Man one of my friends pissed me right the fuck off today.
Have had a shitty last month or so. Moving, stress, yadda yadda, broke my arm.
On Saturday, a friend's cat straight up tried to bite through my "good hand." Punctured it in two places on the meat of my palm, drew a lot of blood for a cat bite. It's nice and puffy and tender now, possibly with a mild infection, so now I have a broken left arm with a hand I can barely use and a tender bitten right hand that hurts to grab anything with. I have known this cat since he was a kitten. He's always been unpredictable, always been a biter but this is the first time he's ever drawn blood on me.
Today, while trying to dab on me in front of some women, my friend goes "Well cats are sensitive to people's energies....."
What a motherfucker. Essentially trying to say say that I karmicly invited this cat to chomp on my hand because I have anger issues, when both my friend and his owner have spent YEARS rough housing and playing with this cat and tempting him to bite people by sticking their hand right in his face then snatching it away when he goes to bite them. Oh the cat also bit another person later that night, through their clothes. Yeah, clearly it's MY FUCKING ENERGY and not THEIR FUCKING TROLL BEHAVIOR that caused this to happen.
I told him fuck you because I knew exactly what he as doing.
It's not the cat bite that has me pissed. It's that my friend of more than 30 years basically a) is a troll b) likes to have fun at my expense so he can try to look cool and clever in front of anything with female sex organs and c) implies that I get what's coming to me because of character flaws.
This is the same friend who, in the last 8 years of our friendship, has regularly crossed the line and almost gotten his ass beaten by me several times for doing so. Last time it was when he, without warning, sack tapped me as a 37 year old man and then acted confused when I literally wanted to rip his head off. I wouldn't have put up with that shit in high school, I don't know why he thinks it would have been acceptable now.
I got his apologies but I'm still pretty steamed about it. I got bit by a cat that he's trained over the years to bite the shit out of people, and he tries to somehow blame it on me like I karmicly invited it to happen AND to score points with females. Even if he was "joking" which he actually wasn't, it still wouldn't be funny. Why do some people only seem to be able to have fun at someone else's expense.