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Total Members Voted: 44

[Byakugan01]

What is the stupidest death you have seen a dwarf die of its own volition (IE, you did not tell it to do that)? For me, I had a setup to capture three GCSs I had found in a chasm alcove. I setup the cage traps, stationed a "bait" recruit, catch one of them...and then the hunter who just arrived rushes in, eager to kill naked mole dogs. There were still two gcs left, completely unengaged. Long story short, the mole dog was killed, but then a gcs killed him, and then his stupidity dragged the bait recruit into the fray, and he got wounded and trapped in a cage (chasm dumped...)! Suffice it to say, i refused to give this dwarf a proper burial-instead, i chucked his corpse into the chasm. Only by LUCK did both remaining gcs get caught-i could have had the things rampaging in my fortress in year 2 of my fort, what with the gap the caged recruit left!

Edit: You know, i can actually imagine that hunter shouting "Hey watch this!" as he darted out towards the spiders.

[Stargrasper]

Long, highly abridged story short, fire started spreading from the volcano.  Many dwarves died in seconds...I drafted my last three dwarves and ordered them into the underground, stone, and completely fireproof fortress.  Two didn't make it.  Okay, fine, dwarves can't necessarily outrun wildfire.  My last dwarf, drafted and ordered into the fortress....refused to move...at all...I watched him sit there and burn to death when he could have easily survived(and I could have easily run the fortress long enough to get immigrants).  I wouldn't have been able to bury anyone that early on, I'd literally just started that fortress.  Regardless, it was a moot point because it was the last dwarf.  His death meant the annihilation of the expedition party.

[Nerserus]

Well my magma forge project ( The world i was playing was modded. Giant magma cave spiders = Ownage, and an everyday threat if you don't kill them quickly. ) I got myself a "protector" ( A heavily armed Dwarven Hammerdwarf) gave him a *Keen Thunder Hammer* ( Basically a two handed warhammer made out of a material harder than steel. ) and a set of armor.

I got my two miners to dig out a channel, make a grate of keen, a door to be kept forbidden after we made the channels to permanently ensure 100% safety of the men. All looked like it was going smoothly, until i had a MASSIVE amount of retardation from my dwarves: The legendary miner at the LAST SECOND went into the down staircase ( For no appearent reason oddly ) and got burned by the magma the moment the other miner finished digging the final channel.

The surviving miner trapped himself on an "island" surrounded by magma, with no way out, and fire imps getting pretty annoyed with the tresspassers, i relied on my protector to save the day...First he had a drink...Then he had something to eat...Then he was coming...Then he went on his break...

Long story short. That day many dwarves felt the wrath of Dwarf Companion's "Hurt" feature. Sure made me feel better.

[Sorcerer]

I had a legendary, but all too common mishap..

Orcs were invading, and my military were nowhere near good enough to face them yet, so i ordered the drawbridge closed
a dwarf ran forwards to pull the lever, and then promptly fell asleep right next to it.. He got torn to pieces by orcs, along with the rest of my fort

[Untelligent]

I once found the corpse of my Dwarven Liason propped up against the bottom of my recently completed goblin execution tower. I came to the obvious conclusion that she had been standing on a bridge I was using as scaffolding as the mayor/mason removed it.

[Ironhand]

I once watched a dwarf rush out onto the frozen (major) river right before the spring thaw. Now, I order "dwarves stay inside" during the winter. Even better, maybe I should get around to making a swimming pool...

[Sensei]

Every dwarf who traps themselves behind a wall and starves.

Every dwarf who catches on fire, and then decides the heat is making them really thirsty, so they should head to the booze stockpile before they get around to going to the nearest pond like I ordered them to.

Every dwarf who somehow lets the hostile animal I told them to dump in pit escape (for some reason this never happens to goblins).

And, my personal favorite, every dwarf who stands in FRONT of the ballista or on the wrong side of the fortifications- hey it's only a few tiles away, right?

[Creamcorn]

Stupidest dwarf death I had, was when one of my early miners decided that it was a good idea to dig a channel right below their feet. Unfortunately there happened to be a magma pipe right below their feet.

And thats when I learned that magma pipes have obsidian around them.

[Albedo]

The dwarf who is told to channel out the last tile to the magma vent, and decides to go around, down the stairs, and channel it out from the side.

[Elliott_Thinas]

Incredibly well armed hunters sleeping in the middle of the field as the orcs approach. Don't even wake up while they are being beaten to pieces with flails.

[Opirian]

The dwarf that decides running 3 tiles away from an ambush is a great time to turn around and head back to work.

[Byakugan01]

Oh, and i forgot: If you can describe in detail and with humor, bonus points. (IE, what made one dwarf's actions stand out in particular).

Here's another one: I had a legendary bone carver who was collecting bones outside when an orc siege popped up-with one squad right by him. Instead of running back to the fortress, he instead ran STRAIGHT to the right, orc wrestlers hot on his heels. He must have been looking back the whole time, because he literally ran right into ANOTHER squad of orcs-this time ARMED (orc pikemen, I believe). Then he fled UP, towards the TOP of the map-with a a broken leg. The THREE entrances to my fort were near the bottom (technically, middle due to the ocean) of the map. Needless to say, he didn't last long, and fortunately no descendants were around to continue his legacy.

[Skorpion]

- Dwarf killed by giant bat while collecting webs near a chasm.
- Dwarf killed by same bat while retrieving the above dwarf's corpse.
- Hammerdwarf killed by same bat trying to attack the bat.
- Dwarf roasted by fire imp while trying to retrieve the above corpses.
- Dwarf roasted by brush fire while, you guessed it, trying to retrieve corpses.
- Two dwarves sucked into chasm by cave-in while trying to build connected to only a bridge they were standing on.

And this is in a community fort, no less.

[Sensei]

My duke kept making demands for adamantium furniture.

Heh, hehe... what a stupid dwarf... 

[Heron TSG]

A fisherdwarf (accidentally mason-enabled) walled himself into the rabid dog pit, but won out, albeit with no legs. On the way out, he fell unconscious and was nailed by an adamantium shortsword weapon trap.