I'm still having fits of laughter about this, but I shit you not, it really happened. I got fired.
Despite the happy feels I get from being let go from my job, albeit rather disgracefully... about that... It wasn't the getting fired that made me happy. It was the utter absurdity if it all; how it unfolded, and how I somehow got taken out; but fortunately, was ready to take some leave to get back to gear.
It started with yesterday, and all manners of shit having gone south before the day even started, from my co-worker's view. All manners of little things that bugged my boss came up over the course of the morning, and basically we were given a discipline of sorts that seemed unnecessary (seeing as we already admitted previously to the same crap we were pointed out about for the n-th time; and we were on a bit of a rush or something, and we were the ones trying to pick up the pace of the whole ordeal of "discipline" which usually consists of half an hour of pointless reminding us many times for the thing we already admitted and fixed, and wanted to avoid the rush). Well, this is where things go absolutely bizarre. I had a very good feeling, almost truly optimistic feel about our day. Total happy-as-a-clam outlook. And then everything came to a head; on one of our jobs, my co-worker was trying to get something taken care of, awkwardly handled the hose for a moment and correcting himself, and then the colors of my boss came into full view. In essence, my co-worker got fired on the spot, and sent home with remaining pay, but no transportation home from us, until my boss realized he forgot to get all his stuff back from him, and made things even more of a hassle than necessary.
I sorta remarked, thinking we were private, that all this came at a wrong time, and I was preparing to, during the slow season, switch gears and take advantage of any free time I could have gotten, while my co-worker was still available, to focus on getting my graphic designing back into gear to fill in, and maybe accelerate (with a prior failure at takeoff happening previously, and my disappointment at the time, completely disregarded by his memory) into a career again. I even remember telling them first day, that I needed this job to support me for the time being, and I had no intent of permanent stay. That little tidbit is important, because it seemed he disregarded that too. Hell, after the job, he disregarded everything, and decided to take complete personal offense at my remark and heads-up, and because the customer overheard our conversation and asked what kind of work I was doing on the side, out of curiosity, I happily explained my studies, and gave an example of work he may have seen; and I even mentioned it was an on/off kind of thing.
About that personal offense he took, he chose to be offended like I insulted his entire core being, down to the inner sanctum of his soul; and I saw his true colors again, now directed at me, seeing as my ex-coworker is no longer an alternative that was also a bit of a whipping boy for every complaint my boss didn't want to admit was his own handiwork of ignorance. He let me have it, like a drill sergeant after a few espressos and a few doses of crack, and a really pissed off attitude. All about "how rude I was talking about such things in front of a customer" (Uh, yeah; that guy was a nosy one, and you detonated like a nuclear bomb in front of him earlier), completely ignoring the fact that he has very nosy-ass customers that listen in on everything; and he gossips and bullshits with them on a regular basis anyway. To make things better, after enduring one of the hottest days around, after all that, and being a man short, and a 5-hour day becomes a 9-hour one; I was given a buddy-buddy chatting, and being asked for forgiveness and; basically, I thought by this point, the hatchet was buried.
Apparently not, when you get tomahawked with a bombshell announcement on the way to the first job that you got fired for the same petty fucking reason that we thought we cooled down, and brushed aside last night. I was surprised, but amused at the same time. Excellent time to drop that bomb, in the middle of fucking traffic; and busy, dangerous traffic while at it. That was a glancing thought. Just as well, he not only told me I was fired, but he battered me with all kinds of personal attacks. Attacking my character, my livelihood, my motives, my beliefs and such. Hell, what didn't he attack that was an attempt to be as soul-crushing as humanly possible? I mean, he was attempting to drag me below his level, and keep me there, like the most hardcore bully you can imagine. My reaction: Stoic as fuck.
I kept silent. I endured his personal attacks. I retained my urge to kill him... if I wasn't laughing so utterly hard on the inside. He lost his level of threat when he fired me on the spot; I'm no longer on his payroll. I just let him continue pelitng me with his worst. Because... well, I had an ace up the sleeve. When you're in deep shit, keep silent and keep looking forward. Recalling that image caption and image (fox in a crowd of hounds, blends right in). Well, after the first job and a few hours, my boss returns to me with the biggest "Oh crap./Oh shit." expressions on his face. Fridge Horror hit him like a freight train. He failed to realize that I was his last employee left, and a bit of an ace while at it (at least as effective as having 2-3 people in one.), and without me, he's on his own, high and dry. That kept me smiling on the inside for the rest of the day. If this were the Sims, I would be at platinum mood right now. NOTHING could ruin this day. I could be attacked by a shark, and still be smiling. The rest of the day was awkward. For him; not me. He unwittingly gave me what I needed all along. An out. BTW, I am still on payroll until I can be replaced (which requires getting new help, and training them. Time to get done: 2 weeks), and my goodness, I'm gonna enjoy this.
So summary: I know how my boss truly felt about us, and confirmed my suspicions of how he felt about us (I don't think they ever liked me. I was their "dumb muscle"), and I was right to be paranoid of such so-called nice people (ladies, I understand why nice guys finish last. I don't trust them either.). I practiced the good ol' advice of going where celebrated, not tolerated (basically, I got my out), my boss humiliated himself and is slowly realizing just how hard he screwed himself overall; and I think they're also in a full state of denial. He's stuck with me for 2 more awkward additional weeks until I can be replaced. His pride was his downfall.
. I'm milking this comedy gold for all it's worth, financially as well (way more practical), by this point. He thinks he sent me to Hell. I dine there. Techinically, I'm fired. But my boss is stuck with me for 2 more weeks due to his own shortsightedness. He personally attacked my character to my very core, and I was patient and took it all in. He doesn't realize just how patient I really am. These will be an amusing couple weeks.
A previous co-worker before the recent one quit/got fired for some BS reason as well. His thought was "It would be a miracle if he could last another week with that guy" (About me dealing with my boss). 6 months after that statement, it was my boss that caved in, not me.
Just as well, I just recalled my old dream of one of my dream girls punching out God. I know now just how she must've felt. Listening to awesome music as I reflect on all this, and just relaxing in total bliss (all that as the sign-off to the day). Summary: Awesome.
Author
Topic: [MILK] There were 12 eggs here what did you do with them? (Happy thread?!) (Read 16174339 times)