[Girl] who cried wolf:
Ok there legitimately is a problem with many feminists thinking that all or at least way too damn many men are sexist bastards. Don't get me wrong, people in general ARE bastards and men only want one thing from women as a general, overarching rule (and you damn well know it).
Yes, sometimes people who aren't sexists get drug into it. If feminists seem to be on a witchhunt for sexism it isn't because they're being assholes, but because sexism is incredibly difficult to find. It isn't incredibly difficult to find because it doesn't exist, but because people are smart enough to hide it. The people hiding it blend in with the people who aren't sexist and it's often impossible to locate them.
Why feminists often get pissed off at men who probably aren't sexists:
1.) Remember that "incredibly difficult to find because people hide it," thing about sexism? Yeah, many men will react to a woman pointing out what she might really think is sexism with "o that's not sexism [no explanation why]" To her it seems like you're blowing her off.
2.) Many men are unconsciously sexist, don't realize they are, or even mean to do it.
Think about all the names guys use as insults that are feminine. Feminine names as insults obviously piss off women, even though they might not tell you.
"Pansy, pussy, "_____ like a girl," "doesn't have the testicular fortitude," "grow some balls," "____________ little bitch," and a million others. You really want me to go on, cause I totally could?
He might be entirely truthful when he says "That's not what I meant." He wasn't trying to put down women, but of course he kinda did do that.... It isn't hard to connect the dots; even though he quite literally might not have intended to do so.
In fact girls sometimes use these names, because it is actually that deeply rooted in our culture, which is why we don't even notice, which is my entire point....
How I have every right to comment:
God knows it's a terrible idea to admit this in our society, especially on the internet, but I'm transsexual, MtF. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to transition at all, in large part because my family truly and honestly believes that gay people are pedophiles....
Other people are often little better. My boss once brought me to jail to get a client. Said jackass look one look at me and said, "get that filthy fuckin' hippie away from me." Keep in mind, I was wearing black slacks with accentuating off white pin stripes, jacket, tie, full on professional veneer in a three piece suit. what was he upset about? I had shoulder length hair tied back in a pony tail tucked into my shirt collar so you couldn't even see it.... This guy was facing serious jail time, so naturally he should worry about how his lawyer looks instead of ... O I dunno, if he can do the job....
My mind also immediately sprung to, but did not say, "Book by it's cover asshole? Really? Maybe it's the jailcell, or the jumpsuit but you look guilty staring out at me from behind bars if we're keeping score like that. I happen to be the only one in this whole damn police station who thinks you MIGHT not have done it. How smart is it to piss me off?"
Basically, if you don't look like a ken doll as a lawyer, especially a new one, people will not hire you. How many transsexual lawyers have you seen? Exactly....
As for my personal experiences regarding feminists who cry wolf. I'm actually in a unique position here:
I'm closeted, on account of my family might actually murder me if they knew, and being in the legal field it's not like I know how to lie or deceive people right? So basically no one knows until and unless I tell them. This is the whole point.
I've actually had female friends who accused me of being sexist over stupid shit, BEFORE I TOLD THEM.... After they found out how I really am and that I actually envy women and need to be one, they changed their tune quite a bit....
That said, I've seen it from both sides. Fact of the matter is men tend to say,
"Ok, maybe there's some sexism out there" but every single example of sexism seems to be met with denial.... Isn't that just a tad funny? "It's out there," but the immediate response to any possible example of sexism is "na." <------- This arrow isn't big enough to show this is the point.
As for me being trans, that's a whole 'nother can of worms, but suffice it to say, I just should've been a girl. If you don't get that, would me trying to explain that to you really matter?
It just pisses me off that:
I can say all the right things, for all the right reasons, at all the right times, in all the right ways, to all the right people, to get all the right results, but ... I'm wrong because I'm trans: not acceptable, employable, friendworthy, or otherwise allowed as such unless I live a lovely lie.... People just, "prefer not to" when it comes to being around trans people, which means we can't be part of society....Fuuuuuuuuck....
If this is like many of the other forms I've visited, you may now proceed to flood my inbox with hate mail. I'll promptly delete it.
@ Vector, thank you for being sensitive to transphobia.
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Topic: Chill and Relaxed Progressive Irritation and Annoyance Thread (Read 857709 times)