I find this very educational, never again will I dismiss Israeli & Palestinian conflict with: "they should just talk about it".
Well, I think there's a crucial difference between Israel/Palestine and our repeated tensions. Regarding Isreal/Palestine, both sides only believe peace can only come after the other side gives up. They escalate violence because they think violence is the only thing that will demonstrate their resolve in the face of violence.
<pause for irony>
You and I both believe that peace is possible (as near as I can tell). We just disagree on the terms that will make that peace likely. I see peace as dependent on successful negotiation, i.e. the arms restrictions and spheres of influences proposal to slow the march to war or the garrison and payments proposal to make war prohibitively dangerous. What you see as leading to peace eludes me, I must confess. So far as I can tell you only want peace when it involves absolutely no sacrifice on your own behalf. But at least you do actually want peace.
IMHO there is some silver bullet that will lead to peace between us. Even if you don't grow more open to negotiation, eventually, I can find a proposal that's a net gain for you and allays my fears. The only problem is that I don't know what that silver bullet is and you don't care. Both sides are willing to negotiate for peace, so it's possible with the right agreement.
Israel and Palestine... well, there have been volumes written about what peace between those two sides would require. And majorities in both communities do not wish to accept such requirements.