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Author Topic: Help with a girl  (Read 4701 times)

KingBacon

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Re: Help with a girl
« Reply #45 on: December 08, 2013, 08:36:54 pm »

Ask your mutual friend if this girl is part of any weird Christian sects.... met a Math Phd who was Wisconsin Synod (she was totally bonkers and not in a nerdy type of way.)
Just a red flag, but it could be nothing.

If not, then it was just one of those little awkward things.

(Note in regards to Tiruin's post: Some nondenominational sects (and the sect I mentioned in particular) require doctrinal conformity and can be quite radical. This girl I met in particular was homeschooled and her parents quit their jobs and moved 200 miles when their old church closed just to be part of the same Lutheran sect. That and some splinter groups from the ELCA are also quite particular... Generally, by weird, I mean the group is openly bigoted towards homosexuals or vehemently denies evolution / has an uncompromisingly rigid doctrine. Some Christian sects are quite stringent on what constitutes their "in" group and "out" groups, if you become involved with someone who has such group definitions, they might want you to join said "in" group because their doctrine requires it, which may or may not be alright depending on one's own belief system. Sorry for the off topic tirade.)
« Last Edit: December 09, 2013, 08:29:54 am by KingBacon »
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Tiruin

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Re: Help with a girl
« Reply #46 on: December 09, 2013, 01:34:43 am »

...Weird Christian sects meaning..? What is about those sects that lead to what you're trying to say?
I really think you need to expound that whole statement there and give its context, as it doesn't seem rational without it for anything to be based upon.
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Vector

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Re: Help with a girl
« Reply #47 on: December 09, 2013, 11:30:46 pm »

There's sects of Christianity that require marriage within the church, and often have very stringent rules about young people never being alone together before being married.

For example, my step-grandmother thinks I'm a whore because I've dated more than one man, and pretty much told me I had better date a nice German boy so that we can all get together and sing church songs.


Anyway, how old is she, OP?  Can you figure out from one of your friends how much dating experience she has?  This can be pretty normal if she's over 18 but not a full-fledged adult, and never dated before.
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Akura

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Re: Help with a girl
« Reply #48 on: December 14, 2013, 11:08:48 am »

Ask your mutual friend if this girl is part of any weird Christian sects....
I'm just going to say "no" on that one.

Anyway, how old is she, OP?  Can you figure out from one of your friends how much dating experience she has?  This can be pretty normal if she's over 18 but not a full-fledged adult, and never dated before.
In the area of 21, I'm told. And as for dating experience, I would hazard a guess at none.


The thing is, and I'm pretty hesitant about saying this, is that she has a mental disability. I'm not sure what exactly, since I don't think it's a good idea to ask just yet. I only learned about it from something her mother said. She's fully competent and intelligent, mind you, but it's probably something that's affected her social development. I've been through something like that myself - I have Tourette's Syndrome, though I've mostly kept the major symptoms of it in check for years now.
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AlleeCat

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Re: Help with a girl
« Reply #49 on: December 15, 2013, 01:59:04 am »

The thing is, and I'm pretty hesitant about saying this, is that she has a mental disability. I'm not sure what exactly, since I don't think it's a good idea to ask just yet. I only learned about it from something her mother said. She's fully competent and intelligent, mind you, but it's probably something that's affected her social development. I've been through something like that myself - I have Tourette's Syndrome, though I've mostly kept the major symptoms of it in check for years now.
Well if you didn't really notice anything and it affected her social development, she could have Asperger's. Could also be depression or some kind of Schizoaffective disorder. In any case, I wouldn't ask about it until much later unless she starts talking about it herself or ends up dropping serious red flags.

scriver

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Re: Help with a girl
« Reply #50 on: December 15, 2013, 08:50:31 am »

For example, my step-grandmother thinks I'm a whore because I've dated more than one man, and pretty much told me I had better date a nice German boy so that we can all get together and sing church songs.

...
...
...She doesn't really know many Germans does she ;D
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