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[Starver]

They're shy and insecure.

[BigUglyWorm]

But why we don't meet steel colossus?

Upon ascension, their egos instantly spiral out of control, dissolving local reality and transporting them to a pocket dimension populated entirely by their own kind.  It is said that any mere mortal to venture into this SWOLEZONE would be immediately obliterated from exposure to the raw, unfiltered essence of MAD GAINS.

[methylatedspirit]

The SWOLEZONE is located many z-levels below the bottom level of the HFS. Unleashing it causes hordes of steel colossuses to swarm in from every exposed map tile. Until you kill every single one of them, you can no longer retire your fort, and the 'abandon fortress' option becomes "Give in to the SWOLE and MOOSCLES". Defeating the horde of steel colossuses causes the game to announce that your victory over the SWOLEZONE. Your fortress name will then be written in blinking text every time it is mentioned anywhere after.

[Egan_BW]

Upon breaching the swollzon, every open tile on the map counts as exposed to the swollzon, as the swollzon is beyond petty limitations of euclidean space.

[methylatedspirit]

The coordinate system just screws up and starts showing non-integer distances, the game screen starts curving, squishing and stretching in an undulating pattern, as if even the game cannot handle the sheer power of the MOOSCLES on screen and the steel colossuses are capable of doing the impossible: breaking through raised drawbridges and constructed walls.

[spazyak]

Is it bad that I think this would be a really awesome experience and that someone out there would probably find a way to not only beat the swolezone but to also colonize it

[methylatedspirit]

Tonight, we dine in the SWOLEZONE. Ohhh yes~, feel the poomp.

[BigUglyWorm]

Is it bad that I think this would be a really awesome experience and that someone out there would probably find a way to not only beat the swolezone but to also colonize it

I mean, of course they would.  Because this is Dwarf Fortress, a game where "hard" means "mundane" and "impossible" means "a fun challenge".

[spazyak]

Master work swoleman biscuits

[Criperum]

You can't colonize swoolzone because the only food there is protein cocktails and no booze. Dwarfes cannot survive there.

[Azerty]

When your fortress gets large enough, you get petitions from outside civilizations to do *something* on your land. For example, the humans or dwarves might ask to be able to use your dumping zone to drop off their own refuse.This will grant you an annual payment. How is this terrible, you ask? Sometimes theyll ask for you to give uyp a map tile from your fort. You dont know what map tile theyre asking for. When given up, you cant do ANYTHING on it, and if your dwarves path through it, it automatically starts a war. Any items on that tile instantly belong to the claiming civilization, INCLUDING artifacts. Oh, and dwarves will insist on pathing through it.

Part of this might actually be a good idea, for exemple the nearby civilization might ask to preserve a sacred place to them, or a vainquished enemy might have to destroy any fortifications in a given place.

[Kyubee]

When your fortress gets large enough, you get petitions from outside civilizations to do *something* on your land. For example, the humans or dwarves might ask to be able to use your dumping zone to drop off their own refuse.This will grant you an annual payment. How is this terrible, you ask? Sometimes theyll ask for you to give uyp a map tile from your fort. You dont know what map tile theyre asking for. When given up, you cant do ANYTHING on it, and if your dwarves path through it, it automatically starts a war. Any items on that tile instantly belong to the claiming civilization, INCLUDING artifacts. Oh, and dwarves will insist on pathing through it.

Part of this might actually be a good idea, for exemple the nearby civilization might ask to preserve a sacred place to them, or a vainquished enemy might have to destroy any fortifications in a given place.

Hence why i actively tried to make it as bad as possible

[Urist McUristUrist]

Slade can be mined. It takes a whole year with a legendary+5 miner and cannot be cancelled after the process starts. The miner will be brought food and water by other dwarves. To compensate, slade has a 666% chance to drop a boulder. However, noting can be constructed with it and it has a value multiplier of -1.

[methylatedspirit]

A multiplier of -1. Either it behaves normally*, or it underflows to 2³²-1.
*Trading slade would be at a loss to the caravan, so your mileage might vary.

[neutrino431]

Slade cannot be forbidden and is always brought to stockpiles, and is so heavy that it will destroy floors if the level below is empty, like trees.