This takes place in the same universe as
this game but has more complex rules. You may consider that game as an expert guide on how to act like a priest.
Standard rtd d6 rolls, examples being:
1- Your Mass is awful and you get an Awful Mass Bonus for next turn and the congregation complain so hard they start to riot and one elderly man sets fire to the curtains and throws pews through the windows and then several elderly women knock you over and start beating you with the candlesticks until you vomit down your cassock and just then the bishop turns up and he asks you Father Pink just what the hell is going on here you shitearsed eejit you’re meant to be taking care of my goldfish Mavis not desecrating the house of God you feckin’ eejit take this take this take this as he kicks you right in the face and then afterwards right in the arse too and then one of the elderly women ties you up and starts drowning you in the baptismal font and oh
2- You forget the words to Mass.
3- You mumble a mediocre Mass.
4- You say a good Mass.
5- You perform an awesome Mass. Perhaps you get an Awesome Mass Bonus.
6- You say such an awesome Mass that the congregation gets totally naked as they sing your praises and you receive an Awesome Mass Bonus for the next turn and then the bishop turns up and he asks you Father Red just what the hell is going on here you feckin’ eejit you’re meant to be saying Mass not hosting some kind of shitin’ orgy you big fat gobshite take this take this take this as he kicks you right up the arse and then when you fall over in the head and in the face and then he leaves in a hurry and oh god you see one of the ancient naked congregation members in the ancient naked part up really close and you are a bit scarred for life so
Combat is d6 vs d6 to hit. A hit results in d6 HP lost. A natural 6 on the HP d6 is a critical: roll another dice for d6 HP lost. Repeat as required. 0 HP is death. HP regenerates at 1 HP per turn of not taking damage.
Special combat options include: taking partial (i.e. can still fire) cover (+1 or +2 to defence die, depending), total (i.e. cowering in a pit, can’t fire) cover (+3 to defence die, probably), defensive melee (taking a -2 attack penalty for a +2 defence bonus), defensive Mass (+2 defence bonus but cannot attack, although can perform Mass) and that kind of thing.
Burning may arise as a result of certain actions. When a person is on fire, they lose d3+1 HP per turn, until they are extinguished. If they touch another person whilst burning, there is a one in six chance of igniting that other person.
If you
complete a mission you get money. Completing a mission means you reduce the bad guy to 0 HP. Having money means you can buy an item.
If you
survive a mission you get a level up. Surviving a mission means not feckin’ dying. A level up means you choose a skill: it
doesn’t mean you become a bishop.
Four players at a time.Bold your actions.You may only swear after referring to the acceptable swear words list (artistic combinations of acceptable words therein are encouraged). Penalties are applicable. I will strongly diswelcome anything that is not appropriate: this is a family game. Use your judgement please.