Turn 32This is... all... a big misunderstanding. Um. You see, I only needed the... Timey wimey thing to... save the Universe, since it’s about to be eaten by giant furry horn rats. Yeah. And I was going to... Uh... Read books on how to stop them, by dematerializing, and I, uh, thought that would leave me kind-of safe from... Universe devour-y things... and you, in my, uh, time machine. I... I was going to return it, like. I wasn’t just going to... run off with your tardis, no... I was going to uh... Go to Gallifrey! Yeah! To get a... Worse... Or better... Tardis... Thing... Like I said, it’s all a biiig misunderstanding, so if you could just drop me off at Gallifrey, I’ll just bugger off and I’ll make it up to you for the bear traps. And you cna take the remote controls for yer thing.
3She gives you a skeptical look, walks up, and takes back her TARDIS's controls. She then gestures over her shoulder at your own damaged time machine. "Whatever. There's the door, then. I trust you'll see yourself out."
Try to strangle one of the goat men with my tentacle, if they have blood, drain it to make a second tentacle and continue strangling until its dead
(You're an eyeball-sized creature who's never even been in a fight trying to strangle apocalyptic gods. I wasn't sure whether to give you a penalty for difficulty or a bonus for sheer audacity.)
2-1, 2+1You leave the Z-wing to float in the Eldritch Plane's sky and attempt to strangle one of the giant goats. It...doesn't work. However, as you rocket backward across the sky from Three of Seven's annoyed swat, you absorb a bit of his blood that was smeared on his hand and create another tentacle. Your main body also becomes a deep red. Your new limb twitches around a bit, as if not completely under your control.
"Don't worry I'll save you!"
Start shooting the mutants with my gun while I go to get other Dr. Bob, then drag him into our house.
4+1Good thing you packed that gun. Filled with a cold fury at the sight of your fallen duplicate, you stride out into into the yard and shoot the mutant attached to his leg directly in the forehead. It drops, and the rest of the pack swarms toward you. You calmly gun them all down one by one. The last one tries to crawl away, but you easily catch up and stomp all his DNA out. You disdainfully leave the strands in the dust and bring your ally back inside.
"I knew I chose a good ally!" Go scream at the eldritch abominations from the eldritch plane. Explain that I am also an eldritch abomination like them, and that the Seven are ancient eldritch goat demons. Aren't we all on the same side here?
6You call out to the battling abominations and claim that you're all on the same side. They listen. A hundred drooling maws open in sync.
"WE ARE THE SAME. YOU WILL CEASE TO EAT. YOU WILL JOIN WITH US. YOU WILL GIVE US A NEW UNIVERSE. YOU WILL AGREE TO THIS."
The myriad creatures around sit still, awaiting your answer. The Seven allow you to serve as their voice in this, as they are divided on what to choose. There is no movement, aside from Three batting away a tiny mote of light.
You also sense that you've forgotten how to perform rituals. You'll need to regain the memory to do them again.
GO. GET. MY MIIIIIIIIIIIIIILK!
(Argh. I really wanted to move this along.)
2You fly toward the Milk, but a very great distance lies between you. You don't make any real progress this time.
Perform blood rite of stupidity to curse goat with stupidity and inability to perform any complex actions like rituals or anything
3+1You aren't able to make him completely stupid, but you use your vampire powers to remotely enter Nuhg's mind and remove the knowledge of how to perform rituals from his brain. This should delay any more spellcasting from him.
As you perform your ritual, Silence gives you a gold star for saving him and his pet.
"By my species standards I did nothing wrong and the Doom mug problem solved itself before I even had a chance to try to solve it" walk away from the human and take a ghost taxi to tentacle monster afterlife
6You explain that you didn't do anything wrong by the standards of your culture and slither out the door. You cross through a colossal parking lot and take a taxi to your own kind's afterlife. The taxi eventually drives off a cliff and you splash down in the infinite ocean that your priests had promised. All around you, other tentacle creatures squirm and swim through the abyss. After you enjoy your reward for a bit, you see a dark shadow floating at the surface of the water. An illegal fishing boat is currently engaged in spearing and capturing your brethren's souls to make ghost-sushi.
Name: Tollanus Primus
Description: A future soldier that somehow got aboard the ship for one reason or another. Very secretive though.
Why do you want milk? A giant skeleton on a gold toilet told me to get some for him. Guess he needs to strengthen his bones?
Walk around with my giant flashlight in order to find milk on this damn spaceship
(Welcome to the thread, Lizarkar! I remember you from Piecewise's game.)
2You are Tollanus Primus. You arrived on the Moloko after the captain and AI called for reinforcements. You have been given command of Alpha Squad and Omega Squad, two special forces teams renowned as the best commandos in the Alliance. You march onto the ship and go in search of milk for the giant skeleton. You don't find any, however. It seems that the ship is out of milk.
Silence: Blinks
Silence: Looks at the bats
Silence: Looks at his badge
Silence: Looks at russian party man
Silence: Looks back at the bats
Silence: Looks back at russian party man
Silence: Gives a gold star to russian party man for saving him and douge
Silence: Takes out the list of things to do
Silence: Checks off buy snake
Silence: Looks to see what else I wrote on the list
5WANDER THROUGH THE TUNNELS ON MY ODDY NOCKY AND VIDDY WHAT SORT OF GRAZZY LEWDIES LIVE DOWN HERE.
MAYHAP ONE OF THEM COULD SKAZAT WHERE THE ROZZES WOULD MOST LIKELY HAVE TAKEN MY POOR DROOGIES?
2+1 for the information being available earlier in the thread.You leave your hiding place and go in search of someone who can lead you to your target. You meet various outcasts, fugitives, and malfunctioning robots down here. Eventually, a former securitybot who has become a street preacher to spread the word of the Great Cleaning tells you that your droogs are likely being held in the ship's brig, guarded by his former compatriots.
”Pop” the dimension bubble.
(For the record, I mean reverse its effect and put everything back in the dimension it was in before the bubble formed. I just figured that since it was referred to as a bubble, I might as well use “pop” to refer to getting rid of it.)
1You try to pop the bubble, but you run across a trap that Nuhg had written into the fabric of the dimensional knot. You feel a portion of your power drain into his magic, empowering his masters and accelerating their potential destruction of the universes.
Request crew refill and squads Alpha and Omega onboard: The Alliance's finest troops.
See if I can trace Thainos, and if not, hyperjump to the last known sector where he has been.
See if I can trace Thainos, and if not, hyperjump to the last known sector where he has been.
Aid with this.
6, 2+14GiantDad sends out the order for new troops. Along with the crew refill, the Alpha and Omega squads arrive under the command of a soldier named Tollanus Primus.
He also orders a trace on Thainos' location. At first he is unsuccessful, but then Delta steps in and calibrates the trace to incorporate experimental tachyon reformatter arrays. With the AI's help, GiantDad gets a rough idea of Thainos' location in the Void.
The Seven could devour the Eldritch Plane and the normal universe in two turns, but are waiting for direction.
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Topic: Minimalism and Milk 3 (Read 137211 times)