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Author Topic: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Not grading on a curve.  (Read 134949 times)

WhitiusOpus

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: BUSINESS FOR THE BUSINESS GOD!
« Reply #180 on: January 20, 2014, 08:05:06 pm »

Aww, no one wants to sell their child's soul? Pansies.

Equip Grate with Toddler sized business suit, an executive office on wall street, and a cute secretary. Begin earning Mounds of Cash for later child enhancement therapy.
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Quote from: The Froggy Ninja
Young Masches: Fetch yonder blade!
Masches grabs his "sword." Navi gasps. Her aura flushes a pinkish hue and she flies out the window.

piecewise

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: BUSINESS FOR THE BUSINESS GOD!
« Reply #181 on: January 20, 2014, 08:20:10 pm »

WE HAVE A TIE CURRENTLY!

It's between Some shit having to do with stocks and such and Attempting to sacrifice some sorta god to our child.


SOMEONE VOTE FOR ONE OF THOSE SO I CAN DO A THING!

Yourmaster

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10/10.
Wants to rape and enslave my innocent night faeries ;-;

Parsely

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: BUSINESS FOR THE BUSINESS GOD!
« Reply #183 on: January 20, 2014, 08:32:00 pm »

YISSSSSSS
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Lenglon

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: BUSINESS FOR THE BUSINESS GOD!
« Reply #184 on: January 20, 2014, 08:34:14 pm »

set him up with stocks in some relatively low risk areas and give him 'babies first stock market' so he can learn, then give them a closet full of sets of clothing. Half normal, the other half Magical Girl cosplay.  Act normally towards the child when they wear the normal ones. Act incredibly kind and compassionate when they were the cosplay. Continue until conditioning is successful.
This.

All hail Grate, Dark Lord of Management!
+1
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((I don't think heating something that is right above us to a ridiculous degree is very smart. Worst case scenario we become +metal statues+. This is a finely crafted metal statue. It is encrusted with sharkmist and HMRC. On the item is an image of HMRC and Pancaek. Pancaek is laughing. The HMRC is melting. The artwork relates to the encasing of the HMRC in metal by Pancaek during the Mission of Many People.))

piecewise

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: BUSINESS FOR THE BUSINESS GOD!
« Reply #186 on: January 20, 2014, 08:46:46 pm »

You pay a shady looking man a lot of money and wait a week. When he does return, in the middle of the night, he's carrying a burlap sack, the contents of which are crying and thrashing about. You place grate on a pedestal and then put on your Richard Nixon mask before repeatedly stabbing into the sack until it stops moving.

You thrust your hand in through a hole in the burlap and get yourself a handful of silvery, slightly glowing blood. You smear the blood all over grate's face and chest, while chanting in backwards Greek about how hard it is to chant backwards in greek. Then you fill a golden cup with the blood that is quickly pooling under the sack and causing ivy and nightshade to grow out of your wood floor.

Grate nods his little head approvingly and takes the cup from your hands and drinks the contents. A laurel crown burns its way into existence and sits itself upon little Grate's brow. His eyes are glowing slightly.


Dappertude:0
Cynicismish:1
Businessness:2
Determinational:0
Survivalous: 0
Sporties:0
Schooliouses:3

Zanzetkuken The Great

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: BUSINESS FOR THE BUSINESS GOD!
« Reply #187 on: January 20, 2014, 08:48:51 pm »

set him up with stocks in some relatively low risk areas and give him 'babies first stock market' so he can learn, then give them a closet full of sets of clothing. Half normal, the other half Doctor Who cosplay.  Act normally towards the child when they wear the normal ones. Act incredibly kind and compassionate when they were the cosplay. Continue until conditioning is successful.
« Last Edit: January 20, 2014, 09:09:54 pm by Zanzetkuken The Great »
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Quote from: Eric Blank
It's Zanzetkuken The Great. He's a goddamn wizard-dragon. He will make it so, and it will forever be.
Quote from: 2016 Election IRC
<DozebomLolumzalis> you filthy god-damn ninja wizard dragon

WhitiusOpus

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Sacrificing Gods to Babies.
« Reply #188 on: January 20, 2014, 08:49:11 pm »

Holy shit that was awesome.

Congratulate Grate with a beating. To enhance his toughlinious.
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Quote from: The Froggy Ninja
Young Masches: Fetch yonder blade!
Masches grabs his "sword." Navi gasps. Her aura flushes a pinkish hue and she flies out the window.

superBlast

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Sacrificing Gods to Babies.
« Reply #189 on: January 20, 2014, 08:49:31 pm »

Sacrificing is fun! What else can we sacrifice to our child?
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"Come oooooon, a little insanity never hurt anyone.... Well except for that one guy, but never mind him." -superBlast

I gots a new livestream! Check it out here at http://www.twitch.tv/iamsuperblast

Parsely

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Sacrificing Gods to Babies.
« Reply #190 on: January 20, 2014, 08:49:48 pm »

Holy shit that was awesome.

Congratulate Grate with a beating. To enhance his toughlinious.
+1
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WhitiusOpus

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Sacrificing Gods to Babies.
« Reply #191 on: January 20, 2014, 08:50:12 pm »

Shouldn't the tie enhance his dappertude?
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Quote from: The Froggy Ninja
Young Masches: Fetch yonder blade!
Masches grabs his "sword." Navi gasps. Her aura flushes a pinkish hue and she flies out the window.

Zanzetkuken The Great

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Sacrificing Gods to Babies.
« Reply #192 on: January 20, 2014, 08:50:41 pm »

Congratulate Grate

+1

with a beating. To enhance his toughlinious.

-1

Sacrificing is fun! What else can we sacrifice to our child?

Zeus.
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Quote from: Eric Blank
It's Zanzetkuken The Great. He's a goddamn wizard-dragon. He will make it so, and it will forever be.
Quote from: 2016 Election IRC
<DozebomLolumzalis> you filthy god-damn ninja wizard dragon

Parsely

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Sacrificing Gods to Babies.
« Reply #193 on: January 20, 2014, 08:51:41 pm »

Why just one? Why not give the whole Pantheon the axe?
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Empiricist

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Re: FUCK YOU, DAD!: Sacrificing Gods to Babies.
« Reply #194 on: January 20, 2014, 08:52:18 pm »

Why just one? Why not give the whole Pantheon the axe?
+1
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Quote from: Caellath (on Discord)
<Caellath>: Emp is the hero we don't need, deserve or want
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