Turn Forty SixAction: Callously loot the enemies while my inept companions retch and die. I want that wizard hat! And I bet a Sabertooth from the sheep would make a good dagger...
"Well," announces Lady Foxglove, stepping between and over her companions
"At least no one important is going to die."She steps daintily round Medha’s burning elbow, about to direct a particularly pleasing snigger floorwards when suddenly the flame shoots out towards Fondler Foxglove’s ankles, tripping her up and sending her flying to the ground with fire leaping up her legs!
She finds her face in a pile of dusty bones and under… under some kind of ancient and mouldy wizard hat.
…There’s a nearby chuckle.
Burning Acquired: Lady Foxglove Vainglorious III:
Very Heavy Leg Fire!Hat Acquired: Lady Foxglove Vainglorious III:
Mouldy Wizard Hat!Go get a health potion from somewhere while extinguishing my armfire.
Fukken smarmit gaddin korbok fukken bytches the lot of themThere’s also a nearby disgruntled grumble as Bukkar frantically extinguishes his non-burning arm.
…Success achieved, he wanders off to look for a health potion.
He finds a door on the other side of the room.
It’s unlocked.
He pulls the handle.
…Rocks fall on Bukkar’s head!
Bukkar vomits!
A troglodyte zombie grunts hello!
Attempt to cure my own Vomiting.
…Meanwhile, Whiz is making his constipation face.
It’s not his most handsome face.
He’s trying to make the Vomiting disappear through sheer force of will.
It doesn’t work.
Grab Medha's severed arm and stick it back on, then apply the Bandage of Healing to her burned, battered and bleeding body.
"Crikey, you look worse than me."Gervedder, thinks Medha, has a lovely bedside manner. More so than the faceless mage. She glances idly at her burning elbow. She can’t really feel the pain anymore, because she’s a bit busy concentrating on the pain where her arm used to be.
Her arm is in Gervedder’s hands now.
She giggles.
”Your capable hands, hppff!”"Are you suffering from delirium? I'm surprised this bandage lasted as long as it did. Let’s ram this back into place and hope for the best, eh?"”Nngghgnng!”"Serious delirium? Anyway. This might sting…"…It does sting, a little, and once the headrush from the potent delirium wears off Medha is delighted to see that she is now the proud possessor of two fully functional arms.
She looks up at Gervedder and swoons a bit.
If Gervedder uses the Bandage of Healing and she's all good now, use my bandage on me instead.
…Nearby Tackov puts on his best compassionate and selfless face as he holds a dirty old non-magical bandage in one hand and tries to thrust his severed arm into his bleeding stump with the other.
It stings, a lot, and once he’s passed out from the pain twice, recovered, given up, thrown his arm frustratedly into the corner of the room and finally tied the bloody bandage around his bloody armstump as tight as he bloody can Tackov is delighted to see that at least he isn’t bleeding to death and that all he has to do to be the proud possessor of two arms is to walk over to the corner and pick one up. He does so, and looks about on the floor for his face.
Name: Troglodyte Zombie
Status:Health: [HP: 95/100] |
Abilities: Rock Throw |
The Vomiting Current Players:Name: Tackov Cedtry
Class: Level 2 Wind Mage
Status: –1 to social interaction. +1 to head defence. -1 to melee.
Health: [HP: 15/55] |
The Vomiting! |
Leprified Face! |
Severed Right Arm!Abilities: Magical Typhoon I,
Wind Blast I,
Wind Step I,
Squishy,
Sissy Slap FightInventory: Minor Mana Potion x1,
Scroll of Beginner’s Fireball x1,
Masterwork Helm!, one memorised use of:
Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast! a bandage.
Name: Whiz
Class: Level 2 Whiz Wiz(ard)
Status: -1 to lower leg damage. -1 to social interaction. +1 to balancing. Shield - +2 to defence, 1 turn.
Health: [HP: 45/80] |
Giant Rat’s Tail! |
The Vomiting!Abilities: Shield I,
Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast! Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast II,
Obviously a Powerful Wizard,
It’ll Make You Blind!Inventory: Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver,
Raider’s Dress of Shin Protection, 37 Yuros, Fancy Clothes,
Scroll of Beginner’s Fireball x1,
Middling Mana Potion x1, Cutlass, Three daggers,
Minor Health Potion x3, +1 Bolt of Accuracy x4, +1 Bolt of Burning x5, +1 Bolt of Paralysis x2,
Middling Health Potion x1.
Name: Medha Correo
Class: Level 2 Curse Crafter
Status: -1 to gut damage. +1 to chest damage. -1 to melee.
Health: [HP: 10/80] |
Severed Rib! |
Severed Rib!Pet Skull Health: [HP: 10/10]Abilities: Opportunistic Attack,
Bad Luck Curse,
Curse of the Fool,
Wandering Asshole,
Curse of the Curse CrafterInventory: Dagger, Half a dress, 76 bandages,
Neckless of the Ribless, Coffee (half a jug), Small bottle of Mage blood, Dagger, Lock picking kit,
Iron Cuirass, unlit torch, 96 Yuros (real gold), Bones, Crossbow,
Brittle Jagged Groinbone Dagger of Good! Name: Gervedder Vietzo
Class: Level 2 Opportunistic Messenger
Status: -1 to gut/chest damage.
Health: [HP: 30/80] |
Burning Chest Hair!Abilities: Nimble Feet,
This Messenger Delivers,
Make Way for the Messenger! Important,
Stop For DirectionsInventory: Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver, 8 bandages, 7 Yuros,
Iron Cuirass, Crossbow.
Name: Lady Foxglove Vainglorious the III
Class: Level 2 Ravenhaired Crusader
Status: Super-presentable! Cursed! (3/3)
Health: [HP: 70/80] |
Very Heavy Leg Fire!Abilities: Silent as a Raven’s Wing,
Opportunistic,
Honeyed Tongue,
Vain,
Self-RelianceInventory: Minor Health Potion x1, Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver,
Necklace of Permanent Death! Mouldy Wizard Hat! Name: Bukkar Crangrom
Class: Level 2 Ragin' Mage
Status: -1 to social interaction. -1 Pain penalty.
Health: [HP: 5/80] |
The Vomiting! |
Fractured Groin!Abilities: Rage Lazors I,
Ass of the Flaming Foot I,
Lightning Fist I,
Always Looking For a Fight,
Always Hungover Inventory: Sword of Severing! Crossbow, 1
Stinking Eejit cheese, 2 Yuros, 400 Green Farthings.