Use Standard Issue Plasma-Gun on Gorn Guro's nether regions.
http://wiki.teamfortress.com/w/images/2/2f/Scout_specialcompleted12.wav?t=20100625225901
Umm....your kinda having your Carotid Artery (aka THE REALLY REALLY IMPORTANT ONE) RAPED, I don't think you're currently capable of aiming a gun right now....and probably never will be again. Just a heads up.
Fuck dat.
[6] You run away screaming, tossing the hotpants guards aside in your haste to get straight the hell away from the horrid monster that is invading the ship. You receive a reward as Security Chief of the year, and also this incredibly sarcastic sentence engraved in the trophy.
Frighten off aliens by playing Eurodance over PA system at full volume.
[6] Gorn Guro is nearly joined by alien backup, but your terrible music has frightened them off. It also frightened the rest of our non-player marines, they are all running and screaming and shooting nothing cuz their aim is terrible.
Send in more marines!!!! Shoot him!!!!! Also, Clone more marines!!!
CLONING IS NOT THE ANSWER TO EVERYTHING! IT DOESNT WORK THAT FAST! Also the marines are all too scared by the Eurodance. And I think you're still on the bridge. That's usually where the captain is isn't it?
Wow, it all falls to our JANITOR to save the ship from the Artery Rapist. AWESOME
"Clean" this alien with highly caustic chemicals!
[6] <-----FUCKING REALLY?
Scruffy fires a highly pressurized torrent of cleaning supplies at Gorn, forcing him to stop raping the artery of our own personal Leeroy Jenkins. Gorn is heavily wounded by the blast and lumps of skin begin to burn off!
You all just got schooled by the JANITOR. You people suck at combat. You REALLY REALLY do.