While at work, one of the clients we had to do a carpet cleaning for (that knows my boss well), mentioned something about her kid having bullying troubles at their local school. Seeing as there's a crappy system that defends from bullying (which doesn't work at all; and if anything, defends the bullies more than the victims somehow; especially if the victim is standing their ground or fighting back), and inevitably, standing your guard gets you in trouble anyway, I have suggested a few counter-attack methods which sounded more funny, than outright harmful, and can possibly also send a message back that you're not to be messed with; however, I felt like I was rather lacking in my methods to suggest. I welcome more ideas that can appear more prankish and sickish, than outright harmful; or can be mis-interpreted as a crime (which the bully would win in defense).
However, here are a few I suggested to help them before they leave for home schooling. You know, to leave a mark before departure:
-Since in one incident, the bullies messed up their locker by pouring a cup of urine into their locker, my retort suggestion was along the lines of coating the inside of their bully's locker with dry cheyenne pepper (a good cup's worth), and make sure it coats everything inside by blowing air through the vents as it's poured in, and covering their lock, inside and out, with Sriracha hot sauce, or more subtlely (and easier to hide) Tobasco, and letting it dry on.
-Seeing as it's election season, figure out which party they support, and plaster their car and/or lockers/backpacks/etc. with the opposing party's stickers and support markers; and if they're not religious, plaster it with religious stickers and anti-abortion stuff (especially if it has aborted fetuses visible). Of course, keep the stickers placed street-legal. We want them to look like die-hard supporters of people they hate. In case they decide to return the favor, act like you oppose the people you support.
-Don't react to anything that comes your way; a lack of reaction should make them nervous, and give you, the victim, the air that you're potentially more dangerous than the bully in question; but only keep it within social circles to but not at the point authorities would have to be called in.
-Return the favor when THEY least expect it, depending on their timelines and degree of attack. Make them see how it feels for once.
I don't condone bullying, but sometimes, a victim showing some balls and successfully counter-attacking a bully; sometimes with a bit of counter-bullying ought to make one cheer for the little guy; if you don't have the brawn, use your brains, and out-think them, or mess with their heads, or give them a few harmless inconveniences to their schedules/activities, but nothing permanently damaging (like social networking destruction). A victim should always be above doing that. This should be supported if the school system's form of bully control remains as broken as it stands still (sounds like it hasn't changed since my good ol' days of elementary school).
Anyway, it felt nice at least to tell some of my ideas for counter-attacking bullying and the parent actually enjoying some of my ideas I gave them (cheap, annoying as hell if done right, and should get a message across to not be messed with). If it helps their kid rise up the ranks in their social circles, and teaches the bully some humility, then I'll be even happier. If they're still being put through hell, at least they're taking a few of their bullies down with them (and at least come to a draw with them, rather than constant loss). I wish I had the means and support to be able to do what I would suggest back then, with the kind of crap I had to deal with back then.