Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Tawa]

Indeed. I remember you making a kid's book that was pretty awesome to read. Hell, do a webcomic and I bet you'd get loads of people.

Oh yeah, I remember that. The QUEST for the FACEONOMICON.

'Twas funny.

[ChairmanPoo]

meh. stupid presentation work.

[Descan]

What's behind the "have to" then? You're not being paid for it, they've been fired, I don't get the compulsion.

[JoshuaFH]

I still have this roiling sense of dread inside of me.

I had given my Mom the one standing order to ignore calls from my Shrink's place, but she not only doesn't ignore it but then hands me the phone. You stupid cunt, in what language do I have to speak to you.

Now I'm suddenly thrust into this situation, BADLY exhausted from a lack of sleep, being asked if I wanted to reschedule or not. Here I am, now desperately piecing together the memory in my addled head, to articulate the words as to why I've avoided rescheduling. The only thing I could say was that I felt our last session 'didn't go so well', which is about as lame as anything.

I mentioned that I'll think about it, and he informs me that not rescheduling in 30 days will close my case, and that I should 'think very carefully' before that happens. Now I am sick with worry, if only a bit. I am unsure in which direction to go now, as it's something that has, for the last week or so been on my mind, in the back of my head, making me worried, and this has exacerbated it not inconsiderably.

But for now, I must sleep. I am quite deprived.

[Graknorke]

Whelp, back into the schedule of doing important stuff early morning instead of at a reasonable hour. GOGO GADGET GOOD-ENOUGH-JOB.

EDIT: Okay maybe I just won't do it at all. Fuck it, they can deal. No way I can actually do this and understand what I'm doing. Finding roots of imaginary numbers and stuff is tedious and dull and not at all necessary to make me do 20 fucking times.

[Fniff]

Gods no don't do a webcomic. The internet is barely over the Penny Arcade imitator "gold"rush. You should probably leave any webcomicing for a few years...decades... actually maybe it won't ever go away.

I thought that was over for a while.

[Vector]

.

[Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum]

I went to school to pick up my bus pass, and my guidance counselor asked to talk to me. So I went into her office, and she started yelling about how I was making a horrible mistake by deciding to change schools, and then she started ranting about my schedule...
I had already made up my mind, the new school seems much better for me and I don't even have to go there if I don't want to because all their stuff is online. The only reason I would go is to talk with the teachers there for extra help, and they also do online video chat things. It just sounds so much better for me in every way, and my therapist recommended I go there, and I have friends who went there for years and loved it.
But she still felt the need to shout at me, so I just wanted to leave and cry... So I cleaned out my locker, returned my textbooks and dropped the school. My English teacher and the librarian were glad I found somewhere better, and I didn't see any of my other teachers... But now my old English teacher has a class of 6 people, 2 who are always on YouTube and one who never shows up because drugs.

[Bohandas]

Indeed. I remember you making a kid's book that was pretty awesome to read. Hell, do a webcomic and I bet you'd get loads of people.

Oh yeah, I remember that. The QUEST for the FACEONOMICON.

'Twas funny.

I'd buy it if it wasn't too expensive.

[ggamer]

Indeed. I remember you making a kid's book that was pretty awesome to read. Hell, do a webcomic and I bet you'd get loads of people.

Oh yeah, I remember that. The QUEST for the FACEONOMICON.

'Twas funny.

I'd buy it if it wasn't too expensive.

I'd buy the shit outta a hamstone book if shook would make it

[Yoink]

I'm still sad that I never got my Hatebomb shirt.

[Bauglir]

How do you get a doctorate in psychology and still think everyone else thinks the same way as you?

He doesn't have a doctorate in psychology, just a master's, and though he's licensed he's still in training *shrug*


EDIT to add: The decision to transition is indisputably the right one, but now I'm scared that it won't work and no matter how hard I try, no one will ever love me the way I want them to, or see me for who I really am. I'm scared of a repeat of yesterday, which is pretty much guaranteed to happen over and over and over again. I'm scared that my mom will reject me. The probability of my father doing so is almost certain. Mom wanted me to be pretty, and my dad's creepy enforcement of the gender binary infuriates me.

This sucks, and I'm really fucking lonely because I don't trust any of my friends enough to talk to them about it yet. I know what I want. I also know that I'm surrounded by the sorts of people who are going to keep fucking this up and not having any goddamn understanding of why it matters.

All of my excitement suddenly turned into hella yuck. With every step forward, I keep remembering why I never took any steps forward in the first place. I feel a sort of hollow despair when I think about the life I'll lead without doing this, but there's that constant fear... that it won't work, and that I should expect poor treatment because that's pretty much what I've gotten most of the time anyhow.

I know it's not quite the same online, if only because forum posting makes it difficult to convey that sense of casual support that goes a long way towards validation. Tough to suggest a perspective without saying it, when all you can do is say things. But who you are is (from my perspective), first and foremost, really damn cool. I have no reason to believe that anything that makes you who you are is anything but good. Your identity is a good one, and it doesn't need to be justified by comparison to a standard. It made you you, and anything that does that has to be pretty fucking incredible. And while the inevitable filtering that happens through the Internet means I may never know who you really are (because I can only see a dim reflection), I can say that I care about you, I appreciate everything you've done for me (however little of it was aimed directly at me), and above all else I hope your life comes to include the freedom to express as much of yourself as you want, and hold back as much as you want - whether that's everything, nothing at all, or anything in between. That's as much love as anything I've ever felt, I s'pose.

And I'm not just talking to Vector, here. Keep on being awesome, Bay12.

[penguinofhonor]

.

[Eric Blank]

Miserably sick. Doctor says I just have a sinus infection. Fucking nuts for a sinus infection if you ask me, but he's the medicine man so...

[Yoink]

Seeing my cat for the first time in a while (he lives with my mother) and he's all scabby from his flea allergies.