Have nobles complaining that their rooms are too cold? No worries, as soon as you link them up to your magma reservoir! They'll never again have to worry about the draft when you install my patented Dwarven Central Heating System! Now with an elaborate airlock system, because it wouldn't do to have those commoners enjoying the luxury of magma-heated floors. When your noble grows tired of the DCHS, it is a simple matter to drain off the magma to the attached reservoir for disposal (or recycling, if you're into elfy things like that). The DCHS is sure to please even the pickiest, mandatiest of nobles! Yours for only the price of the iron furniture (and, to really give it that industrious feel, throw in an ironwood bed too)! Only while supplies last!
Maybe your mayor is tired of being covered with the blood of a thousand sieges. In that case, don't send them all the way to the well for cleaning! Instead, bring the bath to them! The Dwarven Bath-In-Your-Room is guaranteed to make sure that your nobles never have to worry about being dirty again! Just a few screw pumps, a door, a floodgate or two, a hatch cover, and some mechanisms, and you too can have the DBIYR for your nobles! Be sure to lock the door when using the DBIYR, so that none of your lesser dwarves grow jealous of the luxury your deserving nobles have access to. Afterwards, all the water can easily be collected for treatment. Buy yours today!
You can see how much my mayor enjoyed it! I only switched it on for a second, but he raved for a week about how much he "enjoyed a fine bath recently!"
So, anyone else have ways of "treating" their nobles? Please share!