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[MaximumZero]

I recommend becoming obsessed with a videogame or television show. Play Skyrim for 400 hours, or maybe watch Taxi Driver 100 times and shoot President Regan's tombstone.

This also may or may not work. Would temporarily distract you, yes, but not completely...what's a term...dull the pain? Fill the void? Cure the crush. Crush the crush.

Well, I'm learning fencing.

Need a sharper rapier though.

Saber FTW.

[Vector]

.

[MaximumZero]

Bill him.

[Bauglir]

He's got his license, yeah... he's not some naive person either. There's sort of some outstanding circumstances in this case so it really doesn't just figure up as his being stupid or uncaring. I still wanna cry, though, just because we literally started the conversation off with "I don't want to talk to you about this stuff because the psychological establishment has had its fingers really deep in sex and gender and has a long tradition of invalidating LGBT experiences."

And then an hour of gently trying to convince me to see myself as a woman ensued.

:< to the therapist.

Spoiler: Ninja'd to irrelevance (click to show/hide)

I'm glad he's been helpful for your PTSD, but I think he may have misdiagnosed the problem here. The problem isn't that you're nonbinary, the problem is that people think that's a problem and that creates stress and suchlike. 'S like... 's like dropping by a physician because you got hit by a car or something and getting told, "Well, the problem is, you had some bones in there to break - let's get in there and take those out and then it won't be causing you any more pain."

Or at least, I think that's what the problem generally is. The actual events and feelings for your case might be totally different, and that's fine (and, indeed, rather the point of this I-should've-been-asleep-an-hour-ago ramble).

EDIT: And hey it totally was different! Oh well, you've won at receiving therapy apparently? Something something to the vector go the spoils something something there has got to be a way to tie this to the "Bill him" suggestion

[Bohandas]

I'm glad he's been helpful for your PTSD, but I think he may have misdiagnosed the problem here. The problem isn't that you're nonbinary, the problem is that people think that's a problem and that creates stress and suchlike. 'S like... 's like dropping by a physician because you got hit by a car or something and getting told, "Well, the problem is, you had some bones in there to break - let's get in there and take those out and then it won't be causing you any more pain."

With a few advances in cybernetics that has the potential to be a perfectly valid course of treatment in the near future.

[MaximumZero]

to the vector go the spoils

Damn you, my kid's asleep. Stop making me laugh.

[Kadzar]

I recommend becoming obsessed with a videogame or television show. Play Skyrim for 400 hours, or maybe watch Taxi Driver 100 times and shoot President Regan's tombstone.

This also may or may not work. Would temporarily distract you, yes, but not completely...what's a term...dull the pain? Fill the void? Cure the crush. Crush the crush.

Yeah, but you don't "cure" crushes, you outlast them. Anything that buys you time is a step in the right direction. Buy enough time, and your brain wanders off to go look at something else.

I'd advocate buying time by doing something more productive than a billion hours of Skyrim.

Ah, who am I kidding. I sank at least a billion hours into that game.

Depending on whether your talking about anatomy or behavior, that's either half or twice as long as modern humans have existed. I think you might be able to be done with Skyrim in that amount of time.

Also, since I was there, I noticed Wikipedia puts humanity's Conservation Status as "Least Concern". I feel like, at the point you need Wikipedia to tell you that, that information is probably either irrelevant or no longer accurate.

[Bohandas]

I recommend becoming obsessed with a videogame or television show. Play Skyrim for 400 hours, or maybe watch Taxi Driver 100 times and shoot President Regan's tombstone.

This also may or may not work. Would temporarily distract you, yes, but not completely...what's a term...dull the pain? Fill the void? Cure the crush. Crush the crush.

Yeah, but you don't "cure" crushes, you outlast them. Anything that buys you time is a step in the right direction. Buy enough time, and your brain wanders off to go look at something else.

I'd advocate buying time by doing something more productive than a billion hours of Skyrim.

Ah, who am I kidding. I sank at least a billion hours into that game.

Depending on whether your talking about anatomy or behavior, that's either half or twice as long as modern humans have existed. I think you might be able to be done with Skyrim in that amount of time.

Also, since I was there, I noticed Wikipedia puts humanity's Conservation Status as "Least Concern". I feel like, at the point you need Wikipedia to tell you that, that information is probably either irrelevant or no longer accurate.

"If you're a researcher on this book thing and you were on Earth, you must have been gathering material on it."
"Well, I was able to extend the original entry a bit, yes."
"Let me see what it says in this edition, then. I've got to see it."
… "What? Harmless! Is that all it's got to say? Harmless! One word! … Well, for God's sake I hope you managed to rectify that a bit."
"Oh yes, well I managed to transmit a new entry off to the editor. He had to trim it a bit, but it's still an improvement."
"And what does it say now?" asked Arthur.
"Mostly harmless," admitted Ford with a slightly embarrassed cough.

[Tiruin]

...we literally started the conversation off with "I don't want to talk to you about this stuff because the psychological establishment has had its fingers really deep in sex and gender and has a long tradition of invalidating LGBT experiences."

And then an hour of gently trying to convince me to see myself as a woman ensued.

Vector, I'll echo that this sounds like shitty therapy. Sorry it happened. I understand he's been a better therapist in the past, so I hope it gets better, or at least doesn't happen again. Good luck.

Thanks.

I had caught him doing that a little bit last time we brought up this subject, so this time I came prepared to fight against the Jungian "actually we are all non-binary beneath all of our cultural education and you are just unusually enlightened compared to most people. Therefore you should see yourself as female on the basis of biological sex because however you want to behave, you can be a woman and still do that. After all, you [a person who has not transitioned and has had no ability to pick their own clothing until recently] appear female to me." thing. So, you know, not nearly terrible as it could be, but not great given that I hadn't even been able to explain that there's more here than not wanting to conform to a stereotype. He also called gender-neutral children "it," which I had to politely inform him was non-preferred.

It turned out that the problem was that his internal identity was androgynous [which I had sort of been sensing for a while], and he just assumed everyone else with a strong sense of binary gender had just drunk too much societal Kool-Aid. By the end, after a brief education in trans* 101 and a few thought experiments, he was acting sheepish and implied he should be paying me for therapy.

So there you go. Vector: helping folks discover that they're trans* by accident.

@_@
Vector?
That isn't the right way of therapy in approaching gender identity (edoot: Oh goodness I meant for HIM and not YOU. You did it right). It seems he's undergoing counter-transference from in relating with your details .__. [By which I mean stating the rigidity of gender--its more dependent on how the person identifies instead of theoretical data in this context]
OR
There are some details which are, in between the lines, unspoken of and may be causing a sort of misunderstanding of association and identification.

Or its his viewpoint. Generally, I assume most therapists perform their duties under the humanistic perspective which generally means 'ask first and establish common ground instead of enforcing ideas on seemingly uncertain ground' ._.

Double edit!
My words are messy like spaghetti
^{Hey thanks Reudh for supporting me back there and teaching me about the finer aspects of my English and saying 'You do English well' in short.}

Sadly, Tir, you tend to have little control over crushes. Your brain just goes 'Hey, look at that person! They look nice! CRUSH!'

Err, not really? (In my opinion anyway). The people I've found as...crushes? Generally had the same attribute.
That, or its my asexuality speaking :v Like, seriously. It's pure personality for me.

[4maskwolf]

It's pure personality for me.

YAY SO I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO THINKS THAT!

* 4maskwolf bops Tiruin

[Spehss _]

Uuuuurgh and now I'm having horrible crushing existential thoughts about how my life seems to be going nowhere and I should just give up.

Wheeeeeeee.

[Xantalos]

True that. Physical appearance may warrant notice but it's general personality that gets people staying.
Hopefully.

Uuuuurgh and now I'm having horrible crushing existential thoughts about how my life seems to be going nowhere and I should just give up.

Wheeeeeeee.

Those happen all the time, go play DF and mutilate a wolf or something distracting like that.

[Tiruin]

That, or its my asexuality speaking :v Like, seriously. It's pure personality for me.

YAY SO I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO THINKS THAT!

* 4maskwolf bops Tiruin

I could introduce you to a few others out there
I mean, really. When I first met her, then I noticed a something in her IRC chat, then we talked about it...then we found MANY MANY SIMILARITIES LIKE WOW. I THOUGHT IT WAS ONLY ME.

I'm being too silly these days.

Uuuuurgh and now I'm having horrible crushing existential thoughts about how my life seems to be going nowhere and I should just give up.

Wheeeeeeee.

When those crushing thoughts come in, interrupt them with non-crushing thoughts.
These happen to me everyday, but its very possible to function under them like they were nothing! \o/
^{When lost at sea, orient thyself by looking around, and looking at yourself.}

And I totally ran out of time to deliver any longer thingy here.

[WillowLuman]

I still don't quite get what the difference between crush and friend, when not considering anything sexual in the equation.

[Orange Wizard]

I guess crush - sex = friend + inexplicable desire to take them on dates.