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[lawastooshort]

"Chaps! We've got contact! Battlestations!"

Rush out of the building (on the ground floor) in the direction of the source of the yelling, taking care not to be seen by the source of the yelling, and then look for some kind of cover where I might be able to hide in preparation for some kind of ambush.

[Dermonster]

Grab that bottle, christen it as my Death-Drink. Get to the front of the inn and fortify the door.

[micelus]

Hide around a corner/cargo/whatever and try to find out who they are.

[Sinpwn]

Take up position next to the now shattered window and prepare to rain explosives down on any advancing Nazis. It's our booze now!

[BullDog]

Help Derm, then quickly look around around for anything of use before heading to the front to help fortify the area.

[Gatleos]

Combat, yay! Let me know if you have any questions about the system.
Turn 3 - Roboviolence

Rush out of the building (on the ground floor) in the direction of the source of the yelling, taking care not to be seen by the source of the yelling, and then look for some kind of cover where I might be able to hide in preparation for some kind of ambush.

(...) You don't have time for subversion! You need to KILL

"We've got contact! Battlestations!"
You swing up on to the roof of the tavern using the window frame, then look down on a group of three Nazi guards running down the street toward the front of the tavern. You leap wildly off the roof and drop down on the unsuspecting Germans! (ATT) (DEF)
"Was zur Hölle?!"
The Nazi jumps out of the way and all three pull small pistols on you!
Just then, you hear a familiar voice above: "'Oy, Hilda! Make yer'self scarce!"

Grab that bottle, christen it as my Death-Drink. Get to the front of the inn and fortify the door.

(...) You grab the drink, run out of the storeroom and tumble down the stairs! You seem to be alright, if a bit sore.

Hide around a corner/cargo/whatever and try to find out who they are.

(...) You quickly duck behind a nearby barrel. They look like members of the Royal Nazi Guard, making their rounds at the edge of the fortress. Suddenly Hilda drops down from the roof, screaming!

Take up position next to the now shattered window and prepare to rain explosives down on any advancing Nazis. It's our booze now!

Hilda's voice comes down the stairs: "We've got contact! Battlestations!" You know that tone. Hilda's about to do something rash. You shove Zack aside, bound up the stairs and climb out the window after Hilda, but you're too late! She flings herself over the edge of the roof toward the enemies below! You approach the edge of the roof to find Hilda held at gunpoint by three Nazi Guards.
"'Oy, Hilda! Make yer'self scarce!"
The Nazi Guards look up at you, temporarily distracted. Hilda makes a mighty leap to the side, and you fire off a packet of plastic explosive at the group of guards!
(ATT) (DEF)
All three of the guards backflip away from the path of the projectile, their spring-loaded mechanical legs propelling them through the air away from the explosion! They all crash to the ground nearby, stunned but unharmed.

Help Derm, then quickly look around around for anything of use before heading to the front to help fortify the area.

(...) "Come on, Derm, we need to fortify the front door!"
Derm grunts, runs out of the storeroom without a word, and tumbles down the stairs. Deciding to leave him be, you run out of the storeroom and... tumble down the stairs.

Status
Player: lawastooshort
Name: Hilda J Gherkin PhD (Agent Rouge)
Bio
Location: Outside the tavern
Inventory: A large wrench | Sexy Catsuit | Radio | Pain-Poms
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Misc. Object Usage | One-Two Punch
Player: BullDog
Name: Zack (Agent Amber)
Bio
Location: Tavern cellar
Inventory: Healing herbs | White Robes | Bandages | Bottle of Booze
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: First Aid
Player: dermonster
Name: Derm (Agent Fuchsia)
Bio
Location: Tavern cellar
Inventory: Tome of Eldritch Lore | Black Robes | Ritual Dagger | Booze Bottle
Wounds: [HP:98/100] | Head Bump | Light Bleeding
Skills: Necromancy | Raise Minion
Player: Sinpwn
Name: Fekod "The Master Explodinator" (Agent Pewter)
Bio
Location: Tavern roof
Inventory: Old Faithful | Plastic Explosives x2 | Funky Hat | Leather Trench Coat | Eye Patch | Tabasco Sauce | Hard Liquor
Wounds: [HP:100/100] Missing Left Eye
Skills: Explosives Expert
Player: micelus
Name: Baron James Ostal (Agent Heliotrope)
Bio
Location: Outside the tavern
Inventory: Skeleton Key | Balaclava | Cloak | Grappling Hook
Wounds: [HP:93/100] Heavy Bruising | Light Bleeding
Skills: Master Thief

[Dermonster]

Fortify the door- wait this is stupid. Get outside and (pausing to actually find a spell in the book) throw down some necromantic pain!

Let's go with the rapid aging spell! Organs to crust and metal to rust, bring down my necromantic, uh... lust?

There are not many words that rhyme with rust.

[micelus]

Stab em all!

[lawastooshort]

Flee! Run away from the front of the building and down the side until I find an entrance, using acrobatic dodges and leaps. Hopefully I've stretched and warmed up enough. Enter the building and rejoin my comrades!

I don't want any necromantic or explosive pain.

[Dermonster]

My history lends me to be slightly indiscriminate.

Hopefully the catchphrase 'Dammit Derm!' catches on here too.

Oh goddamnit this isn't the discussion thread. At a glance the titles are really similar >.>

[Sinpwn]

Shoot another explosive, aiming slightly begin the group of robots.

[BullDog]

Find a weapon, then try to help Hilda get back inside, making sure to stay away from Derm.

[Gatleos]

...Dammit Derm.
Turn 4 - Rise of The Technomorphs

Fortify the door- wait this is stupid. Get outside and (pausing to actually find a spell in the book) throw down some necromantic pain!

(...) You run upstairs and outside to join the others. The skies darken and your eyes gleam red as you read passages from Deus Mortuorum Liber. Dark necromantic energy swirls around you as you chant incoherently, your eyes rolling into the back of your head...

Stab em all!

(ATT) (DEF) You leap at the Nazi-cyborgs with your bladed weapon raised! Too late do you realize that you do not in fact possess a bladed weapon. You weakly toss your grappling hook at the Nazis and watch it bounce off ineffectively.

Flee! Run away from the front of the building and down the side until I find an entrance, using acrobatic dodges and leaps. Hopefully I've stretched and warmed up enough. Enter the building and rejoin my comrades!

(...) Around the building you go, backflipping your way up the street and through the front door of the tavern. You're (relatively) safe! You hear an explosion outside, followed by a terrifying screech.

Shoot another explosive, aiming slightly begin the group of robots.

(ATT) (DEF) (DEF) (DEF) You try aiming above the Nazis, above them, left, right and center, but you eventually decide on aiming begin them. The packet of C4 flies through the air, but again the Nazis jump out of the way with their powerful mechanical legs... except one who totally jumps right into it and is blown apart by the explosion!

Find a weapon, then try to help Hilda get back inside, making sure to stay away from Derm.

(...) You try to follow Derm up the stairs, but slip and tumble back down.


...The mutilated corpse of the Nazi Royal Guardsman twitches and then begins to convulse. As James runs screaming in the other direction, the other two Guardsmen are sucked violently toward the animated corpse! Their bodies blow apart and their bones are shredded as they meld together. Muscle tissue intertwines and skin stretches sickeningly, and at last a towering, soulless monolith of flesh and bone rises from the horrific mess.

Six hydraulic legs sprout from its underside, and a lopsided, bone-filled mouth rips forth from its bloated body, emanating a bone-chilling screech! The monstrosity charges blindly forward, fueled by blind, nameless rage!

Status
Player: lawastooshort
Name: Hilda J Gherkin PhD (Agent Rouge)
Bio
Location: Tavern front room
Inventory: A large wrench | Sexy Catsuit | Radio | Pain-Poms
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: Misc. Object Usage | One-Two Punch
Player: BullDog
Name: Zack (Agent Amber)
Bio
Location: Tavern cellar
Inventory: Healing herbs | White Robes | Bandages | Bottle of Booze
Wounds: [HP:100/100]
Skills: First Aid
Player: dermonster
Name: Derm (Agent Fuchsia)
Bio
Location: Outside the tavern
Inventory: Tome of Eldritch Lore | Black Robes | Ritual Dagger | Booze Bottle
Wounds: [HP:97/100] | Head Bump | Light Bleeding
Skills: Necromancy | Raise Minion | Morph Undead
Player: Sinpwn
Name: Fekod "The Master Explodinator" (Agent Pewter)
Bio
Location: Tavern roof
Inventory: Old Faithful | Plastic Explosives x1 | Funky Hat | Leather Trench Coat | Eye Patch | Tabasco Sauce | Hard Liquor
Wounds: [HP:100/100] Missing Left Eye
Skills: Explosives Expert
Player: micelus
Name: Baron James Ostal (Agent Heliotrope)
Bio
Location: Outside the tavern
Inventory: Skeleton Key | Balaclava | Cloak | Grappling Hook
Wounds: [HP:92/100] Heavy Bruising | Light Bleeding
Skills: Master Thief

[Dermonster]

Tame the beast.

[lawastooshort]

Flee! To the back of the building, near an exit. Search for some music on the radio and perform my post-fleeing warm-down and stretch routine with my pain-poms.

Hopefully I won't find out what that terrible screech was! Dammit whoever was responsible!