The ERE treachery has annoyed me, and now i have to wipe someone out to feel better.
And since i'm a just ruler and good neighbor, Vandals are getting it once again.
They have made the arch-RETARDED decision to stack most of their generals in one army.
A general-hunt is in order.
There goes one.
Two..
That's three...
..and then They pull out some more voodoo shit and pull the remaining two out.
Still, it's three less, and another annoying stack slightly trimmed down. Now to take the pathetic village..
..and convert it into Christianity, just because i can. (actually it was already Christian, thanks to our 70% conversion general)
I still have some moves left, and there are more Vandals in range, thus...
..we pull some ballsy cornering charge..
..and get rid of another thousand unwashed barbarians. I swear, Vandals are so far the most pathetic opponent. I'm no wonder surprised that Goths held them off. Now i'm surprised the Goths haven't wiped them all out..
Still, some of my soldier got hurt while effortlessly slaughtering dozens of Vandals (they tripped on enemy bodies, got paper cuts and so on..) so i pull my army back to Aquincum to regroup. Vandals got like 1,5 stack left, so we don't care about them for now.
I hit end turn..
..And shit hits the fan.
"But they are pathetic, only 250 general cav, you have plenty of troops" You say.
Aye, we do. But we have only town watch, archers, unwashed mercenaries and one general.
Then again.. we know how to climb.
AND we know how to set up traps. Notice the 49 strong enemy general chasing ours right next to our unbreakable defensive line.
Line that has plenty of javelins to toss, and only one target : THE FOOL. By the time he clashed with my general, his troops were cut down to half, wavering and about to pick up the soap with my general standing behind with just a towel cowering his body.
They got balls though. They are stupid, but they have balls.
See how their general is holding his ground against our line?
Time to change it with a charge of warcry-affected mercs on both flanks. One of them is ought to break.. and it does.
With one routing unit, another ones are just around the corner, and so a chain reaction begins.
Will their king get away?
He would have, but one of our mercenaries is called...
As always, a chain rout coupled with general's death means one thing. Peanut Butter Slaughter Time.
Burgundii bodies make a fine carpet, you should try them out yourself, viewer.
They really should've headed east. I wouldn't bother chasing this tribe across some wastelands.
Was that it? Can i have my turn already?
Hmm.. i guess not.
That's quite a lot of enemies, so i form a flexible formation. No strong points just yet, ready to correct it as soon as i see enemy positions.
Damn ERE got the first attack in this war, but what is this..?
Ah.. hahaha...
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (aka : Le complete annihilation of enemy army)
Oh, hey, They've arrived!
Too bad that the majority of my forces have remained on the starting positions.
A double shame, that the enemy reinforcements arrive right next to our ready and eager troops.
The battle was won before it even began. Poor organization on enemy part.
Reminds me of..
Adrianople.. Should Valens wait for reinforcements under Adrianople, They would've won.
Hell, the date is just half a year away! What a coincidence!
Then again, if they arrived simultaneously, i would still crush them beneath my inquisitorial boot!
Let's see the scoreboa--- WHAT THE---!? How is that NOT a crushing victory!?
Am i having a nightmare?!