The backstory. I am some shy, socially awkward high school student that no one has any good reason to care about. I have had Paranoid Schizophrenia for over a year now but let it get worse over the course of 6 months without treatment. I have only suffered 1 "mental breakdown" and that was caused because I cannot handle being in a school environment for a long period of time. When I did take a full day of classes I was constantly paranoid, having hallucinations, and suffered from the odd almost-delusion that the guy next to me wanted to kill me. When the breakdown happened I got delusions such as the people around me were Free Masons and were watching my every move, that the FBI was outside my door, ect., I was constantly depressed and seriously considered offing myself. Hallucinations were abundant and paranoia was constant. I could not function at all. Every time I tried to do anything hallucinations would harass me, I would start freaking out because something horrible was going to happen, what this horrible thing was I never knew, but it was going to happen and I was convinced.
I've had severe anxiety issues since 7th grade. When they were at their worst in the beginning I had to live through a half a year of school with the doctors reluctant to say it was a mental problem and I was never treated for it until mid-summer before my 8th grade year. I have to carry around a drink with me constantly as a "safety blanket" and when going to any social outings I have to take an Ativan(Lorazepam)/anti-anxiety pill.
But on a brighter side, in the last few days I have became increasingly social and less shy for absolutely no reason at all. One day I just woke up and started talking to people. This made me wonder, if I got into a relationship with a girl, at what point do I mention that I my reality isn't the same as hers or anyone elses. That I live in a world where I can turn the corner and my worst nightmare is staring me in the face or a friendly talking tree wants to hug me.
I figure that my anxiety can be explained very early on, before I even get into a relationship. But what do I say about my Schizophrenia. I don't want to scare them away but I feel that they need to know because, for example, today I almost told a girl I was talking to that the fire hydrant running around was kind of scary. I caught myself before I said anything luckily enough.
I have been told I need to keep it as a secret for as long as possible and I have been told to tell them as soon as I get into the relationship. Oh, and I know that high school relationships don't matter but I think it would be good practice and it would really help me out mentally, well maybe not the breakup, but I will have to learn to deal with that either way. And I guess this question could apply in real-world relationships because mental illnesses are a very serious matter.
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Topic: At what point in a relationship do I say "I have serious mental problems" (Read 4596 times)