very good at world building.
Logged
Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
--------------
[CAN_INTERNET]
[PREFSTRING:google]
"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Aklyon

  • Bay Watcher
  • Fate~
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16921 on: April 26, 2016, 10:03:23 pm »

This is entertaining, but you know all this non-canon stuff you're saying is non-canon, right?

P. sure Thrawn doesn't even exist.
Canon is about as reliable as stormtroopers recently. Clearly Thrawn is still there.
Logged
Crystalline (SG)
Sigtext
Quote from: RedKing
It's known as the Oppai-Kaiju effect. The islands of Japan generate a sort anti-gravity field, which allows breasts to behave as if in microgravity. It's also what allows Godzilla and friends to become 50 stories tall, and lets ninjas run up the side of a skyscraper.

Strife26

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16922 on: April 26, 2016, 10:08:29 pm »

Star Wars is an extended metaphor for the American situation here, note.
Logged
Even the avatars expire eventually.

mainiac

  • Bay Watcher
  • Na vazeal kwah-kai
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16923 on: April 26, 2016, 10:27:16 pm »

Canon is about as reliable as stormtroopers recently.

The best shot in the empire is Finn, the janitor.
The imperial stormtroopers on Tatooine, a backwater world were good enough shots to impress Obi-wan
A legion of the emperors best troops on Endor were horrible shots but did actually succeed in shooting Leia at one point and killing a few ewoks.
The 501st on the death star never hit anything

It's obvious that the correlation runs the exact opposite direction of what you would expect.  The more elite the troops, the worse their shooting.  I think the explanation is obvious, the empire is reading the marksmanship scores backwards.  Finn probably hit every target in his marksmanship test and was graded as the worst shot in the empire at 0%.  And doesn't that say a lot about Palpatine's leadership?  He has fostered such an ineffective government that they can get the scores completely backwards and no one fixes it?
Logged
Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
--------------
[CAN_INTERNET]
[PREFSTRING:google]
"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Shadowlord

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16924 on: April 26, 2016, 10:32:28 pm »

Well, obviously Darth Plagueis reincarnated as Darth Jar Jar, who reincarnated as The (apparent) Big Bad in JJ Abrams' movies, who looks like Darth Plagueis because his apprentice Darth Sidious is very dead now so there's no further need for clever disguises. ;)

But I have no desire to read all 1522605027922533360535618378132637429718068114961380688657908494580122963258952897654000350692006139 star wars books, or even all of wookiepedia.

P.S. Episode-1 Darth Maul would have sliced everyone who wielded a lightsaber in The Force Awakens into ribbons. So would Episode-3 Obi-Wan... Lightsaber skills have really fallen far.

P.P.S. If the 501st were the troops Vader had harassing the players rescue party on the first Death Star, obviously they were ordered to miss, and to let them free the Princess, so that she would lead the Death Star straight to the rebel base.
Logged
<Dakkan> There are human laws, and then there are laws of physics. I don't bike in the city because of the second.
Dwarf Fortress Map Archive

Frumple

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Prettiest Kyuuki
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16925 on: April 26, 2016, 10:35:34 pm »

I rather imagine the notably more obvious conclusion is that the stormtrooper depictions available are generally as factual as my mother's left testicle :V

Y'do have to consider most of the available texts were written from a very one sided perspective. Fact bending here and there to make the enemy look incompetent is fairly standard as that goes...

Though SL's note on the 501st makes a lot of sense, hrm.
Logged
Ask not!
What your country can hump for you.
Ask!
What you can hump for your country.

mainiac

  • Bay Watcher
  • Na vazeal kwah-kai
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16926 on: April 26, 2016, 10:38:20 pm »

The old, Obi Wan is a cheeky bastard theory of "only imperial stormtroopers"?  I used to like it but my new explanation is even more nerdy and thus even better.

P.P.S. If the 501st were the troops Vader had harassing the players rescue party on the first Death Star, obviously they were ordered to miss, and to let them free the Princess, so that she would lead the Death Star straight to the rebel base.

But imperials who couldn't possibly have been part of such a plan were just as inaccurate.
Logged
Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
--------------
[CAN_INTERNET]
[PREFSTRING:google]
"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Aklyon

  • Bay Watcher
  • Fate~
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16927 on: April 26, 2016, 10:44:16 pm »

It couldbe general orders to look incompetent. Then they invade you and shoot accurately.
Logged
Crystalline (SG)
Sigtext
Quote from: RedKing
It's known as the Oppai-Kaiju effect. The islands of Japan generate a sort anti-gravity field, which allows breasts to behave as if in microgravity. It's also what allows Godzilla and friends to become 50 stories tall, and lets ninjas run up the side of a skyscraper.

Shadowlord

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16928 on: April 26, 2016, 10:48:07 pm »

The other common explanation is that Luke was unintentionally making them miss with THE FORCE, even though I'd tend to expect him to have needed some practice to do anything like that (and nobody else ever does, unless Vader manipulates the path of Han's blaster shots when Han shoots at him in Episode V, before pulling the blaster out of his hand).

Not mentioning The Force Awakens, of course, where you have someone who can stop blaster bolts in midair but is still shit enough at lightsabers that a non-force-user can hold his own against him for a couple minutes (seeing as that's all action-y and I wasn't looking at the time, my time estimate could be wildly wrong).
Logged
<Dakkan> There are human laws, and then there are laws of physics. I don't bike in the city because of the second.
Dwarf Fortress Map Archive

mainiac

  • Bay Watcher
  • Na vazeal kwah-kai
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16929 on: April 26, 2016, 10:54:09 pm »

Does anyone want to do a vice president prediction contest?  I'm not sure what the rules would be like.
Logged
Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
--------------
[CAN_INTERNET]
[PREFSTRING:google]
"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

TheDarkStar

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16930 on: April 26, 2016, 11:01:31 pm »

Does anyone want to do a vice president prediction contest?  I'm not sure what the rules would be like.

1. Vice president predictions must be human (no, eldritch horrors do not count) and eligible for the office (so no predicting that a 2-year-old will be the VP).
2. 10 points for every day in advance that an actual VP (for any of the presidential nominees) is predicted before the official announcement.
3. -1 point for every day in advance that someone is falsely predicted.
4. You can make as many predictions as you want, but they will all be scored whether they are right or wrong.

Sound good?
Logged
Don't die; it's bad for your health!

it happened it happened it happen im so hyped to actually get attacked now

smirk

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16931 on: April 26, 2016, 11:04:27 pm »

I rather imagine the notably more obvious conclusion is that the stormtrooper depictions available are generally as factual as my mother's left testicle :V

Y'do have to consider most of the available texts were written from a very one sided perspective. Fact bending here and there to make the enemy look incompetent is fairly standard as that goes...
This is still the best explanation, as far as I can see. The movies are entertaining, but definitely pro-rebel propaganda. WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW MORE?

Does anyone want to do a vice president prediction contest?  I'm not sure what the rules would be like.
Sure; I'd join in.
Logged
When i think of toady i think of a toad hopping arround on a keyboard
also
he should stay out of the light it will dry out his skin
his moist amphibian skin
.

mainiac

  • Bay Watcher
  • Na vazeal kwah-kai
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16932 on: April 26, 2016, 11:06:45 pm »

My republican hunger games prediction rules were arcane but the way to play the game was straightforward, you just ranked them according to what you thought their staying power was.  This seems like the rules are straightforward but the way to play the game is arcane.

In many situations that's a plus.  I feel like it's not what we want here however.  Maybe people want that?
Logged
Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
--------------
[CAN_INTERNET]
[PREFSTRING:google]
"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Cruxador

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16933 on: April 26, 2016, 11:08:05 pm »

This is entertaining, but you know all this non-canon stuff you're saying is non-canon, right?

P. sure Thrawn doesn't even exist.

I dont give a shit about what JJ Abrams thinks is non canon.  He just isn't very good at world building.
The Expanded Universe ain't exactly Tolkien either.

Well, obviously Darth Plagueis reincarnated as Darth Jar Jar
I actually really like that theory that Jar Jar was originally going to be a major villain.
Does anyone want to do a vice president prediction contest?  I'm not sure what the rules would be like.
1. Vice president predictions must be human (no, eldritch horrors do not count) and eligible for the office (so no predicting that a 2-year-old will be the VP).
Cheney was a VP, mate.
Logged

mainiac

  • Bay Watcher
  • Na vazeal kwah-kai
    • View Profile
Re: Murrican Politics Megathread 2016: There Will Be Hell Toupée
« Reply #16934 on: April 26, 2016, 11:20:56 pm »

The other thing about a veep contest is that there are a lot of possible veep candidates this year.  Trump could pick almost anyone with a pulse because he is Trump.  Because of how non-traditional a Clintonvs Trump match up is, Clinton could be all over the place, anyone from Ralph "more pure then you" Nadar to Jim "killed a man" Webb.  So the rules might need to accommodate a strategy of "hey, here's 20 different names I want to get out there".
« Last Edit: April 26, 2016, 11:23:04 pm by mainiac »
Logged
Ancient Babylonian god of RAEG
--------------
[CAN_INTERNET]
[PREFSTRING:google]
"Don't tell me what you value. Show me your budget and I will tell you what you value"
« Last Edit: February 10, 1988, 03:27:23 pm by UR MOM »
mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.
Pages: 1 ... 1127 1128 [1129] 1130 1131 ... 1342