SO MANY PEOPLE ARGLEBLEBLEBELB
Stop suffocating and eat that sandwich!
[4] YOU EAT THE SANDWITCH
IT IS AMAZE
SHOOT THE GWG WITH THE DEATHSTAR.
[6] YOU SHOOT THE GWG WITH THE DEATHSTAR
THE EARTH IS DESTROYED
THE GWG SCREAMS IN PAIN
EQUIP IRONMAN SUIT IN EPIC MONTAGE SEQUENCE
[3] YOU OBTAIN SUIT
IT IS TOO SMALL AND ANTICLIMACTIC
Assimilate self into GWG, take direct control
[4] YOU PLANT YOURSELF INTO GWG
IT IS TOTALLY GROSS
Appear in a puff of smoke, wisecrack with poor lip-syncing, air-kick physics in the face, then GWG. EDIT: Also, obtain 'Wuxia meter' to show off my awesomeness.
[3] YOU APPEAR NEXT TO GWG
UNFORTUNANTLY THE EARTH IS GONE SO THERE IS NO AIR
THIS IS PROBLEMATIC
Bite him in the gallbladder.
[5] YOU CRAWL DOWN HIS THROAT AND BITE HIS GALLBLADDER
THE GWG SCREAMS IN PAIN
WHAT IN THE WORLD IS WRONG WITH YOU
FORCE GWG TO RESTART THE ART OF MINIMALISM
[6] YOU SET GWG DOWN IN FRONT OF A COMPUTER AND SLAM HIS FACE INTO IT UNTIL HE AGREES TO DO SO
THE GWG SCREAMS IN PAIN
YOU BROKE THE COMPUTER
GOD DANG IT
THEN TIRUIN SHOOTS YOU IN THE FACE
FORCE GWG TO RESTART THE ART OF MINIMALISM
Edit action: SHOOT FURTUKA IN THE FACE.
[4] YOU SHOOT FURTUKA IN THE FACE
IT IS QUITE EFFECTIVE
Shoot GWG in the face. With Morphine. Hell, shoot everyone up with morphine. Fun times all around.
[4] YOU SHOOT HIS FACE WITH MORPHINE
YOU HIT HIM IN THE EYE
THE GWG SCREAMS IN PAIN
Ponder the meaning of life.
[2] YOU HAVE NO IDEA
BOARD THE MASTERFUL MASTAHCHEESE MECHA. ENGAGE IN BATTLE OF STRANTH WITH THE GOLDEN WYRM. NYAAAAHHHHHHH
[6] YOU TAKE CONTROL OF MASTERFUL MECHA
YOU CHASE DOWN GWG AND SHOOT HIS FACE
THE GWG SCREAMS IN PAIN
Rock out beat down the weakling REMUTHRA with the power of ROCK
[1] YOUR ROCK IS INSUFFICIENT
REMUTHRA LAUGHS IN YOUR FACE
YOU LOSE YOUR RIFF
YOU SHAME YOUR FAMILY
Shoot GWG. With a plasma rifle.
[3] YOUR RIFLE MISSES
MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE TO TARGET PRACTICE
Appear leading a squadron of MiG 29s while singing WW2-era Soviet songs! Strafe Remuthra to avenge Siberia and its population, which is actually 40 000 000 people!
[1] PLANES DON'T WORK IN SPACE BECAUSE EARTH IS DESTROYED
YOU DIE WITH SIBERIA
-SNIP-
FIRE THE CANNONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[4] YOU FIRE THE CANNONS
THE GWG SCREAMS IN PAIN
Speed up the tempo to trip killerhellhound up. Do it while barrel rolling.
[3] YOU KEEP THE TEMPO STEADY
KILLERHELLHOUND SLIPS UP
REMUTHRA IS WINRAR
NINJA ATTACK EVERYONE WHILE THEY ARE GETTIN' SUM PAAIINKILLAHZ
[1] A NINJA COMES UP AND SPITS IN YOUR FACE
YOU DIE
Appear in midair with a large crowd to watch the intensifying rock battle between Remuthra and Killer.
And by "a large crowd", I mean a fully equipped army.
[1] CROWD APPEARS
THEY SUFFOCATE IN SPACE
GOOD JOB CLEANING UP THAT MESS
OBTAIN ROMOTE-CONTROLLED MISSILES
[3] MISSILE OBTAINED
Upon my return to life, sponsored by Cthulhu, obtain an eldritch meter for myself because Cthulhu.
[3] CTHULHU KICKS YOU BACK TO LIFE
HE TELLS YOU TO GET LOST
HADOKEN!
[2] YOU SWOOSH YOUR ARMS FORWARD
THEY DO NOTHING
FORCE GWG TO PLAY FATAL, WHERE SATAN IS THE DM AND THE OTHER PLAYERS ARE DEATH AND GWG'S ALLIES
[GM] NO
>Pitch spoiled potatoes at GWG, preferably at super high velocity.
I actually have a bag of them so I should get a bonus right?!?!
I CAN NOT CONFIRM THAT SO NO
[2] YOU LOSE WHATEVER POTATOES YOU MAY HAVE HAD
Convince GM to give me the actions I would have had if I was online when the other turns were being run.
Use said actions to heal myself. Use any left over to fix the damage people have been doing to everything.
[5] YOU LUCKY JERK
YOU GET YOUR OWN ACTIONS
YOU HEAL YOURSELF SLIGHTLY
Cancel GWG's action.
YOU ALREADY TOOK YOUR TURN JERK
SCREAM "BY THE POWER OF GREYSKULL", STAB GWG IN THE FACE WITH A SWORD
[6] YOU PERFROM A HEXTRIPLE BACKFLIP AND SPRING OFF THE RINGS OF SATURN TO FLY AT GWG AND STAB HIS FACE
THE GWG SCREAMS IN PAIN
Become gigantic sentient meteor hurtling towards GWG's location.
72 Hours seconds remain
[3] A METEOR IS YOU
GWG ACTION: WILL BEGIN NEXT TURN
GWG: PAIN THRESHOLD [
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FLYING IN SPACE
SCALES SHINING WITH BLOOD
GWG ALLIES:
NERJIN
OREOSOME (RELUCTANTLY) - GHOST
ANSONTAN2000 (MEAT SHIELD)
FOLLOWING GWG:
REMUTHRA - ON GWG'S BACK - RIFFING LEVEL [
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KILLERHELLHOUND - LOST ALL RIFF
PUFFERFISH - FIRE HOSE PROPULSION
SMIRFINGTHIRD - PLANTED IN GWG
GUNINANRUNIN - CONTROLING MASTERFUL MECHA
SITES ANNIHILATED:
EARTH