"Hello," I greet the woman. "I've been recruited by the minders to help solve the stoat situation. Would you or anyone you know be interested in helping me? We need brains more than brawn here, so it's fine if you aren't a fighter."
Oh, she says. You need not even ask. Of course she will help to the best of her ability. Perhaps the master will, too. He is not in at the moment. But she can take you to him nevertheless. Your request is both urgent and worthy - surely it merits his attention.
She opens the door wider, inviting you in with an accommodating expression.
"There are many advantages again! So... who makes the financial decisions for your employers? That is who would have to decide."
So can I get out yet?
[Impeccable Timing: 6]
Before the guards can give you a response, the captain of the royal guard turns up. She looks at you in puzzlement, then at the guards. When she told them to leave some for later, she didn't quite expect this much, truth be told. The other guards lower their heads in shame as the once-jolly guard explains that they seem to be incapable of harming you in any way for no adequately explicable reason. On the other hand, they did have an enlightening chat with you - say, has the captain heard about at thing called workers' compensation? With most of the country gone and all, it seems like it might be time to renegotiate-
That sounds like stoat-spread seditious treason, the captain retorts, and they will desist in speaking of such things immediately. One of the sisters tries to raise a reasonable objection, but her thoughts seem to have tripped somewhere on the way to her mouth, and so she makes only so much dissatisfied noise.
The captain opts to ignore them as she turns to you. You seem to have driven her guards to grossly uncharacteristic behavior, and she demands an immediate explanation.
"Welp. Time to try this thing."
Grab onto boulder. Levitate boulder upwards to or through a hole, and exit Elevator Rock to a landing/roof. If at any point I fall off boulder, MOON to migitate falling damage.
[Flight of the Shining Stone: 3]
You grab onto the shining stone. It is uncomfortably hot, you find. Despite this fact, you figure you ought to be fine for a couple of minutes. There aren't really handholds available, so you flop onto it and let it carry you upward. It does so to the best of its ability, letting you slowly float over to the lowest available hole. At this point you're feeling somewhat like an egg on a steadily heating frying pan, so you decide to get off this wild ride of yours.
[Uncommon Acrobatics: 2]
It is, however, a little difficult to get in position for a good jump here. Standing atop the stone, you look at the distressingly small alcove you're ostensibly aiming for. Then you look down. It's a long fall, true, but not long enough to call upon the power of the Moon, you think. At least not to a useful degree (only so much that 0.16 Gs can do for a man already moving at 9.8 m/s, one could say). And the boulder seems to be having trouble standing still. You notice this, and it notices you noticing, becoming more nervous and starting to fidget even more.
"Ha!" Leif points Daniels. "Ha ha!" He laughs at Codeburn. "The fuck is that?" He points the boulder. "Very nice balloon! Oh, by the way, people here are batshit crazy."
Hear MOON. Remember it. Absorb it. Ask the kiddo where minders at. Maybe study the prison stone here where it is not so dark.
Moon! Moon? Moon. You remember it just fine. It's a word. Not really a strain on your mental faculties to remember a single word, is it?
Anyway, the helpful kiddo looks to have gone missing, so asking him anything doesn't seem like a terribly likely proposition. So you just take out your stone and take a closer look at it. It's not really much brighter in here than in the dungeon, you find. Might have something to do with no light sources and the way there aren't any windows.
[Mineral Examination: 1]
It's some kind of geode, you think. Except inverted - semi-precious bits on the outside, black stuff on the inside. You're not a geologist, so hell if you know how that works.
"Did you just say 'by the way' as an acronym? Who even uses those things outside of texting? Is that a new trend that I missed in my developing alcoholism before I got booted over here? Man, things get wierd quick.
Well, good luck lasering that army. When you're done, come help me get the window out if you want, I think the end result's gonna be pretty badass."
Look around this wizard tower. Anything that look like, I dunno, a wizard book to get spells from? Jack no know how metaphysics work here.
Make sure to keep an eye on Codeburn and step out of the way if he or the giant boulder fall. Or show signs of exploding like he did before.
[Looter's Instincts: 3]
Well, you see vast amounts of fuck-all in this hall. Considering you could just wander in here without repercussion or observation, you'd say this makes sense. You don't put your valuables in places where any old nonce can just wander in and steal them. In fact, if you had to guess, then those holes in the ceiling that Mr. Codeburn is trying to get to with his boulder probably lead to the part of the tower that the actual wizarding happens in. The lack of stairs in this case strikes you as deliberate. Wizards, you know. In fact-
Wait, you notice something. Not anything lying around, mind you. You see Mr. Erikson fondling and examining a small object over on one side of the hall. Normally you would avert your eyes at such discoveries, but you think he may actually have something valuable there. Unfortunately, you think he also probably knows it.
Eric Codeburn, COMPUTISTICS SPECIALIST
- Floral Nightgown (worn)
- A Word: SUN
- A Word: MOON
- Anglefork Castle: Minister of Moronic Affairs
- The Impromptu Prophecy: Child of the Sun and Moon
- Adherents of the Great House: Enemy of Memory
- Well and Truly Narked Upon: 1
- Friends in Low Places: a Successful Transaction
- Subordinate Shining Stone (guarding, 2 tons)
- Army of the New State: 600 Stoatmen
- Army of the New State: !!!!
- The Good Doctor: the Solitary Candidate
Leif Erikson, Miner
- Reappropriated, Clean Skirt
- 1 gp
- Anglefork Castle: A Free Man
- The Box: an Amicable Parting
- Tower of the Mind: Number Two
- Induced Lucidity: An Example Realm
- The Prison Stone
- Elongated Affairs: A Noble Task
- Elongated Affairs: The Numbers of the Stoat
Eileen Minett, Vinyl Collector
- A Word: HUNGER
- A Weapon: Explosive Cysts
- Queenly Garments: the Humble Dress (damaged)
- Sticks: 0.95 (total)
- Rat Pantheon: Disliked
- Traces of Mischief: Mouthful of Blackness
- The New Queen: ?
- Origins: Witness to Dissolution
- Tower of the Mind: There's Something To Remember
- Gross Incandescence: Highly Illuminated
- Inscribed Brick ('Water')
- The Voracious Dark: Two Connections Given
- Body Count: 1
- Army of the New State: !!!!
- Never In: Rising to the Call
Jack Daniels, Karate Man
- Wounds: 1
- Voluntarily Naked
- The Winding Path of Inspiration: the Sword of Destiny
- The Winding Path of Inspiration: Something Priceless?
- The Winding Path of Inspiration: Something Purple?
- The Winding Path of Inspiration: A Profane Megalith
- Doomstones: Efficient Conclusion
- A Place In History: Emergent Abomination
- Anglefork Castle: the Great Serpent
- 2 rats, crushed
- 1 rat, strangled
- 1 rat, live
- Gross Incandescence: Unilluminated
- Travels In The Fourth Dimension: Sunday ± 2 Days
- The Impromptu Prophecy: Sol In Absentia
- Body Count: 1
Thomas Minstep, Insurance Agent
- Anglefork Castle: Deluded Resident
- Traces of Mischief: Sandy Groin
- Gross Incandescence: Partly Illuminated
- Tight Leather Pants
- Travels In The Fourth Dimension: Friday, July 23rd, 409 S.D.
- The Majordomo: Happy to Help
- The Queen's Guard: the Captain's Attention