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Author Topic: Shortest fort  (Read 11880 times)

Thudde

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Shortest fort
« on: April 23, 2012, 08:52:08 am »

Fire snake meat?  Sounds good...  start game, wagon catches fire, everyone burns.
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SRD

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #1 on: April 23, 2012, 09:20:33 am »

Embarked on river, river thaws, lasted 30 seconds.
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

Pyro

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #2 on: April 23, 2012, 09:24:03 am »

Thanks for sharing those. I am trying not to giggle aloud in the office :P
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SRD

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #3 on: April 23, 2012, 09:31:34 am »

Oh wait, embarked, game froze, went to make a sandwich, came back all dwarves massacred by a giant badger.
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

cikulisu

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #4 on: April 23, 2012, 09:44:41 am »

embarked, rain of slush, mass knockout, eaten by skeletal harpies. under a minute.
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SRD

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #5 on: April 23, 2012, 09:45:52 am »

Why would harpies be skeletal if they're already evil? Like I've never seen skeletal/zombie werewolves, or harpies (adventuring from 40d -> .07)
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

AfroScotsDwarf

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #6 on: April 23, 2012, 09:58:26 am »

embark on alligator, lasts 10 secs
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"i would rather consume nutrition which has become FUKIN MAED GON HOT BY DA FIRE." Edward on hot food
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SRD

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #7 on: April 23, 2012, 10:02:43 am »

embark on alligator. Feed on alligator that was crushed by wagon, OH WAIT WAGONS ARE NPCS AND CAN'T CRUSH THINGS.

This game... Fml.
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

Cobaldunderpants

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #8 on: April 23, 2012, 10:05:58 am »

Embark. Reveal. Prospect. No iron ore. Abandon. 5 secs.
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"I'm sorry, so you want me to make your underpants out of cobalt or kobolds?"

"Eh, whatever"

GavJ

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #9 on: April 23, 2012, 10:24:35 am »

embark on alligator. Feed on alligator that was crushed by wagon, OH WAIT WAGONS ARE NPCS AND CAN'T CRUSH THINGS.

This game... Fml.
Only caravan wagons are NPCs.  Your embark wagon is a building, just like the carpenter's shop or whatever, and presumably is not allowed to be built on a creature any more than that is allowed normally.
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Cauliflower Labs – Geologically realistic world generator devblog

Dwarf fortress in 50 words: You start with seven alcoholic, manic-depressive dwarves. You build a fortress in the wilderness where EVERYTHING tries to kill you, including your own dwarves. Usually, your chief imports are immigrants, beer, and optimism. Your chief exports are misery, limestone violins, forest fires, elf tallow soap, and carved kitten bone.

SRD

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #10 on: April 23, 2012, 10:33:28 am »

O Rly. 



Still, fml.
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

FrisianDude

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #11 on: April 23, 2012, 11:00:57 am »

Fml.
You can't seriously say 'fuck my life' just because a pixel or ascii representation of an alligator ate your seven pixel/ascii representations of Dwarfs.  :P
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A tiny, foul-tempered humanoid creature that dwells in the evil mountains. They are known to enjoy drinking liquor and will take any unguarded supplies of booze.

SRD

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #12 on: April 23, 2012, 11:55:41 am »

It took me like 59 hours to randomly generate names to find a good one then BAM death
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

GavJ

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #13 on: April 23, 2012, 11:57:29 am »

It took me like 59 hours to randomly generate names to find a good one then BAM death
A name which you can now manually type in on your next fort =)
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Cauliflower Labs – Geologically realistic world generator devblog

Dwarf fortress in 50 words: You start with seven alcoholic, manic-depressive dwarves. You build a fortress in the wilderness where EVERYTHING tries to kill you, including your own dwarves. Usually, your chief imports are immigrants, beer, and optimism. Your chief exports are misery, limestone violins, forest fires, elf tallow soap, and carved kitten bone.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Shortest fort
« Reply #14 on: April 23, 2012, 12:14:26 pm »

Fml.
You can't seriously say 'fuck my life' just because a pixel or ascii representation of an alligator ate your seven pixel/ascii representations of Dwarfs.  :P
Why not? :P
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