Time to wax that ego like there ain't no stop.
I apologize in advance to those about to read this.
-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling secondDuke [SD] --
SD: Not a good time, Vriska.
AG: Hey, I heard an ugly rumour that you're dead, is that true? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
SD: If I were dead would I be talking to you?
AG: John died, and he's doing pretty well. Wh8t a shame, too, you would've made a great corpse. When you do die, could I t8xidermy you and keep you in my office? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
SD: I don't see the point in asking, you'll just do it regardless.
AG: That's right, I did.
SD: Did?
AG: I'm t8lking from the future. Your corpse really brightens up the room, did you know that? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
SD: No suprise, my devilish good looks would make any house a home.
AG: I glued a f8ke moust8che onto your f8ce and dressed you up in a tutu and short shorts.
SD: Oh really? Could I get a picture? I always wondered what I'd look like with a moustache.
AG: ........ Ok8y I d8n't h8ve your corpse.
SD: I figured that much.
AG: Anyways, how goes the b8ttle? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
SD: Wh8t's it to you?
SD: *What's
AG: I'm st8rting to rub off on you, am I?
SD: No suprise when you're constantly pestering me. Don't you have anything better to do?
AG: Not really, when you're floating through sp8ce on a huge rock waiting to be found and killed by a one armed dog man.
SD: Well why not pester Dave, or Jade?
AG: They're not as fun to troll.
SD: So I guess that makes me your favorite?
AG: Yes and no. You're my f8vorite to annoy, and w8rst in every other reg8rd.
SD: Pfft, you know why you talk to me.
AG: Are you implying th8t I m8ght 8ctu8lly enjoy a s8ngle s8cond of our convers8tions?
SD: Why else would you keep calling? Unless you're "waxing black."
AG: UGH! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! To think th8t I w8ld f8ll head ov8r heels for an imm8ture, sopor slurping, bast8rd like you is disgusting! ! ! ! ! ! !
SD: That was only seven exclamation points.
AG: !
AG: F8cking h8ppy now?
SD: Yes.
AG: St8ck your head in a buck8t.
SD: I hate you too, babe ;^)
-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling secondDuke [SD] --
SD: Bluh bluh, huge bitch. <3
Technically romance, what with the four flavors of troll love.
It's not a bad fic, but not terribly representative of me. And I inherently dislike the idea of including myself in the current story. I can take alternate universe with B12ers wankery, but that goes too far for me.
ignoring the update i decided to do some Duke/Vriska after all
-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling secondDuke [SD] at ??:??--
AG: Duke!
AG: Duke
AG: Hey Duke! I've got something for you! ::::D
SD: Alright
AG: Want to guess what it is????????
SD: No.
AG: Sp8ilsp8rt! Well let me tell you what it is then.
AG: I got you a, w8 for it, w8 for it
AG: A 8a8y claw8east!
SD: What the hell is a clawbeast
SD: I mean I get it Andrew Hussie gave trolls stupid names for things for shits and giggles but seriously
SD: 'Clawbeast' is a ridiculously vague name for something
SD: I honestly do not have any clue what a clawbeast is supposed to be
AG: Well then, I'll tell you in simple terms that a human like you can understand! I'll even ignore that silly stuff a8out this weird hum8n guy you 8lw8ys mention. I swe8r I 8lmost think you're flushed for him 8nd not me!
SD: WHAT
AG: A claw8east is a small furry animal with claws and a tail! They are like your human cats that I have read a8out, 8ut much 8etter 8ecause they are from Alternia!!!!!!!!
SD: STOP
SD: STOP RIGHT THERE
SD: I AM NOT FLUSHED FOR YOU
AG: Well may8e you're 8lack then, it's so hard to tell with your we8rd hum8n rom8nce!
AG: Obviously you c8n't 8e neither 8ecause I am the 8est and all the humans line up to woo me! Even though I 8lre8dy have 8ll the qu8dr8nts. 8ll of th8m!
SD: Do you understand human romance at all?!
SD: Look I even abandoned that stupid typing quirk I force myself to use! Gog you are 8nnoying.
SD: FUCK
AG: Hahahahahahahaha! And you say you aren't falling for me. Soon you'll 8e fawning over my every move! Just w8, you'll see!
-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling secondDuke [SD][/color] at ??:??--
SD: Wait
SD: Where the hell is my kitten
-- arachnidsGrip [AG] began trolling secondDuke [SD] at ??:?? --
AG: Well I need your address first o8viously!
AG: How can I give you a 8a8y claw8east if I don't know where to go????????
SD: Damnit Vriska
-- secondDuke [SD] ceased pestering arachnidsGrip [AG] at 10:25 --
AG: <>
AG: G8g I d8n't even kn8w wh8t I see in him!
-- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased trolling secondDuke [SD][/color] at ??:??--
Not bad at all mate. It even has some fuel for the Toony fire, from which more rumors may spread.
I'll try my hand at this crack pairing, I guess. Ten minutes, and... presto!
-- secondDuke
SD began trolling arachnidsGrip
AG at ??:??--
GG: G8G DAMMIT VRISKAAG: Oh, how cuuuuuuuute!GG: Shut up, fuck you
GG: I have a real problem here, woman
GG: This stupid clawbeast you sent--ow!
GG: This stupid clawbeast keeps ripping up my furniture, and now it's trying to feast on my flesh
GG: Anything you want to say?AG: Uh........ you're welcome?GG: That's not what I meant
GG: Maybe something along the lines of "sorry"?
GG: Like this
GG: "Soooooooo sorry for sending you the rending gnashing troll a8omination, Duke, I swear I won't do it again!!!!!!!!"AG: Oh please, Duke, you love it! It reminds you of me!GG: If you mean the part where it daily tears away at the already shredded remnants of my soul, yes, you and it share a striking resem8blance.
GG: Oh damn itAG: Ha! Look at you, Duke, you c8n't help 8ut fall for my alluring nature! I'm not even trying and you're practically o8sessed with me!!!!!!!!
AG: You know, ever since I got you that thoughtful gift, I've 8een w8ing for you to return the favor.GG: WhatAG: You know!
AG: Something stunning and heartfelt to show how madly flushed you are for me, like the good little 8oy you are!!!!!!!!GG: Go choke and die Serket
GG: As long as I live I'll never sink so low as to
GG: Wait
GG: On second thought, I've got the perfect gift in mindAG: R8lly?GG: Yeah, something to remind you of me, something so stunningly green all you'll be able to think of is meAG: Wh8t is it?
?GG: It's a creature from Earth
GG: Well, sort of
GG: It's called a Creeper. I think you're going to love itAG: Awwwwwwww, how very sweet of you! It's kind of endearing to see how pathetic you are, trying to scrounge up a gift for me, 8ut sweet! I'll 8e w8ting! ::
-- arachnidsGrip
AG ceased trolling secondDuke
SD at ??:??--
GG: Yep, just try to think of anybody else but me after the boom, bitch
Seems to be veering slightly towards a theoretical John Me mix, but still in the right spirit here.
I kinda wish I could encapsulate spoilers in spoilers so this self-wankery could be shamefully hidden from the world, but whatever I'll just get to the update.
...
There is literally nothing more to say other than Rose is making this overly dramatic for no good reason. If I start to see something bleeding then I'm calling this playing around.
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Topic: MSPA Homestuck (Read 5136451 times)