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Author Topic: General Dating Advice Thread  (Read 16750 times)

AlleeCat

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #15 on: January 17, 2015, 04:42:17 pm »

I can't really say I'm experienced in this, as I've only just found out some things myself.
I'm not exactly the most subtle person in the world and am too chickenshit to ask her straight up if that's the case.
Right here you've just eliminated both possible options.
Seriously, though. Flirt back. Let her know you're interested. Compliment her sometimes and see how she reacts. It's the only way without straight-up asking her out, or worse, nosing into her personal life and/or asking her friends.

Plus, girls really like it when you tell them they look pretty today or tell them their hair looks nice or that you like what they've done with their makeup. We've pretty vain like that.

Disclaimer: I do not claim to speak for all women. Some women do not like being complimented. Compliment women at your own risk. Talk to your doctor and immediately stop complimenting women if complications occur.

That Wolf

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #16 on: January 17, 2015, 08:38:39 pm »

There's a girl who I think is interested in me.  We've been friends for almost four years now, but recently she's been acting... differently.  More flirtatious is probably the best description I can give.  I'm not closed off to the possibility of a relationship, but I'm not exactly the most subtle person in the world and am too chickenshit to ask her straight up if that's the case.  So... what to do
You are lucky you dont need to ask her "out" shes been your friend for a while, just like Alleecat said girls like compliments, give her a compliment then ask her if you two can hang out (alone obviously) and just go for a walk to a park or anywhere nice and if things are going to happen they will, she might even straight up tell you she likes you.
Just talk to her bro, actualy listen, ask about her goals, her day, make appropriate jokes. Show her you care, open/hold doors for her. Most of all be polite AROUND her. Pay attention to her but dont smother her with attention. Remember a woman is like a !!fire!! Haha I must sound insane
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Andux

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #17 on: January 17, 2015, 09:27:24 pm »

We've been friends for almost four years now, but recently she's been acting... differently.  More flirtatious is probably the best description I can give.
Seriously, though. Flirt back. Let her know you're interested.
^ Second this.

she might even straight up tell you she likes you.
Can confirm; had a past (online) relationship start precisely this way.

Disclaimer: Said relationship later imploded spectacularly; we stopped being friends and haven't spoken in ~14 years.
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AlleeCat

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #18 on: January 18, 2015, 01:22:20 am »

Show her you care, open/hold doors for her.
I would say no. IMHO chivalry is dead and should stay that way. I would go on a big long rant about feminism and the patriarchy and crap but this is neither the time or the place.

I mean, even if she expects you to open doors for her, then she's just a bit of a lazy bitch, isn't she? >_>

Orange Wizard

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #19 on: January 18, 2015, 01:31:40 am »

Isn't opening doors for people considered polite any more?
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That Wolf

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #20 on: January 18, 2015, 01:40:14 am »

Show her you care, open/hold doors for her.
I would say no. IMHO chivalry is dead and should stay that way. I would go on a big long rant about feminism and the patriarchy and crap but this is neither the time or the place.

I mean, even if she expects you to open doors for her, then she's just a bit of a lazy bitch, isn't she? >_>
Haha, I do it for everbody.
Yeah I agree that chivalry is dead, but if I am walking infront of you and let the door shut on you I dont think that would make me seem like a nice guy. Its the small things that make the difference. I wouldnt call holding a door chivalrous at all. A knight is chivalrous. And they are well dead, I could go on about the defintion for the word but its not dragon slaying time. The actual word you meant was courtesy. And thats far from dead
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AlleeCat

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #21 on: January 18, 2015, 04:41:44 am »

Well, there's a difference between holding a door open for someone behind you and opening a door for someone while letting them go ahead of you. One is common courtesy, the other implies that you don't think the other person can open a door by themselves.

"Fair maiden! Opening doors is terribly dirty and difficult work! Especially for a dainty young thing such as yourself! Allow me to do that for you! What ho!"

That Wolf

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #22 on: January 18, 2015, 05:12:38 am »

Well, there's a difference between holding a door open for someone behind you and opening a door for someone while letting them go ahead of you. One is common courtesy, the other implies that you don't think the other person can open a door by themselves.
You are putting a negative spin on this and its silly.
I wouldnt care if you shoveled dirt into you maw, running around naked never bathing and howling at the moon (a hobby of mine) I would still open a door for you. Methinks thou needest to alter ones mindset.
I can uderstand your veiw point but its not done because you are female, I do it to all genders. You should do it to be polite.
And both the examples you gave sound exactly the same.
But dont make me accidentaly detract this thread.
Make an arguments thread and I will happily place my 5urist cents
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Arx

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #23 on: January 18, 2015, 05:13:43 am »

It's weird if you're not also going through the door, yeah. I often let people through in front of me just because of the way doors open - it's easiest to just step back when opening it, and then it's fastest for them to go through.
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DJ

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #24 on: January 18, 2015, 09:04:51 am »

Workplace relationships, how bad of an idea? I don't really go out to bars any more, so I don't have much of an opportunity to meet women outside of work (not that the bar scene ever worked for me). There's a rather nice girl at work that's easy to talk to, and she seems like LTR material because she's pretty, smart and hardworking. Thing is, there's no way of knowing how these things will go, and sometimes when things don't work out it can end in a mess. I can't really afford a mess at work, because this job is the best I've ever had.
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That Wolf

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #25 on: January 18, 2015, 10:05:11 am »

Workplace relationships, how bad of an idea? I don't really go out to bars any more, so I don't have much of an opportunity to meet women outside of work (not that the bar scene ever worked for me). There's a rather nice girl at work that's easy to talk to, and she seems like LTR material because she's pretty, smart and hardworking. Thing is, there's no way of knowing how these things will go, and sometimes when things don't work out it can end in a mess. I can't really afford a mess at work, because this job is the best I've ever had.
They work as good as any, its not a bad idea, the only bad things about them is if you work closely and one/both of you fuck it up so bad that you hate eachother.
And about the LTR. Take it one step at a time.
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AlleeCat

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #26 on: January 18, 2015, 02:05:23 pm »

Workplace romance is a bad idea. Just like it'd be a bad idea to go out with your roommate. Ever heard of the saying, "Don't shit where you eat?" Yeah, that pretty much explains it in the loosest possible way.

gimlet

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #27 on: January 18, 2015, 02:18:37 pm »

Well, it depends.  Would you care much if everyone at work found out?  Because they probably will.  If you're working at some steppingstone job you might not care much.  If it's a more professional place and either of you has any thoughts of trying to build a career there, and especially if one has subordinates, you really REALLY want to think it through first...
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DJ

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #28 on: January 18, 2015, 03:01:41 pm »

Well, we're in completely unrelated branches (I'm a junior developer, she's a bartender), so hierarchy isn't an issue, and I don't care about coworkers finding out. I'm just worried that if it ends really badly, as relationships sometimes do, we might not be able to work in the same building.

Anyway, it's not like I got my heart set on her, but I'm just not meeting anyone outside of work. What do people do for that these days? Bars are terrible so I gave up on them, and Internet dating isn't really a thing here, there's only a couple of women on OKC that live within reasonable driving distance.
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AlleeCat

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Re: General Dating Advice Thread
« Reply #29 on: January 18, 2015, 04:54:22 pm »

Dating sites suck. At least the free ones. The problem is, people only use them when they're desperate, and desperation does not make for a good relationship.
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