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[Oliolli]

Get drunk off the free sunshine, then forget he had to choose only one of the two, and kill all the elves.

WWUD if he invented pizza?

[Leperous]

He would claim ownership of the "superbly minced plump helmet pizza" and subsequently leave it lying on the floor in a busy corridor, preferring the taste of raw turtle. As a Baron, he forbade any dwarf to move the pizza; the resulting miasma was largely to blame for the subsequent suicides of 3 stout dwarven soldiers.

What would Urist do if he could go on the internet?

[Jacos]

Go view the Dwarf Fortress website, and then commit suicide when hearing what the next update will be about.

WWUD if he was resurrected as a skeleton as soon as the next update came?

[Niccolo]

Go view the Dwarf Fortress website, and then commit suicide when hearing what the next update will be about.

WWUD if he was resurrected as a skeleton as soon as the next update came?

Try and drink, 'cause screw the necromancer's orders!

Then cry because the booze leaked out between his ribs.

What would Urist do next?

[stabbymcstabstab]

eat the nercromancer for make booze undrinkable

WWUD if he became a necromancer

[Cheveux]

Raise zombie plump helmet man and try to eat them.

WWUD if he ate them?

[stabbymcstabstab]

burp out maisma

WWUD if he burp out maisma all the time and had the skill of the guy form the transporter moives

[Jacos]

Then Urist would.. well.. Urist would burp out more miasma.

WWUD if he was ship wrecked on an unknown island?

[Rowanas]

That's answered every time we start a fort.

WWUD if he could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck could chuck?

[ArKFallen]

Be pissed that he's can't hold an axe.

WWUD if he was the sheriff?

[stabbymcstabstab]

beat every important worker to death with a silver hammer

WWUD if he had to beat himself for bring banned items to trade

[jaxy15]

Start giving himself a severe beatdown, snap his own neck, and then strangle himself to death.

WWUD if it rained barrels of sunshine?

[Farmerbob]

Start giving himself a severe beatdown, snap his own neck, and then strangle himself to death.

WWUD if it rained barrels of sunshine?

Nothing.  It only rains outdoors, and Urist doesn't go outside.

WWUD if he actually went outside?

[stabbymcstabstab]

crawl with a axe in his teeth to cut down some trees or burn a firery death form the sun and sunshine

WWUD if he burned to death form the sun

[Sugata-senpai]

Come back as a berserk ghost that would attempt to beat up the sun, and then, burn to death.

WWUD if he was given an artifact green glass short sword, and told to got out and defeat a siege of 80 elven bowman.