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[lordcooper]

I must confess that there has been a lot more animal cruelty than I imagined there would be.

[lordcooper]

You throw the dog at it's owner who scoops it up and runs away sobbing.  You punch the horn a few times before glancing under the wheel.  There aren't any visible wires.  You quickly run back into the building and barge into the businessman's apartment.  You search through his coat pockets until you find the car keys.  Sirens can be heard in the distance as you leave the building again.

It is now 7:10 AM.  You are a bit drunk.  Your breath and hand smell of alcohol.  You have to be at work by 8AM and it is just over an hours walk or 20 minutes in the car.  You have the businessman's car keys and the police are on their way.

[raptorfangamer]

quickly!

USE KEYS on FANCY CAR!

then START FANCY CAR!

USE FANCY CAR to WORK at JOB!

DODGE the POLICE!

[MarcAFK]

There's stil plenty of time for being a bastard before work, besides a bastard is liable to arrive late anyway. let's see....

quickly!

USE KEYS on FANCY CAR's bodywork!

then START FANCY CAR!

Back Fancy car INTO A TREE OR SOMETHING

USE FANCY CAR Piss off and then DODGE the POLICE! For half an hour wih much civlian casualties.

Arrive late to WORK at JOB!

[lordcooper]

You run the keys down the entire length of the businessman's car before getting in and starting the engine.  You reverse into a nearby postbox,  scratching the paint and denting the bumper.  The rest of the journey is pretty uneventful and you seem to have succeeded in avoiding the cops.

It is now 7:32 AM.  You are a bit drunk.  Your breath and hand smell of alcohol.  You start work at 8AM.  You are inside the businessman's trashed car and just down the road from your workplace, Generica Customer Relations Division.  The street is deserted.  There are a few parked cars and numerous offices, along with a small café.

[raptorfangamer]

crash into café and blame it for getting on the way.

[Yoink]

>Stop at the cafe for a calming cup of coffee to go, then feign insanity and leg it without paying.

[lordcooper]

crash into café and blame it for getting on the way.

You are a bastard, not suicidal!

You calmly pull over, blocking in a couple of vehicles as you park.  Your boss is inside the cafe.  Continue with grand theft latte?

[ComradeGafarov]

Steal COFFEE, pour COFFEE on BOSS.

[Yoink]

No, >Bum spare change for coffee off of Boss, explain how we lost all our cash paying for our little sister's life-saving brain surgery. Then hit on the cashier as we pay for coffee.

[ComradeGafarov]

What if the cashier is a Mexican man?

[Yoink]

Then make a bastardly, stupid racist comment. *sagenod*

[Furtuka]

True to get ourselves fired because we hate our job

[Mullet Master]

Order ESPRESSO. DRINK ROBUSTLY.

BELCH with GUSTO and EAT A MAGAZINE.

[MarcAFK]

Order ESPRESSO. DRINK ROBUSTLY.

BELCH with GUSTO and EAT A MAGAZINE.

This.