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[GalenEvil]

Your tongue gains the powers of Mr. Fantastic and then you kiss the person closest to you on the lips for a week.

Who the hell is Mr.Fantastic?

edit: It also appears only my tongue can ever gain his fantastic powers, feel free to correct me.

Mr. Fantastic is from The Fantastic Four, an old Marvel Comic (or are they from the DC Universe?). He is married/courting The Invisible Woman and friends with The Thing and that guy whose catch-phrase is "FLAME ON!!!" Mr. Fantastic has the ability to stretch any body part at will, similarly to how the wifey from The Incredibles can.

And now an insta-edit since I see that Scelly somehow ninja'd me by about 20 minutes... damn I take too long to read and type shit

[SeriousConcentrate]

Yeah, you got lucky Megaman. Whoever you're kissing will probably appreciate that. Me, I'm lying outside, genderless, in the sunshine, surrounded by children while lightning repeatedly strikes me. (Also, Guardian G.I. now has the best sig. :3)

New spell time! Taking first five results.

It begins hailing for the rest of the day. There is a sudden eclipse permanently.

So... if it begins hailing for the rest of the day, and the sun is never seen again due to the eternal eclipse... does it hail forever, or not at all?

There is a sudden eclipse repeatedly.

Derp?

Your right ear turns gray and becomes stronger, then you are filled with overwhelming peace and joy.

So do I hear better or can I benchpress cars with my right ear alone? This is one confusing spell.

An apocalyptic flaming hailstorn rends the land and then you turn into a snake.

Wait. Snakes don't have ears. I lose my strong ear. ;_;

It begins to rain and then you grow a pair of white feathery wings.

So, recap. Rain and hail, flaming apocalypse, a permanent eclipse that happens repeatedly, and not only am I QUETZCOATL, apparently I'm damn happy about it. This is a much better result that the previous spell.

[RedWarrior0]

 You have an incredible orgasm repeatedly.
-*writes down spell for later use*
 Your entire body becomes fireproof. Your right arm is cured of any maladies permanently.
-As long as fireproofing isn't a malady...
 You go numb all over, then you become inexplicably aroused, and finally you become slowfooted.
-There are no words.
 You become physically stronger, then you turn into a small bird, and finally you become more intelligent.
-I hope I keep the strength boost.
 You are filled with overwhelming peace and joy and then everyone in the room becomes a child for an hour.
-At least it's peace and joy, not inexplicable arousal.
 You become more intelligent, then you are filled with overwhelming peace and joy, and finally you turn into a falcon.
-Another smart bird spell
 Everyone can read your mind and then all nearby wood sprouts tree branches permanently.
-For enemies. I guess.
 You become a ghost and then you turn into a bear for a week.
-Bear Spirit!
 Your eyes scream for the rest of the day.
-Oh dear. What did I see?
 You are struck by lightning, then cotton plants grow from all nearby cotton, and finally you grow a pair of white feathery wings.
-Angelic lightning of cotton plants!
 The sun shifts to noon-high and glares brightly and then you become a plant elemental.
-Photosynthesis!
 Your right leg shrinks permanently. Your right foot gains the powers of Mr. Fantastic for a week.
-Makes surreptitiously kicking people easier, I suppose
 Your hair gains the powers of Mr. Fantastic permanently.
-Where's the dye so I can fit in an anime?

[Reudh]

Roll five and this is what happens to me!

Your right ear falls off, but only for a few minutes.

So that has done pretty much nothing.

Your left hand throbs in pain and then the walls around you bleed, but only for a few minutes.

Creepy but otherwise unaffecting...

You turn into a tiger for the rest of the day.

Rawr?

Your left leg becomes electric-proof for a week. Your right arm feels icy cold repeatedly.

Rawr...

A veritable monsooon-like downpour begins twice. You get a free wish repeatedly.

My wish is to be returned to being human.

[Tarran]

You punch the first person you see, then you forget every language you know, and finally you grow a draconic, arrow-headed tail.

Or in other words, I became an uneducated demon.

Your teeth turn golden and then you go deaf permanently.

Aw dammit, I became an old man.

There is a light drizzle of rain and then you become a fire elemental, but only for a few minutes.

That is a very sucky spell, I swear.

Everyone in the room becomes a teenager, then you become slowfooted, and finally you become inexplicably aroused.

Oh my.

You become more intelligent, then you lose all elemental powers (and weaknesses), if any, and finally you turn into a lizardfolk.

Good thing I didn't have any elemental powersss. Only problem, I'm a lizzzard man now.

A tornado strikes repeatedly. Gems and jewelry materialize near you twice.

God's giving out free gems. Assuming you can survive a tornado that is literally out to kill you.

ALL OF YOUR EYES turn gray and then all items and clothing in the room disappear twice.

As if things disappearing wasn't enough, make them disappear while they don't exist why don't you.

The temperature drops by 40 degrees F and then you turn into the opposite gender.

Huh, apparently my gender is related to the temperature. All the more reason to go to cold places.

You turn into a fish and then your intelligence drops for the rest of the day.

My intelligence dropped? YOU DON'T SAY.

ALL OF YOUR EYES turn lavender and then you become a teenager twice.

But... I'm already a teenager. ...I'm so confused.

You grow a pair of white feathery wings and then you become a teenager twice.

Yay I'm an angel again and GOD DAMMIT I'M ALREADY A TEENAGER STOP MAKING ME ONE AGAIN.

Gems and jewelry materialize near you, then you are struck by lightning, and finally you feel frightened.

I feel frightened after being struck by lightning? YOU DON'T SAY.

Your head has an orgasm for the rest of the day.

...

All of your limbs begin attacking you.

But... what will they attack if I have no control?

A thick fog rolls in and then you grow a pair of black dragon wings twice.

Hell yes, two sets of dragon wings.

You turn into a mermaid and then all items and clothing in the room disappear repeatedly.

Well, not like I needed them anymore anyway.

Your right arm falls off permanently. Your ass enlarges repeatedly.

I don't think I need to say anything.

You grow a draconic, arrow-headed tail, then you grow a pair of black dragon wings, and finally you become a teenager.

Aw yes.

[SeriousConcentrate]

Your vision improves, then everyone can read your mind, and finally you turn into the opposite gender.

Well, other than the mindreading, I don't see a downside here.

The walls bleed around you, then you grow a pair of black dragon wings, and finally your hearing improves.

Huh. I like this effect. Kickass benefits and if I cast it in someone I don't like's house, they have to clean blood off of the walls. Total win here.

Your ass shrinks for an hour. Your hair becomes stronger for a week.

I... guess that's good?

There is a sudden eclipse and then you become inexplicably aroused.

This eclipse feels so good gurl.

Your entire body is cured of any maladies. Your penis, if any, bursts into flames permanently.

...So happy this spell turned me female earlier, that could have been nasty. >.>

Your ass turns bright orange and bleeds, then gems and jewelry materialize near you.

This spell is off to a fan-fuggin-tastic start.

Your penis, if any, feels icy cold and then you become drunk for an hour.

At this point, trust me, I'll be getting drunk on my own. But thanks anyway.

Your teeth bleed.

My teeth or my gums? Because teeth themselves bleeding is freaky. >.>

A torrid blizzard suddenly strikes for an hour. It is hot and dry outside.

Oh, man, I love them hot and dry blizzards.

You laugh maniacally.

You know what? Sure, why not. I'm drunk off my bright orange bleeding ass, my teeth are bleeding, I can't feel my genitals, there's a hot and dry blizzard roaring in the streets... might as well laugh it up. At least I'm rich.

[Sus]

Mr. Fantastic is from The Fantastic Four, an old Marvel Comic (or are they from the DC Universe?). He is married/courting The Invisible Woman and friends with The Thing and that guy whose catch-phrase is "FLAME ON!!!" Mr. Fantastic has the ability to stretch any body part at will, similarly to how the wifey from The Incredibles can.

He's also a genius, yet completely useless somehow.

[Sirus]

It begins hailing and then you go blind for an hour.

So far, not so good

Your tongue becomes weaker and then you turn into a unicorn, but only for a few minutes.

Pointless. I couldn't even see myself as a unicorn, as I'd be blind.

The moon is full in the sky for an hour. You grow a draconic, arrow-headed tail, but only for a few minutes.

Another useless, temporary spell. At least the moon coming out would be cool if it were the middle of the day.

Your tail, if any, falls off for an hour.

Good-bye, draconic tail I only had for a few minutes anyway <_<

There is a sudden eclipse and then you become an air elemental for the rest of the day.

...Huzzah? These wishes were terrible.

[jaxy15]

You become undead and then you are struck by lightning permanently.

IT'S ALIVE
IT'S ALIIIIIIIIIIVE

An apocalyptic flaming hailstorn rends the land for a week. It is hot and dry outside permanently.

No, really?

Your right hand begins attacking you.

STOP HITTING YOURSELF, STOP HITTING YOURSELF!

You have an incredible orgasm and then you grow a pair of white feathery wings.

Looks like I died happy.

You become hungry and then you are filled with arcane energies permanently.

Alright, I'll conjure myself some bacon.

[dreadmullet]

There is a sudden eclipse permanently.

The sun vanished?

You become more fleetfooted and then you punch the first person you see repeatedly.

In other words, I become The Scout.

Your hair falls off for the rest of the day.

Yay, free haircuts.

You become a ghost permanently.

D:

A strong wind picks up and then you burst into flames.

The wind was so strong the friction set me on fire.

Your teeth turn golden and then your intelligence drops repeatedly.

[Insert rapper joke here.]

Your head falls off and then you kiss the person closest to you on the lips.

What

[Sirus]

Local gravity reverses for a week. A thunderstorm begins out of nowhere.

All the more reason to stay indoors!

The moon is full in the sky and then you feel frigid to the bone.

Ok, a little weird.

Your nose turns lavender and is cured of any maladies, then you turn into a wolf.

D:

ALL OF YOUR EYES turn navy blue and then spiders and centipedes crawl all over your body permanently.

DDDDDD8

Your left ear feels icy cold twice. Your navel screams repeatedly.

WHY DO I GET SUCH HORRIBLE SPELLS?

[zomara0292]

You feel frightened, then you have an incredible orgasm, and finally you grow a draconic, arrow-headed tail.

Must find whatever scared me that bad. . . . . . I am not a perv.

There is a faint breeze and then you forget every language you know, but only for a few minutes.

 . . . .  got nothing funny for this.
 

A torrential rain falls for the rest of the day. You become an air elemental twice.

So torrential storms turn me into wind. . . . awesome.

Snow begins to fall and then you become a centaur.

Human in the summer, Centaur in the winter.

A torrid blizzard suddenly strikes for the rest of the day.

And I am staying inside now. Too bloody cold.

Your penis, if any, enlarges and then you become an air elemental permanently.

Did I have to get an erection to turn into a wind monster?

A torrential rain falls and then you kiss the person closest to you on the lips.

As an air elemental, right?

[Cecilff2]

All of your limbs become stronger for a week.

YES!  CECIL SMASH!

You become a fire elemental for the rest of the day.

Oh man this is just freakin awesome.  Could it get any better th-

Your teeth explode for a week.

OH GOD WHY

Your hair becomes fireproof and then you become physically stronger for the rest of the day.

What's with all this becoming stronger and fire related things.

Your right arm feels icy cold. Everybody in the room but you has an orgasm, but only for a few minutes.

...well this is awkward...

And it's making me angry because my teeth keep exploding.  CECIL SMASH EVERYTHING WITH FIRE POWERS.

[GlyphGryph]

Your teeth exploding is simply another one of your super powers. You are a FIRE ELEMENTAL with an EXPLODING BITE ATTACK and IMMENSE STRENGTH that can make everyone looking at your orgasm.

What's not to like?

[UristMcDwarf]

Local gravity reverses. There is an earthquake permanently.

Glad I'm not on the ground!