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[Zombie0hour]

Tonight, I go to war on every little creature and such that has ever frightened me in my dreams. I am going to cause them so much pain it shall be amazing. Wish me luck 

disclaimer: Just so ya know I lucid dream a lot so I am not doubting I can't do this 

[Kagus]

Thought this was gonna be a thread where people would face off against each other with their weirdest dreams.

Anyways, yeah.  Good luck.  Squish the little blighters.

[Cthulhu]

I would win that war.  Here's something from my dream journal.

The first part of the dream, I know I've had before, several times I believe. When I see it I become convinced it holds some great truth. I'm a disembodied observer, in a gray void, there are cartoon people walking around, but there is no color, it's all in shades of gray, except for a clown. The clown is in full color, and a disembodied voice reminiscent of the Twilight Zone narrator informs me that this clown is a genius. He goes around spreading his genius by touching others. The clown picks himself up, places himself over a person, that person is now a clown, and under the original clown is a blob that turns into a clown. These clowns continue to spread, until nearly everyone is a clown. The scene transitions, still in black and white, to a convenience store, where a clown blob has attached itself to an object someone is buying. This part of the dream there are no voices. Any time a person speaks, it is replaced by mood music. The person hands the item to the cashier, who places it on a shelf, for some reason. Suddenly it begins playing sad violin music, the buyer's hand turns into some kind of bright-green, square life-raft, and he holds out this appendage apparently begging for food. His hands split, and he appears to be doing a serenade, and the cashier appears to be smitten with him. His hands turn back into a life-raft, and the cashier hands him this sealed bag apparently containing food. The bag continually spews a tan fluid, and suddenly the cashier is distracted, perhaps by me, I suddenly gained a body around this time. When she was looking over at me, the sad kid sneaked behind the cash register into the back room. Suddenly, two fat kids burst into the room, demanding that the cashier girl be "chowdered", somehow I knew this meant she would be locked in the freezer. The sad kid ran out of the back room, excited at the prospect of also being "chowdered". I guess he liked being cold. They grabbed the cashier and left, and suddenly I began to slide (I never moved my legs) after them, determined to save her from the freezer. The fat kid looked back, I think he might have seen me, and then I woke up.

[Kagus]

So I'm going through this old warehouse or bunker or something (the beginning of the dream was a bit hazy.  Rather unfortunate since it was the most interesting part), along with numerous other people I don't know.  I'm with one little group, but there are others scattered around the compound.

The reason we're all in there is because of a couple giant, murderous beasts that are hunting us (one of which looks like the critters from the Aliens series, fully grown).  I look out a window and see them charging towards the entrance to the complex.

The lights are off in the room we're in, and everyone is staying dead still for fear of getting noticed.  Outside the door, we hear the beasts crash through the entrance, shortly followed by the screams of another group getting slaughtered.

We huddle together for some time, just trying to be as silent and unmoving as possible to avoid detection, when suddenly the beasts break down the door to our room and charge in.

In the brief moments when they're crossing the room, I try to find an escape route.  I leap, crashing headfirst and backwards through the window and start drifting high up into the sky, looking back on the monsters as they look out the window and apparently make a mental note to hunt me down to the ends of the earth.  I wouldn't know.  I don't speak monster.

Anyways, I'm floating higher and higher into the sky, and eventually see the whole "playing field", so to speak.  The compound I was in was somewhere up in the north, and down south there's a large medieval-ish city with a giant statue of some bearded hero or god or somesuch.  A couple roads meander here and there.

I observe this landscape and contemplate the horrible war that will come about when the evil forces finally make their way to the city, and then I'm at the character creation screen.

The character creation screen displays an assortment of various attributes or aspects that would define the character.  Basically just a bunch of bodyparts or bodypart adjustments.

So anyways, I make a new character, spawn somewhere in the world, and promptly get myself killed.  I get sent back to the character creation screen, but the parts I used last time are not available.  Also, the character I create the second time has a lower level than the one I did first.

The process of build-spawn-die-rebuild continues until I start running out of parts, at which point it has to supply new ones, such as the well-known "skeletal upper-body" aspect.

Anyways, I discover a "winged" aspect and a "serpentine" aspect, and figure it would be cool to create a Quetzalcoatl-themed character.

However, after selecting the pieces and starting to type in the name, the character preview shifts into a pre-made image and the name completes itself.  I have apparently found an easter egg, wherein Quetzalcoatl is recognized as a special character.

The image now shows what appears to be a teal-colored cross between a hummingbird and an ant.

However, when I spawn the character, it appears as a tall, thin humanoid person with Inca-ish clothing and blue skin.  He's also wearing a sombrero embroidered with astrological symbols around the rim.

I've spawned into a village full of peasants who obviously aren't too keen on seeing me, and start throwing stuff at me.  However, by spreading my arms wide I can send a big pink heart-shape floating through the air towards them.  Each one I hit with such a heart-projectile changes their mind about me and instead starts following me around in a friendly fashion.  I perform this procedure on everyone in town.

Then I wake up.

[Jackrabbit]

So this diabolical, warped version of Tommy from the Rugrats comes at me with a lightsaber but I smack him in the face with a wet fish and he runs off crying.
I really don't see why people have such trouble conquering their dreams. Somehow, a wet fish solves everything.

[Zombie0hour]

So this diabolical, warped version of Tommy from the Rugrats comes at me with a lightsaber but I smack him in the face with a wet fish and he runs off crying.
I really don't see why people have such trouble conquering their dreams. Somehow, a wet fish solves everything.

I was thinking more along the lines of dreaming me up with Chuck Norris powers, and then have some ACDC in the background while I kick some ass. Music never seems to work in dreams for me  . I have some really bad nightmares that have plagued me for a long time, and from what everyone I have ever talked too calls a nightmare.. its just kiddy play to the crap I have seen.

[Dakk]

Is there any way to make yourself more susceptible to dreams that doesn't involve psychoactive drugs? I haven't had a dream that I could remember for weeks.

[Aqizzar]

I used to have dreams all the time about fighting representations of people I knew, where they would beat the crap about of me because it felt like I was fighting them while swimming in glue.  The only time I actually had the upper hand was when I was beating up a kid I was forced to live with, which turned into a disturbing episode in it's own right.  The last time I had such a dream though, I whomped ass on some figure from high school, and I've never had a fighting dream since.

That said, my dreams are always unnerving.  I've had only a handful of real nightmares, but I've never once had a dream I would call pleasant.  They're just vaguely threatening or malevolent, whatever the subject matter.

However, I did have a whole series of dreams about some kind of bizarre conflict.  Unlike Kagus, I'll spoiler it.

Spoiler: Series of strangeness. (click to show/hide)

I have never had the same dream twice, or even similar dreams.  Except for this dream which I had, I think, four different times.  Each wasn't exactly the same, some parts were repeated, some weren't, like watching different scenes from the same production.  I think at the earliest I was seven, the latest at thirteen.  Also, every time I would wake up halfway through, go take a piss, then go back to bed, all with the dream still going in my head.  This never happens.  So it was definitely weird.

I can't remember all of it, and I'm not sure exactly what parts I dreamed in which order.  Likewise, since it was all so long ago, details have been altered by my memory, but I think I know what was really present.  The clearest scenes-

I'm standing on a road winding through a mountain.  Around me are some guys I can only call supersoldiers - hunchbacked with giant shoulders, wearing black armor-y outfits.  They're grabbing ordinary people trying to run away, and bending them up for some reason.  But they're not coming for me.  In some versions I'm just a witness, but in others I think I'm directing them, because I'm pointing at stuff.  I'm wearing huge black gloves.

I'm in a huge dimly lit warehouse.  There's a big official symbol on the wall, but I don't know what it looked like.  More supersoldiers are lugging crates around, me directing them again.  I distinctly remember at least some boxes being full of plants, but my mind says others were full of folded up bodies.  I'm not sure of that.

I'm standing on another cliff, looking down at a really alien landscape.  The ground and sky are shades of bright red, pink, and yellow.  The terrain is almost indescribable - huge lumpy stalks and mounds maybe.  If you've seen a lava lamp that hasn't quite turned on, you've got the idea.  There's these machines built all over, chrome metal towers and gantries, like futuristic oil pumps.

The part where I woke up to take a piss was always the same, but because I was half-awake also the haziest that I can still remember.  There's a man, tall and gaunt and pale, with white hair and flowing black clothes with huge gloves.  A lot like Sephiroth but this was years before FF7 came along.  I can't make out his face for some reason.  He's some distance away, standing over a lot of soldiers milling around, shouting orders and rhetoric they don't seem to listen to.

I'm standing on a bridge in the air, looking up at what I can only call a city of crystals.  It's a giant crystal mound, not city-like in any way, but I know it's a city.  Everything is glowing purple, which I remember being significant.

I'm walking through the weird red landscape again, coming up to one of the towers.  I ride an elevator up and push a big button in some control room, but I'm the only person around.  That one always ended quickly.

The then last scene, from the last dream.  The gaunt man is back, flanked by some soldiers.  I'm looking up at him standing on a platform, but there is no platform, just endless black void in every direction.  I can't see his face again, because he has his head back and arms out, laughing maniacally.  He finally stops and stares out into the void.  He gave a little speech, I can't remember what but it wasn't much, just a few sentences.  All I know is it was about some "great evil" occurring, but the last line is burning into my memory, written words floating in the air - "And it's all going to happen again."  I can see what he's staring at in the void.  Even though it's space black everywhere, I can see a floating blob of shining metal, like mercury, reflecting the pitch black around it.  There's no sense of scale, but I can tell that it's massive.

And that's my crazy recurring dream of some kind of conflict.

[Kamudo]

Dreams are amazing things, I think. Though sometimes they are a bit strange. They make you feel important, sometimes. The latest dream I personally had, was where I was a mercenary for the planet of microsoft and I was hired to destroy the apples and their fleet of seeds. Its was pretty entertaining. I was teamed up with Faize sheifa beleth from star ocean, and I told him I loved him. I get sad whenever I hear Jason Librecht speak, cause I think of the dream. Still, I wonder if there was a point to the dream itself.

[Cthulhu]

Even your dreams are manly.

Anyway, since Kagus mentioned Aliens, I have to tell an Alien-dream I had recently.  This dream was pretty scary when I had it, but now that I think about it was totally awesome.

The dream was a while ago and I only remember one scene clearly, and parts of it are hazy.

Spoiler: OHNOALIENS (click to show/hide)

I'm in my house with some people I don't recognize, and we all head to the basement to hide.  I assume we were hiding from the alien, although we may have been playing some kind of game.  Like I said, I don't remember what led up to this.  I lie on the floor and look up through the basement window, which is directly above me(on the ceiling) but still looks outside, despite the fact that it would actually be looking inside the house.  It didn't make much sense.  There's a black guy lying next to me also hiding, and other people around doing the same.  This lady, I believe she may have been Alyx Vance, looks down from outside and opens the window.  She's telling us something about how she can help us against the aliens, and just when it seems like she's a good guy, BAM.  Her head disconnects from her bottom jaw and drifts about a foot away from it, held on by tendrils of flesh, and more tendrils come out of her and grab the guy next to me.  It's kind of like the scene in The Thing where they tie the people together and test them, because there's not really anywhere we can go to get away, and I'm screaming, and the guy's screaming, and everyone's just screaming, and the tendrils are squeezing the guy so hard it's cutting him apart, and things have just gone completely insane.  I run to get lighter fluid from the kitchen, seeing as The Thing is vulnerable to fire.  Before I can get it The Thing leaves and I wake up.

Also, if you never seem to have dreams, try setting your alarm to around 4 in the morning.  You may have to change it depending on when you go to sleep, but if you can wake up during a REM cycle you're almost guaranteed to remember a dream.

[Rashilul]

Some of these dreams make my fighting-zombies-with-my-whole-family-while-on-top-of-Yoshi-with-a-gun-that-shoots-chainsaws
and fighting-zombies-with-whole-family-on-weird-puzzle-platform-things
and fighting-zombies-with-whole-family-in-a-platformer-shmup-brawler
even fighting-demons-with-a-refined-attitude-and-monocle
seem normal.
Oddly, these all came at around the time I got HL2.

[deadlycairn]

I always find it weird how in dreams, you just KNOW things, without any real explanation.

Anyway, the craziest dream I've had recently flicked between third and first-person (sometimes I was almost narrating, or reading a story, or controlling events, other times I was actually the person things were happening to). A friend had entered what amounted to an evil death-course, knowing that if he survived, it would grant his aim of changing the name of his town. About halfway through his journey, I followed, trying to save him. What followed was what seemed like hours of horrendous death after death, all from the mocking viewpoint of a 2d platformer (and we're talking mean. Kaizo Mario World mean). Soon it went from saving my friend to just getting through the death course (I had unlimited lives, but was trapped). When I finally escaped, things got REALLY trippy. I was climbing down a cliff, but at the same time I was watching myself climb down the cliff, repeating my mantra of "Don't fall don't fall don't fall" over and over, and I could SEE clones or copies of me trying to escape as the 'real' me carefully climbed down the cliff. And they were ALL dying horribly - one of them decomposed almost immediately, so I was treated to the sight of MY face melting. Then that wonderful dream logic kicked in, and I knew that they were alternate mes - mes that had never escaped, or failed the final escape. Explained why they were translucent at least, but still unpleasant.

[Duke 2.0]

 A steel sky blocking the sun. Great towers holding the steel heavens up, bristling with unknown machinery. Their base is surrounded with fissures going deeper than should be physically possible. I am on one of these towers, looking for something. These towers are miles high, and I am cold. Even wrapped in these heavy clothes I need the heat from this object... A lantern that isn't a lantern. It isn't just a lantern. It is something else. For a moment it is an indescribable object, seeming like like a strange toy to a young kid who makes a life for the toy completely different from what anybody else thinks it is. Like a car that is more than a car. Or an action figure that is more than just whatever man it represents.
 I am searching for something. Something big. Something to end this coldness. Like the lantern, but bigger. Like comparing a candle to the sun. I have to find it.

[Zombie0hour]

Even your dreams are manly.

Anyway, since Kagus mentioned Aliens, I have to tell an Alien-dream I had recently.  This dream was pretty scary when I had it, but now that I think about it was totally awesome.

The dream was a while ago and I only remember one scene clearly, and parts of it are hazy.

Spoiler: OHNOALIENS (click to show/hide)

I'm in my house with some people I don't recognize, and we all head to the basement to hide.  I assume we were hiding from the alien, although we may have been playing some kind of game.  Like I said, I don't remember what led up to this.  I lie on the floor and look up through the basement window, which is directly above me(on the ceiling) but still looks outside, despite the fact that it would actually be looking inside the house.  It didn't make much sense.  There's a black guy lying next to me also hiding, and other people around doing the same.  This lady, I believe she may have been Alyx Vance, looks down from outside and opens the window.  She's telling us something about how she can help us against the aliens, and just when it seems like she's a good guy, BAM.  Her head disconnects from her bottom jaw and drifts about a foot away from it, held on by tendrils of flesh, and more tendrils come out of her and grab the guy next to me.  It's kind of like the scene in The Thing where they tie the people together and test them, because there's not really anywhere we can go to get away, and I'm screaming, and the guy's screaming, and everyone's just screaming, and the tendrils are squeezing the guy so hard it's cutting him apart, and things have just gone completely insane.  I run to get lighter fluid from the kitchen, seeing as The Thing is vulnerable to fire.  Before I can get it The Thing leaves and I wake up.

Also, if you never seem to have dreams, try setting your alarm to around 4 in the morning.  You may have to change it depending on when you go to sleep, but if you can wake up during a REM cycle you're almost guaranteed to remember a dream.

Eh don't do the last part about waking up during a REM cycle, see I use to get sleep paralysis like that...  and trust me its no fun. You can't move and you have a demon sitting on your chest choking you.

[Rashilul]

I got sleep paralysis once. That was the time aliens did experiments on me.