Rage of the Greeks
With that out of the way, we can return to the more important matters at hand.
Being Greek.
Sadly, some barbarians had decided to inflict a horrible plague on Thessalonica, which you would undoubtedly remember was in our hands.
I wonder who could have done it?
The valiant Greeks in Thermon had more to worry about than a plague (Unless it was brought by the Romans, in which case they should worry very much.)
The Roman army besieging it had finally mustered up the courage to attack. They sent their rams against the walls, battering them down. Their cavalry charged into the gap, ready to loot, pillage and burn. All that stood in their way were 71 men. However, they were 71 Greeks.
Bravely they were held off. Several more holes were battered in the walls, but still none of their soldiers could long endure the wrath of our warriors!
Even fighting against peltasts in hand-to-hand combat they could not stand for long.
The battle was over, the enemy fleeing as quickly as they had arrived.
Come mighty Greeks! Against enemies as weak as these we cannot falter! Soon the entire civilized world will be under our sway!
Wait. What happened? Have, have Messana and Pergamum really fallen to the barbarian hordes? Is it even possible?
I've, I've got to go lie down.
(Somehow I accidentally saved after autocalcing those battles. I was probably trying to quit while the barbarians were doing their turns. Saving must have been a reflex action.)
Enough said.
(Not even Spartan hopilites can hold walls. I am sad.[Seriously, they lost 20~ guys to some peltasts! My peltasts could barely kill 20 Romans when they were on the walls.])
With Athens persuaded to join us, hopefully we can avenge our fallen comrades.
And perhaps earn a little money while doing so.
Pwnzerfaust could not helplessly let the enemy loot and plunder Messana. He assembled an army to engage these possibly plague-filled barbarians. Like all barbarians, these Romans breed like rabbits, and they landed another army to oppose Pwnzerfaust.
The battlefield looked promising for Pwnzerfaust's intentions. He assembled his phalanxes along a line, with adwarf's archers behind them. The battles of Lilybaeum had shown Pwnzerfaust the strength of archers, and properly supported from cavalry, he expected them to win this battle.
Patiently he waited for the Romans, waiting for them to foolishly engage him piecemeal. The pride of the Romans was such that they would not wait for reinforcements, but instead charge forward, aiming to win personal glory for themselves. The Roman relief force spotted Pwnzerfaust, and showed their lack of intelligence. They were met with a shower of arrows.
The enemy general charged forward into the hoplite line. He was quickly repulsed and killed.
The Romans that were holed up in Messana had entered arrow range, and adwarf directed his archers to fire.
Among the Romans were even more barbaric barbarians. Auxiliaries, they called them.
Perhaps the Romans thought that they weren't prideful and eager enough. Whatever it was, Pwnzerfaust dashed their intentions by personally charging into the midst of the enemy. Spread out as they were, it soon became a slaughter.
Pwnzerfaust and adwarf could not help but grin at such an easy and noble victory.
Right. I'm back. What did I miss?
Damn it. Aren't the Romans happy with Messana?
Thankfully, the gods themselves came to our aid, striking the Romans down with an earthquake.
In their confused state, the mere suggestion of an attack was enough to send them running.
Pwnzerfaust had decided to breach the gates of Messana.
The Romans sacrificed their lives in a futile attempt to retain control of the city.
I spit on their corpses.
Boski was inspired by Pwnzerfaust's victory, and soon arranged to disembark in Asia Minor, to show Pontus that Greece is not to be trifled with. But first, Pergamum must be liberated!
The vile country of Pontus had clearly underestimated us. They left only one of their family members and some frightened recruits to protect the city.
KaguroDraven's Spartans proved their skills and zeal, bashing down the gate and leaping upon the enemy infantry, killing them left and right.
The Thracians of Sheb had been brought along with this expedition, and they gleefully moved to run down the cowardly enemy. The smell of fear hung thickly in the air.
The enemy general tried to protect the city through a prompt and timely charge. He probably shouldn't have attacked Spartans.
While KaguroDraven hacked his way to the enemy general, Sheb had reached the town square, and met the rest of the enemy.
Seeing that they held a numerical advantage, the enemy conscripts rushed forward to overwhelm the Thracians.
They were cut down quickly, ending the battle.
(In case you haven't realized by now, I'm kinda censoring the battles to be a little more Greek friendly.)