Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[GhostDwemer]

So my latest map has a lot of kaolinite, and I had been playing some Civ V (blech) and I saw they had a porcelain pagoda wonder. So I started building that. Boring. Then I re-watched an old Saturday Night Live. Anyone seen the "Porcelain Fountains" and the "Marble Columns" fake commercial sketches with Scarlett Johansson? Hehe. My map has some marble too, so I'm going to do BOTH porcelain fountains AND marble columns!

Nothing says "I'm a Noble like PORCELAIN FOUNTAINS."
You put a porcelain fountain in ya fortress people are gonna say “What is this, a mountainhome?” I’m telling ya! Ya gotta get’chaself some PORCELAIN FOUNTAINS.
If you order one of these things you got nothing to worry about. I come to you. I load up the wagon with the pipes and the wooden corkscrews and the porcelain blocks and I come to you. If you experience any problems with piping or drowning of your entire fortress or your framerate just call and I come to you. Don’t like where we installed your fountain just call and I come to you.
I come to you.

There's no way to get an actual jet of water shooting up, right? But I can make a pump stack inside a porcelain sculpture. I believe I've got it! My first megaproject! A giant sculpture of a dwarf, shielding his eyes from the sun, endlessly vomiting water.

[Necro910]

There's no way to get an actual jet of water shooting up, right? But I can make a pump stack inside a porcelain sculpture. I believe I've got it! My first megaproject! A giant sculpture of a dwarf, shielding his eyes from the sun, endlessly vomiting water.

Insufficient amount of magma. Recalculating...

Replace the water with magma.

[GhostDwemer]

Well, the fortress is already plumbed for magma, but I don't think porcelain is magma safe. I haven't tested it, but it uses the STONE_TEMPLATE without modifying the default temperature of 11500.

[GhostDwemer]

Hrm, duh, constructed walls and floors won't melt even if they aren't magma safe, right? I could do it!

[Necro910]

Hrm, duh, constructed walls and floors won't melt even if they aren't magma safe, right? I could do it!

Pressurize the magma with an external pumpstack (Magma-safe) and then use the pressure to get the magma up the dorf!

[monk12]

Make sure the dwarf is vomiting into a porcelain throne.

[Necro910]

Make sure the dwarf is vomiting into a porcelain elf's gaping wounds.

Fixed.

[Number4]

I now want my home-toilet to flush with magma.

[Dorf3000]

I now want my home-toilet to flush with magma.

Now with 100% more fatal splashback. 

[Urist Imiknorris]

And just imagine the burning smell...

[Niccolo]

But you know it'd be sanitary.

[xeivous]

But you know it'd be sanitary.

Swirlies would hurt like fuck.

[Niccolo]

But you know it'd be sanitary.

Swirlies would hurt like fuck.

Yeah, and everyone'd have no hair for the rest of eternity.

'Least you'd always be able to tell the newbies - they'd be the only ones buying combs.

[Number4]

I find your lack of dwarfiness disturbing. Pull lever M in the bauxite room, please. Have a nice day.

[Dariush]

...I hate to get offto back ontopic, but I think the following may work (side view):

Code: [Select]

#~__%%.#
#~#.%%_#
#~#_%%.#
#~#.%%_#
#~#_%%.#
#~#.%%_#
#~#_%%.#
#~#.%%_#...........~....#
#~#_%%.#...........~....#
#~#.%%_#...........~....#
#~#_%%.#..........#~#...#
#~####_______%%...#~#...#
#~#############___#~#___#
#~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~#####
This design will only work (if at all) with water.