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[NullForceOmega]

I'll take the Department of Defense, now give me three-hundred billion dollars so I can outfit our giant war-toads with power armor and rocket-assisted hammers.

[scriver]

Again: SWORDS FOR EVERYONE.

Yes, literally everyone.

Yes, literally literally.

Yes, even if you don't want a sword, it's my first step towards better gun control: learn how to use a sword, you have to be REALLY fucking mad to want to shank someone with a sword, they're scary, it's difficult, and you gotta be up close.

Yes, I said gun control, the improved coordination and such from practicing with a sword will help when you move on to learning how to assume a proper stance and learning breathing exercises are all important when properly controlling your gun, I don't know why this is so difficult but hey if I can use it as an excuse to equip children with swords we're one step closer to grade school gladiator battles uh... I mean... reduced gun crime?

It's a Minscocracy! Your slogan should be SWORDS, NOT WORDS

[Dark One]

I'll take the Department of Defense, now give me three-hundred billion dollars so I can outfit our giant war-toads with power armor and rocket-assisted hammers.

State's forests are willing to fund your research if you make varieties with chainsaws, Max^TM swords and greatly expanded back cargo space. They'll replace forest harvesters and forwarders.

[Playergamer]

complete collapse, which is a good thing.

[Egan_BW]

Hey Max™, can I have a mace instead?

[Max™]

Again: SWORDS FOR EVERYONE.

Yes, literally everyone.

Yes, literally literally.

Yes, even if you don't want a sword, it's my first step towards better gun control: learn how to use a sword, you have to be REALLY fucking mad to want to shank someone with a sword, they're scary, it's difficult, and you gotta be up close.

Yes, I said gun control, the improved coordination and such from practicing with a sword will help when you move on to learning how to assume a proper stance and learning breathing exercises are all important when properly controlling your gun, I don't know why this is so difficult but hey if I can use it as an excuse to equip children with swords we're one step closer to grade school gladiator battles uh... I mean... reduced gun crime?

It's a Minscocracy! Your slogan should be SWORDS, NOT WORDS

DONE!

Hey Max™, can I have a mace instead?

WHAT HEATHENRY IS THIS?

[Egan_BW]

D:

* Egan_BW bonks Max with a hammer.

BLUNT DAMAGE TYPES 4 LYFE

[NullForceOmega]

State's forests are willing to fund your research if you make varieties with chainsaws, Max^TM swords and greatly expanded back cargo space. They'll replace forest harvesters and forwarders.

The DoD thanks you for your offer to contribute to project Toadhammer, we look forward to working with our fellow departments.  While the integration of chainsaws may not be possible under new regulation, we are confident that your request can be honored.

Respectfully yours, SoD NullForceOmega.

[Teneb]

-snip-

Max, since clearly I was the runner-up in this election, it makes perfect sense for me to be the vice-president. Especially seeing as you don't have one. I promise to uphold your sword-only policy and not stab you in the back with one of them.

[Max™]

You're Vice Swordsident now!

D:

* Egan_BW bonks Max with a hammer.

BLUNT DAMAGE TYPES 4 LYFE

You can just grasp the blade with your gauntlet and use the crossguard as a hammer!

[Egan_BW]

Well fuck you, I'm gonna start distributing clubs to everyone. Down with the bladed tyrants! :V

[Max™]

You underestimate my power!

[Egan_BW]

You know the guy who says that gets his legs cut off, right?

[Max™]

Oh yeah? You gonna cut my legs off with that club now are ya?

Checkmate, atheists.

[Egan_BW]

* Egan_BW breaks Max's kneecaps.

Close enough.