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[Lolfail0009]

STOP ROTTING ME PEOPLE

Mwahahahaha!

[SOLDIER First]

Attempt to apologize to my wife again and wonder what to do with seven extra babies.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Raise them to be 7 excellent people?

You have the dice for it.

[hops]

Disregard magical spambot girls, become Dipper Pines instead

[smurfingtonthethird]

Do so, then use local data to locate the Poison Spirit Voiced By Tim Curry.

Roger. Calculating...

Find the Poison Elemental voiced by Christopher Walken.

[5]

You find a poison elemental voiced by Morgan Freeman. luckyyyyyy

Fly with baby terror bird to distract mother terror bird and let HugoLumon line up a shot

[1]

You discover that the bastards can't fly, but you also learn they travel in packs.

Make the Mokey's Dookie radioactive and sapient. Name it Gerard the Radioactive Monkey Dookie.

[6]

It sings annoyingly. The avatar's eyes are glowing.

Fuck it. Increase the local time-space (entropically) around the avatar so he finishes his bloody books.

E: Remuthra, it's magic. Let the magic be magic.

[6]

The avatar doesn't take too kindly to having space-time around it manipulated or annoying poo singing, and rips a reality hole. It lets through a pack of terror birds before closing the portal and going back to his books.

Yell bar fight and punch someone in the face before running off.

[5]

BAR FIGHT ENSUES

You've started the great Mexican tradition of bar-fighting in the streets!

Shh Remuthra, entropy magic is real.


Toss dookie into a portal for monkey science.
(not noticing it's sentient)

[3]

The poo is in the portals. The avatar has released some terror birds for you to play with while he reads.

STOP ROTTING ME PEOPLE

[1]

NO

Attempt to apologize to my wife again and wonder what to do with seven extra babies.

[5]

Wondering ensues. Make em into doctors and shit, do iiiiit

Disregard magical spambot girls, become Dipper Pines instead

[6]

PREVIOUS CONTRACT TERMINATED
NEW CONTRACT LOADED
ABDUCTING DIPPER PINES

You wake up in front of a terror bird.

[kj1225]

Escape and then get my mexican food.

[Lolfail0009]

Enslave new terror bird pack.

[SOLDIER First]

Like, send them all to an orphanage with a note that says 'take me to medical school at 18'?

[smurfingtonthethird]

Nah, tape a note to them saying that they are the rightful heirs to the &$*( throne, where you can't read the name of the throne.

[SOLDIER First]

Suggest this to my wife.

[WillowLuman]

So, the bird pack at the gate got sent off to bother someone else?

[Lolfail0009]

Follow them. Come join the party.
You know you want to.

[hops]

"O....kayyyyyyy. There's a terror bird. In front of me."

Keep calm and run the fuck away

[GrizzlyAdamz]

GRAB AVATAR'S HAND AND JUMP THROUGH PORTAL.
If he resists, GET EMOTIONAL.
We gotta flee!

[IcyTea31]

Should Lolfail0009's action fail, open fire on the terrorbirds. Tell the avatar to read this thread. We really haven't established the actual size of my mech, by the way. Is it larger or smaller than the terrorbirds? Also, MUAHAHAHA this story is never ending and written by the GM, so it can't possibly be deemed bad, unless self-ironically!