Vriska: immediately lose interest in Nicholas CageOh, but you could NEVER do that!!!!!!!!
What a marvelous creature he is. What a daring dream, to combine the only redeeming qualities of humanity with the elegance and nobility of the Troll kingdom. How you wish you could know his world. To hear one night his muted, street tough feet traipse up your stairs. A low but friendly growl unsettles your slumber, and as the sopor clears from your eyes they detect a distinct shape's shadow cutting sunlight. A mysterious stuffed rabbit invites. Wouldn't his present suit you? Would not this rough around the edges gift prove to you his undying loyalty?
No need to answer. Newfound flush feelings slough from the hating mind like a useless dead membrane as a more visceral sapience takes over. A simpler quadrant is in charge now, a force untouched by the concerns and burdens of the upright, unfostered since your youth yet completely intact. It now drives you through the midday brush, your hands quickly searching this Earth "Youtube", unearthing with each bold click a new animation depicting HIM~. But not for long, as you and the John human both know that he~ has perished in the meteor storm that grasped their planet.
You note his red blood and don't even care.
HOLY FUCK WHAT AM I EVEN READING HERE?
?