I just had - I don't, one-two weeks where I was struggling with an "earache" that made it painful to swallow, followed by the past 4 days where I spent a day drunk, then a day puking (and I mean 3PM to 3AM), then two in high fever constantly wondering if I was awake or not. Imagine my wierdest dream-thread posts... Sometimes horrible, but usually weirdly mundane stuff.
My... fever nightmare is to solve puzzles. Something I do for fun. I just do it, all night, in my head. If I can do it right, I get to rest. That's the promise. All night - or in this case, day.
I was always hot or cold. That one day I must have made 6(8?) trips to spray myself in the face with cold shower, barf until the well ran dry, then force down some water and spray myself again to take the edge off the damn fever.
I think I'm over it. Food stays down, and my chest is still sore but I put it through hella stomach acid.
But the fevers get to me. Lately (like a month ago who knows) I've been scared of mortality and being forgotten. But these fever dreams, they've certainly forced that out. Hell is to struggle for breath while struggling to solve just one more logic puzzle.
I'm pretty sure I didn't eat for 48 hours. The day after I wasn't barfy but I also wasn't hungry, and I was (sometimes) coherent enough to know that was weird. I sampled thing, starting with your typical mixed veggie cans. I didn't want to taste more water, because I had associated its with the bad day. The veggies stayed down.
The next night was just as cursed with fever, but the food stayed down. Then things were better, I even drove a little bit. I had an obligation today, and I wanted to be ready - also my internet was down.
Today was fine. I got up early to meet the internet guy (local fence work severed a line). I think... I'm pretty sure everything's okay. I explained to my dad's SO this morning and she was super understanding, and let me rest. I'm just glad I know when I'm awake and when I'm asleep, again.
Because I didn't write down yesterday's morning's dreams and yet I remember them annoyingly well. I constantly woke up, in a house that wasn't mine. Over and over. Typical dream stuff.
What worries me is that I remember it so clearly despite trying to forget it.
I remember counting digits on a display, and watching the fronds of a distant tree, and trying to convince myself that it was a dream
and failing.
Perhaps... I'm so used to navigating dreams, at my leisure, that being stuck in one by fever is particularly horrifying.
(Also, was that Covid?? I'm going to go get a test, at least, and sign up for the vaccine. I didn't know diarhea was a symptom until recently)
Author
Topic: Things that made you absolutely terrified today (Read 2020277 times)