Find random objects to throw at the orb
(6) Looking around, Margaret spots an alchemist's stand loaded with potions. She picks one at random and, praying, tosses it at the orb. It's a hit! The orb instantly doubles in size, consuming the nearest building and several trees.
"Those were old growth!" the alchemist cries. "Old growth! Where am I supposed to get my century-old elm leaves now? And you'd better bet I'm charging you for that potion!"
Then proceed onward!
((Whoops))
(1) Suddenly, John's shoes feel wet. He looks down to find himself standing in the shallows of a wide river. Whoops!
[It was not quite clear that an action was supposed to be given with the character intro :p ]
Nobody travels off in the direction of the Demon Lands, staff in hand.
Close examination Looking at the staff with any amount of attention immediately reveals to the observer that it fits poorly into reality, with it constantly visually distorting, squares intermittently shifting away or changing color, and emitting a staticy sound akin to unfocused arcane energy.
(2) Nobody brings with him a stick, which is kind of like a staff in that it's long and made of wood. No distortion, unless you count some of the bark peeling off.
Gather a hundred or so Sea Raiders, then head to the demon lands.
Grab a very long axe with a big blade, then destroy the villages of the demons and loot the booze and women.
(3) Harald manages to convince a drunk fisherman (a raider of the sea if Vlad's ever known one) to come with him to the Dark Lands. Actually, he invited him to the pub, but the fisherman is too drunk to tell the difference. They set off, only somewhat slowed by the fisherman's drunken stumbling. He doesn't do the second thing because he can only do one thing a turn!
Can I still join? If yes then, I am Bob the 5th, son of Bob the 2nd! And get some armor
(3) Bob the Second brings with him on his journey the shield of his ancestors. Unfortunately, his ancestors were not metalworkers: it's a half-rotten piece of wood.
((K I will give it a whirl))
People have nicknamed me Dino, which I suppose is because of my fiery temper. As I lacked a family to name me, I’ve since stuck with Dino. Most of my life has been contaminated by pain and misery, so if I ever have a claim to heroism, however twisted it might be, it would be that I would destroy those who cause problems on purpose.
Explore a town until I find a restaurant or tavern so I can eat something
(2) All businesses are currently closed on account of the giant flaming orb.
Its time for Bob to fulfill his destiny, but first he has to buy a donkey so he can get to his destination and some more booze for the journey.
(4) Bob manages to locate the one merchant brave enough to continue doing business. He purchases a donkey and ale-bottle at only mildly unreasonable markup.
Engage in some recreational monster-smiting as the journey progresses towards the demon-lands.
(2) Sadly, there are no monsters to be smitten this close to the city. Beethro slaps a mosquito, but he doesn't get any EXP for it--which is bullshit! It was a hell of a slap; a smite, even. And aren't mosquitoes terribly monstrous, when you think about it? They suck blood, spread disease, hum in your ear: they're like tiny vampires! They ought to be worth at least a fraction of a point. But alas, they are not.
Well, only one thing to do: head in the general direction of the border. And that's the direction of the sunrise. Right? Sun rises in the east, sets in the west, and on the map the tower is to the east. I think.
(5) By following the sun, Augustine manages to blunder his way to a river. A river! This must be the River Rof, from which King Wizzo III's water magician's repelled the Fifth Diabolic Invasion of 683! And if it was the site of an invasion, it must lie between the Kingdom and the Dark! Surely. Definitely. Well, he hasn't checked it on a map, but— He's entirely certain so he hops across some rocks (an option here, at the river's narrowest point) and continues across the plains.
"Woof" *Whine*
Drag a earth mage near the Ball of Fire and try to convince him or her to use the spell "Sand Waterfall" to put it down.
(5) The wizard, who is wearing too many layers to be conclusively identified as a him or as a her, nods and begins to chant. A shower of sand strikes the orb, substantially reducing its size at the cost of covering the square in gross burnt sand. The mage falls over and begins to snore.
Beethro, Harald, John, and
Nobody find themselves at the edge of the River Rof. A bridge allows for passage over the water, but the way is blocked by a man waving a tall red flag. "Stop!" he cries, wheezing. "If you're using the bridge, you'll have to pay the toll--new city ordinance. Ten copper pieces a head." He cranes his neck. "Donkeys have big heads, so they'll run you twelve."
Journey Progress
L----B----D
Augustine ?????@?????
Beethro ^@---|----*
Bob @----|----*
Bob (2) @----|----*
Dino @----|----*
Harald ^@---|----*
John ^@---|----*
Margaret @----|----*
Spot @----|----*
Nobody ^@---|----*
Demon Lord Invades in 30 Days