Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Jim Groovester]

Ooh, looks like some of the forum dwarves get to go on a road trip. I bet they'll get into lots of crazy adventures and escapades on the journey.

[Maggarg - Eater of chicke]

Diary of maggarg
Escape seems possible! I heard Aryn wants to send some soldiers on a road-trip to guard caravans.
It'd be boring and no challenge, but at least I won't be hunted down and executed by about 5 different people.
On second thoughts, that's a human caravan. The one that goes to that town.
Ah, 1033 was a great year for the Old Firm. We did lose No-fingers Blindeyes, our archer, but that wasn't really much of a loss.

[Heavy Flak]

The events of the 24^th of Hematite, 1070

"Why are you standing out here?" Aryn asked.  He carried with him a large tome, and behind him Cokho Roknut strained under the weight of an armor bin.  Beside the trade depot, arms crossed over his broad chest, stood Duke Whippedentries, glowering at the haulers and the humans.

"I'm making sure that our Dwarves follow instructions to the letter, Aryn."
"Shouldn't you be meeting with the diplomat?  I understand you're new here, but-"
"I understand you're a criminal, and if it was up to me you'd be drawn and quartered!"

Aryn pursed his lips, but held his tongue.  He counted to ten in his head, took a deep breath, and spoke in a calm, even voice.  "Perhaps you should go meet with the diplomat, he's waiting in your room."
"Aryn, I'm not leaving here until I make sure you don't do ANYTHING stupid."

Aryn took another deep breath.  "Like what, Onul?"
"Like selling copper items."
"...selling copper items?"

The Duke rolled his eyes.  "You didn't check the mandate board."
"What mandate board?" Aryn nearly shouted.
"The one posted by the larder.  No selling copper items," The Duke began to recite from memory, "At least one Iron construction by the end of the season, no selling lead items, and at least two pig-iron constructions."

Aryn sighed, and tucked the larger ledger under his arm.  "You can post all the mandates you want, but we no longer have a fortress guard.  There are no punishments for missing mandates, sir.  Bluster all you want, but this bin full of copper and lead armor?  I'm selling it to all these humans for a single log.  Now for the last time, why don't you go meet with the diplomat before he leaves unhappy, and punishes us next trade season?"

[Heavy Flak]

Notes for this story:  There might not be an update for a while, and for that, I apologize.  See, my mother's coming into town this weekend to act as nurse and chauffer, since I'm going through LASIK on Monday.  I'll probably have some free time since Mom entertains herself pretty well, but just as a heads up - you might not hear from me until Thursday or so.  Wish me luck, I hope I don't go blind out punch out another eye doctor. 

[Tarquinius]

You can post all the mandates you want, but we no longer have a fortress guard.  There are no punishments for missing mandates, sir.  Bluster all you want, but this bin full of copper and lead armor?  I'm selling it to all these humans for a single log.  Now for the last time, why don't you go meet with the diplomat before he leaves unhappy, and punishes us next trade season?"

Aryn usually irritates me, but I find this quote amusing, likely because I have taken advantage of the fact that no guard means no punishment.

[Glacies]

Are crimes still stacking up? Love to see the blood when the fortress guard gets reinstated, if it gets reinstated, and it won't get reinstated, at a guess. Maybe if Strav goes all murderous.

[Maggarg - Eater of chicke]

Are crimes still stacking up? Love to see the blood when the fortress guard gets reinstated, if it gets reinstated, and it won't get reinstated, at a guess. Maybe if Strav goes all murderous.

A berserk Stravich doesn't bear thinking about.

[Jim Groovester]

Maybe if Strav goes all murderous.

I think we're a little beyond the point of 'maybe'.

[Stravitch]

I happened upon this book the other day and I thought someone here might like it.  Not saying who though...

http://www.amazon.com/Passion-Donkeys-Elisabeth-D-Svendsen/dp/1873580029/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1248805345&sr=8-1

[Heavy Flak]

An Update:

I drove myself to the doctors office today, wearing a set of biker shades.  The nurses fawned all over me - a nice change from yesterday when everyone was terrified I was going to go insane with fear and wreck them and their machines - and I was told one day after the operation, I now have 20/30 vision that would "continue to improve over the next few weeks as my eyes healed"

Anyone who's thinking about getting LASIK, it's a horrifying procedure, and I nearly went insane with fear as they started drawing on my eyeballs with felt tip markers and cutting flaps in them, and when I could smell my eyeballs melting under the laser-beam...

I guess I'd go through it all again.  <3  I'll try to get an story update done tomorrow.

[Jim Groovester]

Glad that you came out of it okay.

Now that you're out of surgery, get back to work. I expect an update in my office at whenever o' clock sharp!

[Maggarg - Eater of chicke]

An Update:

I drove myself to the doctors office today, wearing a set of biker shades.  The nurses fawned all over me - a nice change from yesterday when everyone was terrified I was going to go insane with fear and wreck them and their machines - and I was told one day after the operation, I now have 20/30 vision that would "continue to improve over the next few weeks as my eyes healed"

Anyone who's thinking about getting LASIK, it's a horrifying procedure, and I nearly went insane with fear as they started drawing on my eyeballs with felt tip markers and cutting flaps in them, and when I could smell my eyeballs melting under the laser-beam...

I guess I'd go through it all again.  <3  I'll try to get an story update done tomorrow.

Eye surgery horrifies me. It's probably one of the few surgical procedures that actually freaks me out.

[Heavy Flak]

The events of the 3^rd of Hematite, 1070

"GET OUT THERE!" Rinsesilver shrieked.  "THEY'RE WRECKING THE PLACE!"

The smattering of miners and engravers just stared at her in shock, and horror, no one moving from their seats.  They had heard the screams from above, the shattering windows, the beat of hooves on stone.  Eventually there was a sigh from a back table, and Sparrow rose, notching a bolt into his crossbow.

"I'll handle the problem, ma'am, please have a beer on the table when I return."

Silently he cursed Keldor's absence as he trudged up the stairs.  The Dread Camel herds had been increasing in size, and in their occurrences, and Merkil was finding it hard to schedule squads to patrol the wastes all the time.  This was taking a toll on the soldiers, who had become sullen, their off hours spent sleeping or drinking.

As he reached the entrance, Sparrow saw a miner huddling in the corner, protecting his face from a skeletal camel's gnashing teeth.  With a sigh, he raised the crossbow and fired, shattering a shoulder with the steel bolt.  With a cry of surprise, he dropped the bolt he was attempting to load as a hoof crashed into his arm, leaving a gash in the skin.  A second beast had come from the side, and was readying a second kick at him. 

Bellowing with rage, Sparrow hefted the crossbow like a club and swung it, the camels head snapping from the weak neck.  It exploded into dust and bonemeal agaisnt the wall.  The air was knocked out of him as he was shoved back against a wall by the first beast.  In such close range, he was having a hard time getting a decent swing on his crossbow, just chipping at bone, shredding dried flesh. 

The skin around the empty sockets widened briefly, before the camel dropped to the stones, hewn in half.  Wilber stood by the doors, grinning widely, and Sparrow gave him an appreciated nod. 

"A laugh, a cry, a sneak attack; a heavy slice, a snicka-snack, I sliced in half the camel's back."
"...That you did, Wilber, that you did."

"Saw a little girl today, riding the camels, wearing a robe of reds and greens."
Sparrow sighed, rubbing at his gashed arm.  "I'm sure you did, Wilber, why don't we-"
"Indeed!  She used them, vaulted off to the sun, and flew back down - into the zoo.  From there?  Who knows.  I heard your battle, came to help!"

"If I buy you a drink, will you shut up?"
"Until it's quaffed!"
"I suppose that's the best I can hope for."

[Jim Groovester]

"Saw a little girl today, riding the camels, wearing a robe of reds and greens."
Sparrow sighed, rubbing at his gashed arm.  "I'm sure you did, Wilber, why don't we-"
"Indeed!  She used them, vaulted off to the sun, and flew back down - into the zoo.  From there?  Who knows.  I heard your battle, came to help!"

Uh oh.

Hikan would be anxious if he knew about this. Jools would be anxious if he knew about how close she was to his donkeys.

[Flar Moonchill]

An Update:

I drove myself to the doctors office today, wearing a set of biker shades.  The nurses fawned all over me - a nice change from yesterday when everyone was terrified I was going to go insane with fear and wreck them and their machines - and I was told one day after the operation, I now have 20/30 vision that would "continue to improve over the next few weeks as my eyes healed"

Anyone who's thinking about getting LASIK, it's a horrifying procedure, and I nearly went insane with fear as they started drawing on my eyeballs with felt tip markers and cutting flaps in them, and when I could smell my eyeballs melting under the laser-beam...

I guess I'd go through it all again.  <3  I'll try to get an story update done tomorrow.

I've always been intriued by the ee surgery route, but frankly it scares the hell out of me! Glad it went well dude let us know if it worked alright!