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[Parsely]

In Soviet Russia, base builds you!

[birdy51]

We need more Dakka Russian bases.

[yobbo]

Antarctica think of the penguins, man.

Wait what where…

[IronyOwl]

October 21st: Splinter

Spoiler: Cold (click to show/hide)

Second base location: Sweden.

I suggest Alaska.

In Soviet Russia, base builds you!

We need more Dakka Russian bases.

Antarctica think of the penguins, man.

Wait what where…

: "I believe this should meet everyone's preference in climate."


"However, it will take some time to become operational."







: "It's good to have more soldiers."

: "Greetings, Otherguy-sempai! We look forward to working with you!"

: "Greetings, Kaos-sempai! We look forward to working with you!"

: "Greetings, Steve Zombie-sempai! We look forward to working with you!"

: "Bzzzzzzt I'm a bug bzzzzzzzzt!"

: "Haha just kidding, these are fun!"

: "You will be the first to die."

: "Where did you even get those?"

: "The storage room has craft supplies!"

: "Braaaaaaaaaaiiiinnnnsss!"

: "Look at me, I'm The One!"

: "..."

Spoiler: Prep (click to show/hide)

"The vessels remain rather competent at dodging the first salvo of missiles, but are nonetheless no match for our whole fleet.

Unfortunately, the transport can't make it before nightfall, so we're forced to delay."




"Another vessel is sighted, apparently keen on abducting humans from the middle of the sea."


"We are forced to wait a bit to respond..."


"...by which point the issue resolves itself."

: "Since it's just a small scout and we have so many squads at full complement, the two earliest of our three newest will go. Otherguy and Kaos, prepare to depart whenever the combat zone becomes lit again."

Spoiler: Bonus (click to show/hide)

: "Kitty-chan, am I gonna die?"

: "Yes."

: "Oh. Does that mean I should spend my stuff before it's too late?"

: "Yes."

: "Okay!"



: "...how does this work again?"

: "First, you select a location to raise. This location must be a rectangle, and it costs 1,000 credits per tile. It will be surrounded by a buffer on any sides adjacent to other land."

: "Then what?"

: "Then you use your tokens in an attempt to bring forth the slavering horrors of other worlds."

: "Then what?"

: "Then you spend additional credits to mold these atrocities against space and time into beneficial structures. The cost varies by size and building type; more complex structures and concepts are more expensive than simpler ones."

: "Neat! So what should I pick?"

: "Well, what do you like?"

: "Living."


"Exotic baubles cannot save you now."

: "Oh. What would Yimi-sempai have picked?"

: "A harem of cute boys."

: "What about Normal Human-kun?"

: "To replace your filthy mammalian flesh with chittering atrocities of pure chitin and wrath."

: "Steve-kun?"

: "To see and know all, and to gaze unflinching into the eye of that terrible seething thing beyond the veil."

: "Barthus-chan?"

: "Expensive alcohol."

: "Yemi-kun?"

: "You, and/or mildly psychotropic mood relaxing substances."

: "How would I go about combining all those things?"


"You could build The Pit."

: "Okay!"

: "...in that case, it will take up a 3x3 square and cost 3,000 credits for the facility itself. It will also require a token."

: "Okay!"

: "Where would you like it built?"

: "Our new base is really far north, so north!"



: "Your construct is ready. You have 19,250 credits and 5 and 1/4 tokens remaining."

: "Neat! What's it do?"

: "It allows you to merge things. The results are unpredictable, and work best when there are exactly two reagents."

: "So now I summon all the parts and stuff them in the pit?"

: "Yes."

: "Okay! I'll take a harem of cute boys, flesh of pure chitin and hate, knowledge beyond mortal sight, expensive alcohol, and attractive mood-altering substances."


"Do you have the fell knowledge to achieve such things?"

: "I am familiar with a wide range of educational literature and descriptive illustrations."

: "Very well then."

: "However, you have five items. Combining them will be difficult."

: "If possible, I would recommend condensing or removing them to produce four instead. That will give you two initial fusions, followed by a third final one."

: "Failing that, I suppose you could attempt to survive long enough to collect eight tokens, or simply attempt a more haphazard and difficult fusion process."

: "Cute boy, forbidden knowledge, hateful chitin, mood-altering substances."


"Then let us begin."

Spoiler: Matrix (click to show/hide)

"We sort of forget all about the downed UFO attempting to engage the landed one. However, it flees."


"It then continues to flee."



: "This will not look good on our record."


"However, we do finally get it."




The first odd thing about this mission is that there are living civilians everywhere.


Otherguy's squad goes north.


Kaos' squad goes south.


Otherguy's squad makes first contact, and Jade Harvest gets to have quite a lot of fun sniping it through the window before retreating to the relative safety of behind the wall.




Its return fire doesn't hurt anyone, but it does scare the bejeezus out of them.




Crimson Feast gets an excellent shot at it from the side, but it is Jade Harvest that finishes it off.



: "Oh yes, I'll bet they're in this giant building... them, and the answers!"



: "Looks pretty empty and real to me, but I did find the alien ship!"


Everyone who isn't a sniper gathers together, breaches the UFO, and nails the alien with a flashbang.



: "GACK!"

Emerald Tachyon has been struck down!

: "Yeah, sure, reeeeeeal convincing."



: "Die screaming. <3"

Spoiler: Faff (click to show/hide)

: "Well done! You only took half as many casualties as the aliens."

: "This game is rigged and dumb."

: "When do I get to blow more things up?"

: "I'm cool here though, man."

: "..."

: "Otherguy and Kaos each receive 17,000 credits, half a token, and 1.5 alloys."





: "However, one squad seems to have acquired considerably more combat experience than the other."

: "Kaos-sempai kept insisting we check under cars."

: "They remembered that one, but mark my words, they forgot something..."

Spoiler: Bird's Eye (click to show/hide)

"We locate another specimen."


"A very swift specimen."


"..."





: "Naturally, the aliens are causing havoc elsewhere at the same time."







: "Fortunately, their larger scouts cannot roll, which means our ace pilot is able to down them easily."



: "Based on our performance at the last site, I've made a decision on how to handle this crash."



: "Namely, Killing it with fire from space."





: "Frost has become officially operational, but currently has no assets. Construction is ordered to alleviate that problem."









: "Meanwhile, we've accomplished some exciting research."

: "How does this help us live?"

: "How's this help us blow things up?"

: "It forms the basis for more advanced technologies."

: "An' those cen be used to blow things up?"

: "Yes."

: "Yay science!"

Spoiler: Panic (click to show/hide)

: "We are encountering more alien activity outside our sphere of influence."



: "An alarming amount, in fact. This operation cannot succeed if we cannot fulfill our official function."





: "On the bright side, construction is completed on a hangar at Frost. This allows us to move one of our lighter craft out of the way to produce a second heavier fighter."



: "Further intriguing research."




"With vital implications for future conduct."



: "Oh dear, two contacts."



: "With one Foxtrot on each, aliens continue to wreak havoc elsewhere. I have become quite convinced that this cannot continue, and that we require an effective response as soon as possible."





: "One catch, one miss."



: "However, the catch does present an interesting opportunity. The last time our forces engaged a downed scout vessel, they were butchered like insolent cattle."

: "However, such a vessel might contain secrets not found in the lighter craft. If we received at least eight confident or adventurous volunteers, we could make another attempt."

: "Otherwise, we'll simply annihilate the site from a distance and collect our money."

Spoiler: Counsel (click to show/hide)

: "The alien menace is outstripping our ability to contain it. I would like recommendations on this topic from each of you."

: "Console cheats."

: "Give em weed."

: "Burn ev'rything."

: "Beg for mercy."

: "Blood Gate."

: "Captain Planet."

: "Ever-hungering army of the dead."

: "Perhaps you should consider this in a bit more detail and get back to me."

[Aseaheru]

Send out foxtrots in pairs to the things that cant dodge, send them around it, and get them to hit it from the side. Those things where designed to go after supersonic bombers afterall... Same general idea for Condors, and for mediums 2x condors and a foxtrot should be fine.

[Digital Hellhound]

What an... interesting place to put our second base.

Volunteer a squad of rookies to clear out the downed scout. Hope for good luck and/or pray. They'll be heroes if they succeed! And acceptable losses if they don't.

[poketwo]

"Ok mammalian rodent hunter, I will like to see how much the Blood Gate costs in that eldritch dimension of yours, in credits and in tokens. Its a portal to a kind of close planet 500 light years away from this star system. It is inhabited with my kind and some standard slave species. and 'Normal Human' has in his plans that I get all his stuff if he dies."

[yobbo]

Yemi will totally go. There's gotta be hot alien babes on one of these ships.

As far as game plans go: we need better guns.

And maybe some sort of armour.

[Orb]

Just a warning. If you send the dropship to a landed UFO and it pops up and the dropship intercepts it, there's no warning box or interception screen. It's an instant loss of the dropship. I would escort dropships with one-two interceptors when attacking landed UFOs (or terror sites...)

[IronyOwl]

October 21st Again: Much Ado About Nothing

Spoiler: Not Again (click to show/hide)

: "Dude, I'll go. I'll bet there's like, chicks in there."

: "Wonderful! However, you'll need a squad."

: "White Lightning!"

: "Black Hurricane!"

: "Red Whirlpool!"

: "Blue Tsunami!"

: "Green Earthquake!"

: "Yellow Landslide!"

: "Cool!"

: "Good luck."

Spoiler: Fire and Smoke (click to show/hide)

: "AHHHHHHH oh it's a civilian. Do we shoot those or no?"

: "I think that's a no, dude."



: "Building clear, onto the field..."



: "Contact! It's Sebillians after all!"









: "Our entire front line just panicked."



: "Sniper power!"

: "Yeah!"



: "AAAH!"

Yellow Landslide has been struck down!



: "Smoke up, time to hope..."



: "I kind of still have a shield..."

: "GHK!"

Red Blaze has been struck down!

: "Why are the safe spots never safe?!"



: "...and why's, like, everything on fire?"



: "Just a little closer... just a little closer..."



: "...I'm still alive!"



: "AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAwwww nuts."



: "Naw babe, you rule."

Spoiler: Analysis (click to show/hide)

: "Oh hey, the field is clear!"

: "Which just leaves..."




: "Jackpot."

: "Awesome. Now if we can just avoid standing in front of the door we've been hearing open and close twice a round the whole mission, we should be good."

: "But first, let's sweep everything else, make sure it's clear, and see if we can find me a spot to snipe from."



: "Heh, found a farmer with a shotgun."

: "...he's probably smarter than us."



: "Found a farmer without a shotgun!"

: "Pathetic, but probably also smarter than us."



: "Alright, everything's clear. Just gotta, uh... hm..."

Spoiler: Whirlwind (click to show/hide)

: "...well I found them."



: "No harm in attacking, right?"



: "LOTS OF HARM IN ATTACKING" *HACK*

Blue Tsunami has been struck down!

: "Looks like we gotta do this or not do it."



: "GAH! ONE alien suppressed, but...!"

: "Well, now or never!"



: "YEAH!"



: "YAAAAAAAAAH!"

: "GAH! Partial success!"



: "Suppression down!"

: "WHY"



: "Damn-!"

Red Whirlpool has been struckdown!



: "GAAAAAAAAAoh for the love of..."



: "GHHH!"

White Lightning has been struck down!





: "That's it, that's the end...!"

: "We're all gonna die!"

:"Well technically I'm gettin' outta here..."

Spoiler: Crow (click to show/hide)

: *COUGH* "Wait, they...?"

: "They're not... gonna open the door and slaughter us?"

: "Awwwww man! You mean we coulda just walked right up there and breached it normally? You mean that door we were hearin' was the inside one all along?"

: "I don't believe this. We almost had it! Just that last one and the one past the inside door, and we'd have captured the ship."

: "Which we totally coulda done if we'd known it was safe in front of the door!"

: "Man, this sucks. If only there was something we could do, other than patching you up with a medkit so you don't bleed to death."

: _{"Thanks by the way" *COUGH*}



: "Ha HA! With my alien corpse, alien... um... glowy ball thing, and alien rifle, I AM INVINCIBLE! And more importantly gained something from the mission."

: "You look like you can barely move. You need help with that?"

: _"yes"



: "Alright, so we got two Sebillian corpses, what's left of Red Blaze, two plasma rifles, two plasma... clips, I guess? And this farmer. Good choice, dude!"

Spoiler: Crimes (click to show/hide)

: "While it was not a successful mission, you did receive good ratings in most categories, and appear to have learned a good deal."

: "Furthermore, I would like to congratulate you on your stunning proof of concept regarding taking medium UFOs. While you were not successful, you were certainly within reach. Well done."

: "Speaking of proofs of concept, I believe many of you expressed interest in Maroon Joy's latest venture?"

: "..."

: "As I'm sure you're aware, Maroon Joy is about to attempt a very unstable project. The results could be fantastic or useless."

: "Let's watch."

: "Item one: Cute boys!"

[5: Poor]

: "Aw man..."

: "A 'poor' result indicates that the item has come through in a somewhat bland fashion, having lost some of its nuance on the way."

: "Well, Item Two: Chitinous Horrors!"

[6: Poor]

: _{"Bah. Could've hooked you up...}

: "Awwww. Well, they'll regain nuance when I merge them, right?"

: "Most likely, but that depends on the merging results as well."

: "Well, Item Three: Writhing knowledge beyond mortal sanity!"

[4: Malus]

: "Uh oh."

: "A 'malus' result indicates that the specimen suffers from some debilitating flaw, having been corrupted or misinterpreted along the way."

: "So my writhing knowledge tentacles..."

: "Erode the minds of those they come into contact with."

: "Well, let's do Item Four, then: Mind-altering substances."

: "Yeah!"

: "Atta lass!"

: "..."

[9: Poor]

: "Well this has been terrible."

: "Indeed."

: "Well, nothing to do now but hurl several sapient creatures into a hideous merging pit with unpredictable results. First up... chitinous horrors and cute boys!"

[7: Poor]

: "Are you sure this thing isn't broken?"

: "I think I'm going to be sick. It's like copies of yourself wearing a costume of a proper being."

: "The device is quite operational, you are merely unfortunate. I could adjust the acceleration settings if it would make your feeble mind feel better."

: "That'd be great! Here's hoping writhing knowledge-tentacles and mind-altering drugs goes better!"

[2: Malus]

: "..."

: "I did warn you."

: "So my writhing mindeating tentacle drug pit is nice and all, but it's not very cuddly. How am I supposed to merge these with the cute chitinboys?"

: "That depends on your preferences, goals, and intentions."

: "Oh, okay. 'With the pit,' then!"

[2: Malus]

: "I earned these tokens from everybody else dying needlessly. I don't know why I thought spending them would go any better than earning them."

: "There, there. Ye got some nice pit fillins outta it. Lookit em writhe n gnash, just waitin fer somebody ta fall in."

: "I suppose they do. Can I take them on missions with me?"

: "Not without a proper structure to breed them, at which point individuals will be available for purchase. Even then, they will attempt to eat your mind, so it may not be advisable."

: "Mind, not brain, right?"

: "The flavor of the two is connected."

: "..."

((Update's been cut a bit short again, apologies.))

[yobbo]

That ship was just begging for a rocket right in the middle of the room.

Or some other sort of incendiary explosive device.

So. Yemi's got high strength.

Is it high enough to carry a "backup" rocket launcher? You know, just in case, like, there's some stuff in the way.

[Puzzlemaker]

This lets play cracks me up, so much death.

[IronyOwl]

November 1st: Damn

Spoiler: Priority (click to show/hide)

: "Our scientists have made another breakthrough!"





: "We uncover some manner of alien fighter craft. Fortunately, it is no match for our own vessels."







: "However, we are still suffering from... issues."





: "Fascinating!"

: "What's this about living?"

: "Aye, we ave armorsmiths now r something?"

: "Oh. Yes, that too."

: "Bear in mind that it is heavy and will-"

: "How heavy?"

: "Roughly as much as ten grenades."



: "..."



: "Haha yeah I totally got this!"

: "Hey actually, lemme try something."



: "Haha, did you guys know rocket launchers weigh 6 kg? Medikits are 2."



: "As you can see, they are also quite expensive and difficult to produce."

: "Two days and double our month's salary is difficult and expensive?"

: "Technically that is twice the cost and several times the time necessary to simply purchase a new one."

Spoiler: Report (click to show/hide)

: "We appear to be consistently underperforming. North America appears nearly satisfied, while South America and Australia appear to be rather unimpressed."

: "I do hope this month goes better than previous endeavors."

[Aseaheru]

Armor is good. Dont give it to people snipers or rocketmen, it reduces sight.

[yobbo]

attempt to use rocket launcher as sweet bong.

stay in tropics where it's warm mon.

don't take orders from anyone but the squirrel. Squirrel knows where it's at.