Turn 19Well that happened. Now get the chupathingie's milk. We need to get this movie done ASAP.
1You turn around the Thainoscopter and return to the surface of the Bazaar. When you land, you find your minions struggling to retain control of the situation. Blue Girl reports that most of those who die on either side return shortly thereafter as hostile undead. However, the resulting creatures can be permanently by a shot to the head.
Cal, down a little bit, and assess the situation. If there is even a single goat still left in this plane of existance, give it a big ‘ol middle finger, and then re-tool the cloning bay to create millions upon millions of bagels, and then teleport them into it’s body. If there are no Goats, then re-tool the Cloning bay to make slightly less bagels, and teleport them to everyone nearby or in the Moloko. Bagels for everyone!
1+1You scan for goats, but thankfully the deities and their servant have left. Since normal goats are extinct, you don't find any others in this plane. You attempt to give everyone bagels, but the overworked cloning machine shudders and sparks from the effort of producing so many wildebeest. Thankfully, the tools in your engineering hardsuit allow you to perform emergency repairs and save it from actually breaking.
Silence: Puts his F.I.N.G.E.R Gun TM away
Silence: Sits down and takes a breather
Silence: Gets back up
Silence: Gives Douge a protective parent where have you been look
Silence: Gives Douge a hug
( I'm fine with creative liberty's besides that was pretty cool honk)
2Alright, now it’s time to reestablish order.
Send out securitybots across the ship to go apprehend the “droogs”, the abomination and it’s creator, the undead, and the janitor.
(Wow, bad luck on these rolls. Sorry about that.)
3 vs 3, 1 vs 4, 1 vs 2+1, 2 vs 2, 4 vs 5You deploy securitybots across the ship in an attempt to subdue the various disruptive elements and retake control. Unfortunately, the number of simultaneous threats overwhelms their tactical processors. Your bots are defeated or fought to a draw in each case. At least the ABOMINATION and the undead are distracted for the moment.
"Now that I've released my creature into the ship and set it to killing the crew its time for me to leave and return to my home planet... you know what screw that I'm gonna get a drink."
Go steal one of the Z-wing fighters and leave the Moloko, then fly to a bar and get a drink.
4, 5You leave the fading screams of your coworkers behind you and run to the docking bay. A squad of securitybots attempts to stop you, but you fight them off with your massive gun and jump into a Z-wing. The satisfying roar of the engine sounds and you tear off into the stars. As you fly, you note that this particular Z-wing possesses advanced modifications for speed and armor. Perhaps it was constructed for an officer.
Eventually, you make it to an isolated planet to stop for a drink. This planet is fairly out of the way, so much so that nobody has agreed on a decent name for it. According to your fighter's charts, it's called Kepler-296f. There's not much going for it, but at least it has a breathable atmosphere and a few bars. You land in a small town and leave your ship. Looking around, you see the smoking remnants of a skirmish at the local graveyard.
As you get your drinks, you overhear some locals with primitive laser pistols boasting of killing monsters recently. A few have small bite wounds, but they don't seem to mind.
Attempt to find the ghosts of the Seven who died and went to what remains of hell. I mean, if death couldn't stop me then it definitely can't stop Them. Use whatever remains of my chupacabra milk to guide them to the portal connecting this world with the mortal plane.
(Fluffe's right, you don't actually have any chupacabra milk left.)
6You go to the entrance of Hell and find the spectres of Four and Three. They seem to be flickering between this world and the last. Like you, damage to their corpses has prevented their reanimation. However, they don't recognize you in their damaged state. They start twitching and floating toward you, claws and teeth bared.
T'zzzz will steal the galley and sail as far as possible fighting whatever is coming will be easier without the Leng guys coming back mid-fight
Self defense cybernetics will activate the teleport jammers and keep dragging T'zzzz to the escape pod and away from it's racist coworkers.
2, 5You turn to head for the helm of the galley, but a tentacle wraps around your ankle and trips you. You turn to see a
moon-beast crawling toward you in a quadrupedal pose. Thumps sound from the side of the ship as the Men of Leng attempt to get back on the ship.
Your cybernetics block an attempt to use a teleporter against you, narrowly fight off an attack by securitybots, toss your body into an escape pod, and jettison you into space.
Use teleporter to rapidly abduct janitor and asshole trying to kill us with genetic horrors, then teleport them to the void of space
2, 3You try to send them into space, but they escape your attacks. On the bright side, both of them send themselves into space shortly thereafter.
"No."
Enter Hell. Assert control as the highest ranking official. Close the portal and lock the goat monsters and Nuhg-Htamuhs in Hell.
1You enter Hell and descend to the remains of the Ninth Circle. All around you is a lake covered in shattered ice floes and cavern walls with holes to the void chewed into them. The souls of traitors surround you. Some appear to have been torn apart by the Seven's passing. You try to take control at the center, but then a massive stone is hurled at you. Several surviving giants and demons have begun to attack you upon realizing what you were about to do. They accuse you of being unworthy and impure due to your angelic and human sides.
Roll forward and impale their leader, then finish off the rest with my wide swings. I have poise now, so I don't care if the Droogs keep attacking me.
4 vs 5GIVE THIS GLOOPY VECK A BOOT IN THE YARBLES, THEN GET PAST HIM AND WRAP MY ROOKERS 'ROUND THE MOLOKO (THAT IS TO SAY, THE MILK I'M TRYING TO CRAST, NOT THE SHIP WE'RE ON) BEFORE ANYONE ELSE CAN INTERRUPT
MY DROOGIES WILL BE SPREADING OUT IN THE MEANTIME, READY FOR A RIGHT BEZOOMNY BITVA WHAT WITH ALL THE LEWDIES COMING AFTER US
(I was wondering when someone would point out the ship's name. I actually asked CABL shortly before we started to make sure I had the meaning right. Anyway, what's your character's name? It'd be helpful for writing your turns.)
3GiantDad bursts from the water as waves of securitybots are deployed behind him. The droogs and the securitybots fight to a standstill, leaving GiantDad and the droog leader to fight one on one. GiantDad's superior weapons, armor, and poise seem like they would win him the fight, but the droog leader gets the upper hand with a hidden dagger in his cane and drops GiantDad with a vicious kick. While GiantDad is recovering, the droog leader snatches the sentient milk from the table. It struggles against him, and the droog leader finds it difficult to control. The milk's human companion looks up in shock at the sudden battle all around him.