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[Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum]

I could introduce you to a few others out there

*Kal waves!

So, the last time I went to my therapist, I told her that my dad goes on business trips quite often, and she asked me how I liked being the man of the house... I told her my little sister was manlier than me (Which is true, she's quite a tomboy) and my therapist just laughed. Then I spent the rest of the meeting telling stories about my little sister... Not that helpful for me, but whatever.

It's kind of annoying how many people expect me to be super manly and stuff. I mean, only two people refer to me as "she" IRL, my girlfriend and my trans friend... And everyone else is like "Kal, you need to go play sports and chase girls and drive cars!" Which is both really odd, and annoying.

Also, people make fun of me for bowing when I say thank you, and because I hug people when they give me a gift... Why is that anything to make fun of? People are mean.

[Tiruin]

I still don't quite get what the difference between crush and friend, when not considering anything sexual in the equation.

It's dependent on the person, really
Some judge by physical looks.
Some by personality.
Most, by a mix of all these.

Then its defining what a crush is [ie Appreciation? Attraction? dot dot dot...]

I could introduce you to a few others out there

*Kal waves!

So, the last time I went to my therapist, I told her that my dad goes on business trips quite often, and she asked me how I liked being the man of the house... I told her my little sister was manlier than me (Which is true, she's quite a tomboy) and my therapist just laughed. Then I spent the rest of the meeting telling stories about my little sister... Not that helpful for me, but whatever.

It's kind of annoying how many people expect me to be super manly and stuff. I mean, only two people refer to me as "she" IRL, my girlfriend and my trans friend... And everyone else is like "Kal, you need to go play sports and chase girls and drive cars!" Which is both really odd, and annoying.

Also, people make fun of me for bowing when I say thank you, and because I hug people when they give me a gift... Why is that anything to make fun of? People are mean.

Maybe you may be taking your Therapist laughing in a negative way, given the past experiences mentioned above? She could just be laughing in...um, humoring the idea? Anything not-bad anyway. ^{I think you should've just asked 'why did you laugh? :O'}
Also take it in stride--what you do is ok. Nothing bad with it c:
^{I would be linking the idea of societal constructs as to gender but I'm unsure if it actually applies. Anyway, the second paragraph seemingly relates to the very old idea of rigidity of masculinity
Very. Old. Idea. Which is pretty much overwritten by modern ideology.}

[Solifuge]

I still don't quite get what the difference between crush and friend, when not considering anything sexual in the equation.

Honestly, it's hard to classify Friendship or Love as different, but there's some Greek words that help me think about them in better detail:
= Agape: "Good Will" love. Felt towards people we empathize with, wish well upon, or seek to help. Charity or unconditional love.
= Philia/Storge: "Trust/Closeness" love. Felt towards people we are comfortable, familiar, and open with, such as friends or family. Comradery and playfulness.
= Eros: "I want to do kissy things with and/or get into this person's pants" love. Felt toward people we admire or find beautiful. Attraction or infatuation.

When these forms of love are one sided or unspoken, they're Crushes (Eros), and whatever the one-sided version of Agape and Philia would be called... Charity and Admiration? When they exist between two people, they create Romances (Eros), Friendships (Philia), and other relationships that are separate from either individual's feelings. So, Relationships/Friendships are the actual bond between people, while Crushes/Attraction/Admiration are the feelings at either end.

It's kind of annoying how many people expect me to be super manly and stuff.

Ugh... I don't fit the traditional Male thing either, and I've been in that boat too. I put on a show for everyone when I was young, doing my best to fit "normal guy" behavior and all, but eventually I got sick of the dissonance between my feelings and how I was expected to act. It was a huge relief to throw out those expectations and just be Myself, whatever that involved. Even if it meant dealing with the occasional critical comments, confused or judgmental friends, unwanted advances from gay guys, and homophobic slurs.

It's caused (and still causes) some stress in my life, but my family and close friends learned to deal with it. Over the years, I even taught some of the men in my family and friend circles to be less worried about gender role crap too, hug each other more freely, and feel more comfortable saying unmanly things like "cute" and such. I think it's a win overall. :3

[Shook]

Oh hey, i seem to have fallen into my "i don't know what i want to do with my life and i don't like what's transpiring at the moment" hole again. Supposedly it's a fairly common thing to be unsure of your perceived purpose in this world, but that doesn't make me any less bummed out. I don't even feel like i'm in charge of my own life, despite being legally adult and all that shit. It feels more like others are trying to fit me into an unfitting role without even bothering to think about whether i could be more valuable elsewhere, and at the moment, it feels like my value is only slightly above that of microcline. I probably sound like a crybaby to the lot of you; a pampered child suddenly faced with reality and being unable to deal with the facts of it, but the facts are terrible and i hate the way it's going right now.

And as if that isn't annoying enough to deal with, my sheltered life is pretty much on a timer now, since my parents are going to retire within not too many years. Honestly i wouldn't mind standing on my own legs (provided that i am able to it), but it does raise some issues about residence and such things, since it's NOT easy to find an affordable place in this city, nor is it easy to find a part time job when you're above 18. Yes, you heard that right: It's harder to find part time jobs when you're legally adult. This is because everywhere i've seen a job offer, it's been like "ARE YOU UNDER 18 AND FULL OF ENERGY AND VIGOR? WE WILL GLADLY PAY YOU AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE FOR YOU TO GET YOUR SOUL CRUSHED AT OUR PLACE", which is to say that the minimum wage is much lower when you're below 18, WHICH MEANS that they don't want to even pay minimum wage for adult workers. When you're 18 or above, they want 50 years of experience in a 20 year old body, and i'm sure i don't need to point out how ridiculous a notion that is. (disclaimer: i sadly do understand it from a capitalist pigdog point of view)

Also re: gender issues, i'm glad that i only have minor things like feeling awkward about drawing, wanting to play the violin and generally being VERY emotional. I never was a super macho guy (i have far too many sappy feels for that), but generally i'm okay with being a guy. My heart goes out to those of you who struggle with gender issues every day. :<

[Yoink]

My brother just told me he could bear to listen to an album by Rhianna or Beyonce. I have to live with this cretin.

[Orange Wizard]

My brother just told me he could bear to listen to an album by Rhianna or Beyonce. I have to live with this cretin.

I dunno. "I could bear to" is fairly ambiguous. He might have meant "I could bear to if you paid me two billions", which is much more reasonable.

[Yoink]

Well, in the context I don't think there were any rewards offered for listening to it, nor was he being held at gunpoint.
I'm running low on siblings I actually like.

[hops]

Maybe he's selectively deaf.

[Tack]

Until Vector discovers he was doing it all just to get their trust so he could start working his  brain-magic.

It very much worries me that in order to be treated we need to give all of our trust to these people whilst still being aware that they are humans with hosts of flaws themselves; like aforementioned patriarchal biases.
It's an intriguing dichotomy, to say the least.

[Spehss _]

-snip-

"I don't know what I'm doing with my life" sympathy high five!

[Yoink]

I can't fucking sleep. Lay in bed for hours before giving up, and now I'm feeling hungry so there's even less chance.

[pisskop]

Go drink water.
  Drink until you feel full and then another cup.  Then go lie down and think about how it feels.  Just lay there, feeling the blankets.  Feel the cold lumps of jiggle in your stomach.  Feel it drip into your bladder after sliding through your gut.  Then go pee.

[GiglameshDespair]

Go drink water.
  Drink until you feel full and then another cup.  Then go lie down and think about how it feels.  Just lay there, feeling the blankets.  Feel the cold lumps of jiggle in your stomach.  Feel it drip into your bladder after sliding through your gut.  Then go pee.

...what.

[hector13]

I can't fucking sleep. Lay in bed for hours before giving up, and now I'm feeling hungry so there's even less chance.

I usually get up and do something relaxing (which doesn't involve technology) so my mind shuts off. This is generally reading for an hour or so, and then I go back to bed and can get to sleep. It's not ideal, but better than getting slowly more and more pissed off over the inability to get to sleep. 'Cause that won't help

[pisskop]

Go drink water.
  Drink until you feel full and then another cup.  Then go lie down and think about how it feels.  Just lay there, feeling the blankets.  Feel the cold lumps of jiggle in your stomach.  Feel it drip into your bladder after sliding through your gut.  Then go pee.

...what.

Gotta stop thinking to get to sleep.  And most much hunger is secretly thirst.