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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9702251 times)

DJ

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63255 on: June 28, 2013, 02:21:38 am »

I smiled at him and giggled, same as I did when he made the crack about whether I felt the value of my degree had been undercut by the invention of the calculator.
That's your problem right there. If a joke offends you you shouldn't laugh, else people will think you liked it.
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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63256 on: June 28, 2013, 03:23:35 am »

I'm sad because everyone in the DFC Steam chat is being a jerk and calling me a piece of shit for attempting suicide once...  :'(

EDIT: The exact quote was 5:52 AM - Emperor Kennedy II (Xeron): Suicide is an pathetic act ,worthy of disgust and hatred

I'm 3 pages late to this, but I think it's worth pointing out.

I've encountered this sort of reaction to the subject several times.  It is an unacceptable thing to say to someone who is suicidal.  However, sometimes people who say such things are bitter from suffering the suicide of a loved one in their own past.  So I don't think it's right to condemn someone for saying something like this, unless you know them well.
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Bdthemag

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63257 on: June 28, 2013, 04:17:23 am »

I'm sad because everyone in the DFC Steam chat is being a jerk and calling me a piece of shit for attempting suicide once...  :'(

EDIT: The exact quote was 5:52 AM - Emperor Kennedy II (Xeron): Suicide is an pathetic act ,worthy of disgust and hatred

I'm 3 pages late to this, but I think it's worth pointing out.

I've encountered this sort of reaction to the subject several times.  It is an unacceptable thing to say to someone who is suicidal.  However, sometimes people who say such things are bitter from suffering the suicide of a loved one in their own past.  So I don't think it's right to condemn someone for saying something like this, unless you know them well.
Why bring it up in the first place on a video game chat channel? If you bring up something extremely personal like that to a big group of people, and suddenly act surprised when some people are reacting negatively to that, then it's your own fault for bringing it up in the first place.
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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63258 on: June 28, 2013, 05:05:13 am »

I've encountered this sort of reaction to the subject several times.  It is an unacceptable thing to say to someone who is suicidal.  However, sometimes people who say such things are bitter from suffering the suicide of a loved one in their own past.  So I don't think it's right to condemn someone for saying something like this, unless you know them well.

...And how about condemning their response? Seriously, it's possible to think people do shitty things without them being complete monsters. Even if they were hurt by somebody committing suicide in the past, there's no excuse for heaping scorn on somebody for attempting suicide nor should any instance of accepting that environment be tolerated. Telling somebody who has already attempted suicide that they are worthless beings worthy of disgust and hatred is far more important to address than taking into account that somebody might be lashing out due to unresolved personal issues.

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Xantalos

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63259 on: June 28, 2013, 05:08:36 am »

Well, the kitten I got (And have had for a couple months) since my last kitten died (Due to an accident involving leaving my kitten with my mother) appears to have hookworm and heartworm, and possibly feline leukemia. He could survive, if I had $250 a month for expensive medicine, which I frankly can't afford. I'd take him back home too, so he could at least die in somewhere familiar, but I can't do that because I risk him giving my other cat his worms. So my only really option at this point is to have him euthanized at a vet. It's partially my fault, considering I got a kitten without any shots, and partially the originals owners fault for lying to me about his health and age. So yeah, this really fucking sucks.
D:
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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63260 on: June 28, 2013, 05:51:56 am »

I've encountered this sort of reaction to the subject several times.  It is an unacceptable thing to say to someone who is suicidal.  However, sometimes people who say such things are bitter from suffering the suicide of a loved one in their own past.  So I don't think it's right to condemn someone for saying something like this, unless you know them well.

...And how about condemning their response? Seriously, it's possible to think people do shitty things without them being complete monsters. Even if they were hurt by somebody committing suicide in the past, there's no excuse for heaping scorn on somebody for attempting suicide nor should any instance of accepting that environment be tolerated. Telling somebody who has already attempted suicide that they are worthless beings worthy of disgust and hatred is far more important to address than taking into account that somebody might be lashing out due to unresolved personal issues.

You could switch a few words around and be saying the exact same thing from the opposite perspective.  Suicide is a shitty thing to do.  Being hateful towards someone for having attempted it in the past is also a shitty thing to do.  It's a fairly safe bet that both actions are a result of unresolved personal issues.  Both sides would benefit from taking that into account when dealing with each other, and would probably be mutually beneficial to each other if they'd take the time to talk out their perspectives with each other in a more reasonable fashion.  The whole thing feels a bit like picking and choosing which personal issues are deserving of tolerance and sympathy (assuming Xeron's words are an expression of personal issues).

Also, for the sake of optimal fairness.

...And how about condemning their response? Seriously, it's possible to think people do shitty things without them being complete monsters.

Condemn the act and not the person, right?

EDIT: The exact quote was 5:52 AM - Emperor Kennedy II (Xeron): Suicide is an pathetic act ,worthy of disgust and hatred

The quote is presented without much context.  I'm assuming that more stuff happened to produce AlleeCat's reaction than this single quote.  Yet this quote taken at face value is just a condemnation of an act, which is alright by you.
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Glowcat

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63261 on: June 28, 2013, 05:59:42 am »

Condemn the act and not the person, right?

EDIT: The exact quote was 5:52 AM - Emperor Kennedy II (Xeron): Suicide is an pathetic act ,worthy of disgust and hatred

The quote is presented without much context.  I'm assuming that more stuff happened to produce AlleeCat's reaction than this single quote.  Yet this quote taken at face value is just a condemnation of an act, which is alright by you.

There might be more context, but that line communicates loathing for the person for simply being in a state of mind that they felt they should kill themselves. It isn't a coincidence that he uses words like "pathetic", implying a weakness of will, when those are often the arrows used by people who hate the suicidal and heap the blame upon them. Don't try to equivocate his dickery with what a person dealing with issues that actually threaten their lives.

EDIT: And then there's the whole you bringing forth a hypothetical compared to facts (true or untrue, but nobody has claimed falsehood). Why the hell are you inventing histories for this guy to absolve blame?
« Last Edit: June 28, 2013, 06:04:53 am by Glowcat »
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Jopax

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63262 on: June 28, 2013, 06:23:20 am »

Results are in, I failed the exam. Got 41% out of the 50% needed for a pass.

Welp, time to get back to it I guess, other stuff will have to wait :I
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Frumple

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63263 on: June 28, 2013, 06:24:02 am »

EDIT: And then there's the whole you bringing forth a hypothetical compared to facts (true or untrue, but nobody has claimed falsehood). Why the hell are you inventing histories for this guy to absolve blame?
I... think to avoid inventing histories in order to apportion blame? If I'm reading SG right.
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Skyrunner

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63264 on: June 28, 2013, 06:33:21 am »

Just one more hour, then I'm free to head home and live what life I get before 2 pm Saturday.
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Glowcat

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63265 on: June 28, 2013, 06:37:09 am »

EDIT: And then there's the whole you bringing forth a hypothetical compared to facts (true or untrue, but nobody has claimed falsehood). Why the hell are you inventing histories for this guy to absolve blame?
I... think to avoid inventing histories in order to apportion blame? If I'm reading SG right.

I'm reading his argument as the person in question possibly having some experience in his past to make him act that way. I just find it really odd that he feels it necessary to provide possible situations to make us sympathetic with the guy when we have nothing to really base that on.
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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63266 on: June 28, 2013, 06:57:21 am »

Because bringing perspective checks into play when I see emotional judgments taking place is a pet practice of mine, and the possibility of such histories seems relevant.  I wasn't trying to absolve him of blame, either.  Let me rephrase my original statement.

Depression sucks and it sucks that AlleeCat was spoken to that way.  Unfortunately, suicide is really common, and for every one life lost to self-taking, there are many more subjected to hardship and trauma.  Imagine what a kid goes through when their parent commits suicide, essentially abandoning them.  While no one deserves to be lashed out at for having suicidal thoughts, it can be understandable nevertheless and we shouldn't forget that.  Whether it's the case in this instance or not, it's just a good thing to be aware of.  As we can already agree in regards to suicidal thoughts, jumping straight to outrage isn't a good response to unacceptable behaviors that are commonly the result of personal issues.

EDIT: And then there's the whole you bringing forth a hypothetical compared to facts (true or untrue, but nobody has claimed falsehood). Why the hell are you inventing histories for this guy to absolve blame?
I... think to avoid inventing histories in order to apportion blame? If I'm reading SG right.

Yeah, in a sense.  More like assuming the lack of a history.

To ultra-clarify:  I'm not trying to say "I think this is the explanation for Xeron's behavior and we should forgive him."  I'm saying "I've encountered people behaving this way before and had the same reaction you guys did until I realized this bit of perspective that softened my response to that behavior, so I'm throwing it out there because it's something to think about."
« Last Edit: June 28, 2013, 07:03:39 am by SalmonGod »
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
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In the land of twilight

Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

Vector

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63267 on: June 28, 2013, 07:27:22 am »

I smiled at him and giggled, same as I did when he made the crack about whether I felt the value of my degree had been undercut by the invention of the calculator.
That's your problem right there. If a joke offends you you shouldn't laugh, else people will think you liked it.

I was stuck on a bus with this guy after having been in transit/at work for 11 hours straight, and sleep-deprived for the last week.  I wasn't in the greatest shape.
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Glowcat

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63268 on: June 28, 2013, 07:31:07 am »

@SalmonGod

Looking back when it was originally posted I guess some responses were rather... enthusiastic. You might feel that anger is an excessive reaction but it doesn't mean that people aren't conscious that people besides the person committing suicide suffer if they harshly condemn somebody. He could've been hurt in the past, or he could just be one of the many jerks in the world. In either case it should be made clear that the response was unacceptable. I probably read your post a lot worse than it was after the victim-blaming nonsense that followed it.
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Shakerag

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #63269 on: June 28, 2013, 09:20:52 am »

Suicide is a shitty thing to do. 
I am of the opinion that telling someone, who is in chronic pain and has little to no quality of life, that they don't have ownership of their own life is a shitty thing to do. 
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