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[wierd]

Weeaboos (western people who drown themselves in genuine, bona-fide otaku culture, japan style)  are a subset of the group I mention, and are a smaller demographic in western countries than "Gamers".

The core pathology is the same though, regardless of the specific set of interests involved.  The pathology is the lack of communication capability, lack of robust self-identity outside of an interest, and the like.

Weeabos and gamers share these criteria, more often than not.

[Doomblade187]

MGGA!

Make Gamers Great Again.

Bay12 is a good example. I recognize most of you here, don't have to worry too mich about rejection, and finding new IRL friends is rather difficult for me.

[RedKing]

Still doesn't completely answer why you kids aren't out there fucking like weasels in heat, though.

Well, it's not really worth it, is it? It does nothing sustainable for your brand or your career, it's a poor source of social capital, and it carries with it inherent risks of babies, diseases, legal entanglements and feelings.

It's just a poor return on investment, all things considered.

When "feelings" are considered a risk, that's kind of indicative of the root problem, imho. 


@nenjin: The preponderence of sites like Tinder (which is what kicked off this whole sadsack discussion, iirc) begs to differ. I mean, yeah, those sites are supposed to reduce the amount of effort and socialization needed but it still takes effort. And there's still millions upon millions of people making that effort.

Now, there's a LOT of people whose "effort" could be boiled down to sending an unsolicited dick pic with a message saying "hey bb u want fuck?" but to me that's not a symptom of some deep social disaffection or a noble, poetic soul burdened down by his own social anxiety....that's just a lazy douchebag.

[wierd]

It might also be worth investigating what actual environmental variables have changed over the cohort boundaries being discussed, and how that might affect sexual pleasure seeking.

See for instance, the radical increase in the prevalence of plastics that emit endocrine disruptors, and how these plastics have found their way into the food and water supplies in never-before-seen levels.

Then, compare that with animal studies of the endocrine disruptions of the associated chemicals.


It would stand to reason that at least SOME of the "lack of interest" might result from that as well as from changing social trends.

[smjjames]

I think the whole 'WAAAH! BIRTHRATE IS DECLINING!' is making a mountain out of a molehill. There are roughly 7.7 billion people and the population boom of the 20th century certainly isn't going to keep up the same fertility rate forever, a new equilibrium will be reached at some point.

It's certainly something notable and there will be societal ramifications, but it's not something that's going to threaten our existence as a species.

[wierd]

The god of mammon demands an ever larger increase in EVERYTHING, or "Its the END! THE END I SAY!!"


That right there has been one of the major sources of social pressure to reproduce like rabbits for a very long time.  We are reaching/have reached a point where more people is simply detrimental. (Combination of resource exhaustion, and great improvements in automation making labor obsolete, working together) But, old economists are not keeping up.  There are strong disincentives to reproduction in the modern world.

[RedKing]

Umm..guys? There's this thing called birth control?

You don't literally pop out a baby every time you put your hoohoodilly in her cha-cha. Especially with birth control.
Like, if that's the main thing keeping young people from having sex, then those abstinence-only classes are REALLY working.

[Rowanas]

I'm anxious and worried about rejection and all that, but I'm not getting laid because I'm not sexy, rather than anything more cerebral

[nenjin]

@nenjin: The preponderence of sites like Tinder (which is what kicked off this whole sadsack discussion, iirc) begs to differ. I mean, yeah, those sites are supposed to reduce the amount of effort and socialization needed but it still takes effort. And there's still millions upon millions of people making that effort.

Again, not all millenials. Plenty of people in my cohort who did the whole family, kids, suit and tie job thing. I went to college, socialized. I just didn't prioritize the same things they did. Have never wanted kids. Never even really wanted to own a house.

And there are plenty of brodudes who play CoD4 for a few hours before they hit the bar looking for bitches. So not even enjoying video games is an absolute metric. It's more what do you prioritize and what are you willing to invest your time in. Tinder is a good example. It takes slightly more effort than rubbing one out, and that effort is actual human contact for the intention of intimacy.

Maybe that's partially what it boils down to, is real intimacy. People are happy to have sex, in whatever form be that in front of a computer screen using Chaturbate, Tinder where you don't actually want to know the other person, or a drunken "wanna bang" bar hook up. But these things aren't real, lasting intimacy. And maybe that's what people are actually shying away from. Reserving that 40% of themselves that they're not going to share with someone. Either out of shame, apathy, fear or whatever. I know for me that my ideal person is one who understands escapism without judging it.

Like, if that's the main thing keeping young people from having sex, then those abstinence-only classes are REALLY working.

Birth control doesn't always work though. Men get lazy, condoms break, women can change their mind about birth control without telling their partner....I'd like to think millenials (generally speaking) have a sense of responsibility about childbirth. They don't want kids they aren't ready to have, they don't want the responsibility for a life if they aren't sure they're totally in control of their's, and that may delay or deny the mid-life desire to raise a family.

[Maximum Spin]

Umm..guys? There's this thing called birth control?

You don't literally pop out a baby every time you put your hoohoodilly in her cha-cha. Especially with birth control.
Like, if that's the main thing keeping young people from having sex, then those abstinence-only classes are REALLY working.

It's not.

The main thing keeping young people from having sex is that sex is not actually that important or exciting, especially when the people trying hardest to convince you to have more of it are the media and your parents.

[wierd]

@ Rowandas

^ DING.

Again, there is a major issue with negative self-image, which makes people believe that they are undesirable.  (Even in the face of seeing some DAMNED FUGLY people getting married and having kids.  The notion that "Dayum, that ugly toad had it work out? Why can't I then?!" does not seem to dawn nearly enough-- again, I blame the communication feedback loop problem I mentioned prior, and the position taking of the MSM to dominate the discussion and stack the deck to create unnecessary and pathological "controversy".)

[Trekkin]

Like, if that's the main thing keeping young people from having sex, then those abstinence-only classes are REALLY working.

I think the main thing is that it's just not worth the time investment. Best-case scenario, you experience some ephemeral joy while risking all sorts of ruinous biological and legal consequences. Worst-case scenario, you're emotionally invested in someone else's well-being, and everyone breaks down into violent insanity or burdensome uselessness eventually.

[wierd]

For me, it is a combination of these things:

1) a lack of intrinsic desire. (which seems to be on the rise. Again, a look at the epidemiology of endocrine disruptors in the environment should NOT be overlooked.)
2) Understanding and acceptance that I am indeed "An asshole", that does not meet the norms typically seen in popular media about what constitutes a good mate. (EG, I know I would push more angry buttons than happy buttons.)
3) The existence of a stacked deck as relates to consequences of engaging that activity, in both directions. (Women have it stacked biologically, men have it stacked socio-economically)

In the end calculus, it just is not worth all the negative products, so why even entertain the idea?

[Reelya]

One modern issue is the lack of organized ways of meeting people as this article points out:

In days gone by, we had rituals such as dances and balls and socials, where interaction was expected, humiliation mitigated. Men and women were brought into contact by customs.

More recent options is that everyone gets hammered on piss in nightclubs with music so loud you can't even think, let alone talk to anyone. And if you read articles about where to meet women some of the advice was goddamn laughable, like "meet them in the vegetable aisle in the supermarket" sort of shit (which is a whole genre of advice apparently. Google "how to meet women in the supermarket"). No wonder people aren't meeting people if hanging out like a creep in the supermarket is a viable alternative to terrible drunk nightclubs.

This is one thing we don't normally consider. How goddamn disorganized the whole "meeting potential mates" thing actually became from the 1970s onwards. Other advice like "go to D&D nights if you like D&D and you might meet your D&D playing soulmate there" are equally terrible. you're like to meet someone either ugly or already attached to someone else, and that's if you don't end up in the 99% of groups with almost all dudes.

[RedKing]

Yeesh. I genuinely feel sorry for y'all, then.
I'm not trying to reverse-slut-shame (prude-shame?) or anything, but dayum. When the main reason for not having sex is "Meh, what's the point?" there's some serious depression going on, imho.

You have out-slacked the slacker generation.