I think its with what you append to failure. Acknowledge that fear and approach it with a close buddy to test it out--let the buddy rate you, then ask them what they think could be improved upon :O Fear of rejection has its causes--if those causes aren't able to resolved, it would be best to counter what's occurring 
Ask a friend as in, ask them how would they react--extend the 'hypothetical question' to your family and such. You've been wondering about it here, obviously. (PS: Do recall; those bullies aren't with you in the moment--aye, the memories = D: BUT, their kind of conditioning depends on adherence or attachment of ideas to events: know that there are factors in play with those events [the little details]. There, they concern attitude: this is why I say ask a friend--everyone has uniquely different personalities and attitudes when approaching a situation, though with many similarities {ie Bullies often have been troubled themselves in the past, and/or are...generally very immature.}
This is a really good idea, and i really wish it wasn't extremely difficult for me to get something like that going. I have difficulty initiating chats with my friends regardless of the subject at hand, especially if it involves asking something of them (the rules being somewhat different for my closest relatives, in that i know i can do regular talking with them without fear*). I am aware that this casts me in a different light from an outside perspective; i have been affectionately described as "doesn't need others" before. This is not the case. Although i am somewhat introverted and like my alone time, i do need others every bit as much as the next guy, i'm just too scared to ask most of the time, even if helping out is the actual job of the person i'm seeking to ask.
In other words, this deeply ingrained fear of rejection is my internal Balrog, and my internal Gandalf is in no condition to deny him passage. Although with the recent event of me realizing that this fear of rejection is behind almost everything, i might be able to heal up my Gandalf soon. I hope. Maybe then i can begin feeling like i'm in control of myself.
* This has been established BEFORE the bullying began, and ideally i'd want to be able to talk to anyone (or at least my friends) with a similarly casual attitude. I'm getting better at this due to very frequent exposure to new people who have no interest in harming me, but i still feel... Limited by inside factors. I'm scared of raising my voice, for example, even though my thoughts and writing can be LOUD AND BOMBASTIC.
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Topic: Things that made you sad today thread. (Read 9410461 times)