Round 34: Conquistador by the DozenLocation: Denmark, WisconsinWeather Conditions: Snow (12.5 inches)Time: Dawn Elephant Parade asks the police officers overwatching the relief effort to attach some sort of identification to his horse so that he can retrieve it later. "Yeah, sure, I'll keep an eye for him," the officers says halfheartedly as he pays more attention to the stuff going on around than to Elephant specifically. Elephant moves away to a more secluded to spot to reload his Musket out of the eyesight of any civilians. While he does this, he spots a man too lightly dressed for this type of weather, driving into the general area of the camp. He's huge, more muscular than any person Elephant had seen in person, and he's carrying some sort of metallic object with him...
"Well I was kinda the chap who went to Green Bay and convinced them to send relief so why the sports car may not have much room I'm willing to help to the best of my ability." After Abstract replies to him, the police officer sneers, "You're the one that got all of this to happen? You and that beat up hooptie? Give me a break...Why don't you wiggle around and see if you can fit a couple people in here, huh?"
After he walks away, Autumn fumes, "Wow, they're awfully rude around here aren't they?"
A middle-aged woman and two small children come to the side of the car. "Do you have room for passengers?"
Greatness walks back into the Pet Food aisle and begins rifling around in the supplies of the militia painfully expiring. The man says something unintelligible under his ragged breathing and shakes his arms in an attempt to do something, but is to weak to stop Greatness or ask for help. (+Portable Radio, AR15 Assault Rifle) Relieving the dying man of his most valuable possessions, Greatness goes back to the front of the store and alerts his teammates.
"Halt. If someone saw the flash of the arms, or heard the crack of ammunition flying through the air, we may have company. And in any case, things will get interesting." He slides up a wall until he reaches one of the large glass windows, peeking out into the street and trying to do as little as possible to expose himself to anyone that may be out there. (Perception:8 ) Greatness spots a nondescript vehicle with multiple riders heading towards the direction of the grocery, in less than a minute they would pass by the entrance.
Hawk digs into some more vegetables to cure his various status ailments, returning his body to 100% function. He then refills the two bags with enough vegetables from the Produce section to keep him going for a while. Running into a grocery of all places was good fortune for him. He then attempts to fix Ukrainian's arm, but due to the severity of her injury, he decides that trying to fix it now would most likely injure her further. Even rudimentary or improvised medical supplies would help him greatly in this endeavor.
"Yes, you're probably right. Well, let's move out." Person drives the Spudmobile in the direction of the fired shots and continues down the street, the various shops and facilities on what was once a fairly business downtown avenue now deserted, giving the place an eerie feeling. (Perception: 4) Both Person and his companion peer through the windows of the various stores but fail to spot any other people.
Execute sends a small battalion of soldiers to the captured ship to loot it for any precious cargo. The reports come back highly positive; because the ship was captured and there was little fighting on board, most of the stuff on the ship is still salvageable and fine to use. The food, ale, weapons, equipment and luxury items are all still intact.
Execute then finds the Conquistador prisoners and gives them an ultimatum: either be executed or brave a new world where they may have a shot at attaining freedom. Jubilant that they won't be scalped or burned alive like their fellow Spainiards, all twelve of them readily accept. They are led, at spear-and-bow point, to the portal that Execute had originally traversed to get to the Aztec world. When they enter the Mansion, all twelve of them stop, and so do all of the Aztec warriors accompany them. The 16th century peoples are in awe of every element of the mansion, both parties stare at the painting of the Aztec-Spanish War, realizing that they have been portrayed. Yuri keeps balance, "We must continue, these things will be explained in due time!" He gives Execute a subtle look that no one else would understand, but Execute translates his facial language as, 'We're going to have to explain to the Aztecs what they're doing in a early 20th century mansion, in addition to them seeing a portal that leads back to our modern world'.
Everyone stands before the swirling purple portal, which leads right to where Execute and Yuri originated from, the image of Denmark glowing before them. Execute gives the Conquistadors one final speech, "Good luck; while you may think of the Aztecs as barbarians, the men and women you encounter beyond the portal are one hundred times more vicious and powerful, equipped with technology and arcane abilities you could not even imagine. It is a world where there are great metal boats travelling the skies, guns can shoot one hundred bullets without reloading, and a person in France can talk to a person in England without leaving their home." About half of the Conquistadors look like they regret their decision, but it's much too late for that though. As the spears prod at their backsides, the dozen of them step through. The outcome are twelve very confused Spainiards standing in a lot where the Art Shop once was, trying to get their bearings together.
After this is complete, Execute and Yuri lead the Aztecs back to the homeworld; despite being skilled and fearless warriors, all of the group appears shaken by what they have seen, their response ranging anywhere from total silence to having an existential emotional breakdown. Once again, Execute attempts to distribute Muskets and Metal Armor looted from the Spanish Warship to his army, but they still prefer to keep their more familiar weaponry and equipment. They do however express interest in cannons, and wish to harness the power of the exotic weapons that can destroy an entire building in one shot.
Execute then sends regiments of his army to the tribes surrounding the Aztec Empire to tell them of the coming of Amihiyotzinuatmotlapal:
(6) The Texcocans of the North do believe that a great spirit has indeed visited the Aztec, however, they tell them that they have a great spirit of their own. When Execute hears of this, he visits the Texcocans who's Emperor is impressed with his ability of flight and leadership abilities. He then introduces Ihiyo-Contlati, a self proclaimed spirit who is able to breathe fire, and performs an impressive display of it. Everyone is impressed, even Execute's Aztec entourage, and he leaves feeling a little jealous of a guy with a slightly cooler power.
(8 ) One the other hands, The Tacubans have no such great spirit and are excited to hear of their neighbors acquiring one. They plan to send the King some of his advisers to Tenochtitlan to meet Amihiyotzinuatmotlapal.
(6-2[Hostile Rivals]) The Artawa have been rivals of the Aztecs for centuries, a time that has seen several wars between the two tribes. The Artawa have even allied themselves with the Spanish in order to fight the Aztecs. When they are told of a great spirit who can fly, they balk at the Aztecs and say that should the great spirit come to them himself, they will shoot him with a hundred arrows before he can land. The Aztecs are able to leave with a cold reception, but fortunately no fighting occurred and they were able to relay the Artawa's threat to Execute before he made his journey.
Ukrainian loots Nunzillor of her devices, (+Katana, Portable Radio, Skiing Mask) before leaning on a wall and groaning in a mix of fatigue and sleepiness.
"I think we need to get out of the town to Green Bay and get some rest." It is true that since she had arrived, the store owner had not a single second of rest.
The second and final evacuation of Denmark civilians has begun.
New Quest: Conquistador Catastrophe
A dozen New World Conquistadors have found themselves in an even Newer World. Even if their technology is old-school, their cohesion and fighting ability is not. Can any of our Wiki-Warriors take them down?
Conditions:
*Kill the Conquistadors before they get out of Denmark! If left totally unimpeded, they could exit the town's borders in 3-4 turns. If a single Conquistador escapes, the Quest immediately ends with no winner.
*The winner of this Quest is the player with the most Conquistador Points after they have all been killed; One Conquistador = One Conquistador Point. Converting a Conquistador to your side counts as a "Kill". In the case of a tie, whoever gets the final kill is considered the winner.
Target:
Conquistadors Squad
Attributes: +1 Muskets, +1 Shortswords
Equipment: Muskets, Spanish Shortswords, Metal Armor
Status: 12/12
Name: Execute/Dumbo.exe "Amihiyotzinuatmotlapal"
Gender: Male
Nationality: Iranian/Russian
Karaindash: +2 Administration, +2 Diplomacy
Rufa Mae Quinto: +2 Acting, +2 Singing
The Other Face of Janus: +Ability: Trans-dimensional Painting Transportation
Arman Sedghi: +2 Engineering
Sviatopolk I of Kiev: +2 Military Strategy, +2 Assassination, +Loyal Boyar Subject
Status: Fine
Kills: 0
Assets: Loyal Boyar Subject (Dagger, High Priest Robes), Shortsword
Abilities:
Trans-dimensional Painting Transportation - Can open up portals in paintings to travel in and out of them. A strange and enigmatic power, use it carefully.
Wings of Quetzalcoatl - Can fly.
Vessel: The Aztec Empire (Aztec Emperor)
Army:
87 Generals
309,000 Aztec Soldiers
Standard War Party Equipment - Bows, Obsidian Spears, Cloth Armor, Hardwood Helmets
Looted European Equipment: Muskets, Crossbows, Rapiers, Steel Armor, Steel Helmets
Name: Twinwolf
Gender: Male
Nationality: English/Yugoslavian
Johnny Strange: +2 Juggling, +2 Marksmanship, +Abilities: Black Hole Swallow Technique + Fire-breath Manipulator
Sluggish schizophrenia: +2 Psychological Torture
Dimitrije Ljotić: +2 Nationalistic Leadership, +2 Law, +Judge's Suit
Black Thunder: +Black Thunder Chocolate Bar (When a bite of the bar is taken, lightning will randomly strike in the nearby area)
Kartouwe: +Kartouwe Cannon
Status: Normal
Assets: Judge's Suit, Black Thunder Chocolate Bar (When a bite of the bar is taken, lightning will randomly strike in the nearby area), Kartouwe Cannon
Abilities:
Black Hole Swallow Technique - Swallows any dangerous weapon or object that can fit inside his stomach with no negative effects.
Fire-breath Manipulator - Inhales a nearby source of fire and then can breathe it out of his mouth.
Name: Hawk132
Gender: Male
Nationality: Chilean
Lucho Gatica: +2
Bolero Dancing, +2 Acting
Vegetable juice: +Ability: Juice Up!
Jim Webb: +2 Naval Ability, +2 Politics, +Politican's Suit, +Ability: I want my 10 Minutes!
Bongolo: +2 Medic, +2 Romance
North American cuisine: +2 Cooking American Cuisine, +Grill
Status: Fine
Assets: Politician's Suit, Grill, Riot Gun [4/6], Police Pistol [4/9], 2 Plastic Bags of Vegetables
Abilities:
Juice Up - Can instantly turn any vegetable he comes in contact to into juice. Also, metabolizes vegetable juice very quickly to the point it can actually heal him. E.g., 10 Juiced carrots = 1 Medkit.
I want my 10 Minutes! (Passive) - Constantly demands to have a full, uninterrupted ten minutes so that he can say what he wants. Super effective against Anderson Cooper.
Name: AbstractTraitorHero
Gender: Male
Nationality: English/American
Aston Martin DP212: +Aston Martin DP212 Sports Car
Joel Halliwell: +2 Horseback Riding, +2 Inspiration, +English WWI Uniform
Dzhamal Otarsultanov: +2 Wrestling
Ira Shafer: +2 Law, +2 Politics
Jon Denning: +2 Driving
Status: Normal
Assets: Aston Martin DP212 Sports Car, English WWI Uniform, Green Bay Amateur Wrestling Champion Belt
Love Interest - Autumn [Smitten]
Name: Ukrainian Ranger
Gender: Female
Nationality: American
Gerri Elliot: +2 Business, +Business Suit
Alwyn Bramley-Moore: +2 Politics, +2 Writing, +2 WWI Combat
Henri Bouillard: +2 Theology
J.C. Penny: +2 Business (+4 Total), +1 J.C. Penny Store in the Green Bay Area
Chad Power: +2 Martial Arts
Joseph Solvinto: +2 Boxing (+3 Punching Total)
+Article:
Joseph Mössmer: +2 Neoclassical Painting & Instruction
Status: Left Forearm Fractured [-2 to Two-handed Actions], Bruised Nose
Kills: 2
Assets: Business Suit, 1 J.C. Penny Store in the Green Bay Area, Katana, Portable Radio, Skiing Mask
Name: Greatness942
Gender: Male
Nationality: Japanese/French
Regenerative Medicine: +Ability: Enhanced Regeneration
2005 Asian Athletics Championships – Men's javelin throw: +2 Javelin-Throwing, +2 Javelins
Tōdō Heisuke: +2 Swords, +Katana, +Wakizashi, +Samurai Armor
The Misadventures of Merlin Jones: +Mindwarper Helmet
Michel Boivin: +2 History & Anthropology (+3 Muslim History & Anthropology)
Magdalena Piekarska: +2 Fencing (+3 Swords Total), +Rapier
Status: Normal
Kills: 1
Assets: 2 Javelins, Katana, Wakizashi, Rapier, Portable Radio, AR15 Assault Rifle [26/30]
Abilities:
Enhanced Regeneration - Body heals from wounds and recovers from diseases much faster than normal human beings.
Name: Salsacookies
Gender: Male
Nationality: Italian/Greek
Marco Bortolami: +2 Tackling
Songo River Queen II: +Songo River Queen II Riverboat
David J. Rudolph: +2 Scholarly Writing (+3 Scholarly Writing on Judaism)
Revolving Door: +Ability: Revolving Door Revolution
Perikles Kakousis: +2 Strength, +Barbell, +Olympian Weightlifter's Garb
Status: Fine
Assets: Songo River Queen II Riverboat, Barbell Hammer (Requires exceptional Strength to wield), Olympian Weightlifter's Garb, Snowmobile, Grenade Launcher [6/6]
Abilities:
Revolving Door Revolution - Once per turn, can turn a normal door into a revolving door.
Name: "Dad" Person
Gender: Male
Nationality: American
Borscht Film Festival: +2 Directing, +2 Film Knowledge
William H. Hay: +2 Large Scale Infantry Tactics, +2 Trench Warfare, +2 WWI-Era Firearms, +1 Swords, +2 Horseback Riding, +M1911 Pistol, +WWI Officer's Sword, +WWI General's Uniform, +Ally: Buffalo Soldier, +Nickname: "Dad"
Blackfoot Idaho: +Gargantuan Mobile Potato
Sérvulo Gutiérrez: +2 Painting
Laki Pingvini: +2 New Wave/Synthpop/Pop Rock Music
Status: Fine
Assets: M1911 Pistol [7/7], WWI Officer's Sword, WWI General's Uniform, Gargantuan Mobile Potato (Giant Saddle, Steering Wheel, 6 Wheels, Motor)
Allies: Buffalo Soldier (M1903 Springfield Rifle [5/5], Trench Knife, WWI Infantry Uniform, WWI Helmet)
Conquistador Catastrophe
A dozen New World Conquistadors have found themselves in an even Newer World. Even if their technology is old-school, their cohesion and fighting ability is not. Can any of our Wiki-Warriors take them down?
Conditions:
*Kill the Conquistadors before they get out of Denmark! If left totally unimpeded, they could exit the town's borders in 3-4 turns. If a single Conquistador escapes, the Quest immediately ends with no winner.
*The winner of this Quest is the player with the most Conquistador Points after they have all been killed; One Conquistador = One Conquistador Point. Converting a Conquistador to your side counts as a "Kill". In the case of a tie, whoever gets the final kill is considered the winner.
Target:
Conquistadors Squad
Attributes: +1 Muskets, +1 Shortswords
Equipment: Muskets, Spanish Shortswords, Metal Armor
Status: 12/12
You know, that seems so obvious in retrospect. I'll get on that as soon as possible.
Edit: Here we go.
Announcer 1: This is Graham Warren.
Announcer 2: And this is Van Harrison.
Graham: And you're watching the Wikipedia Warfare Report.
Van: The only place to get updated on the only sport worth watching.
Graham: Individual analysis of every combatant, examination of their tactics, and live updates on the state of the arena.
Van: Its all right here, on WWR.
*Opening fanfare.*
Graham: As you can see, we're back in action after a little bit of technical difficulties. *Pointed glare at Van*
Van: Well that's all in the past right? Let's just get down to business, they've been waiting long enough.
Graham: *Sigh* Right. So, the action in the grocery store still hasn't died down. The remaining members of Nunzillor's rebellion are dying left and right, and Greatness still doesn't have a scratch on him. Hawk and Ukranian Ranger have made a good decision, allying with Greatness. This team has it all!
Van: From here, I'd go about finding proper medical treatment. That store's stock of veggies won't last forever.
Graham: Another good idea would be to stock up on more weapons and armor, along with other supplies. If Greatness is willing to share, this wild ensemble will be quite the reckoning.
Van: The noise they're making might draw in other warriors though, so they're not quite in the clear yet.
Graham: Execute has effectively completed their war in the painting. The conquistadors have been repelled, and now the only question remaining is "Where will he go next?"
Van: Now that he's destroyed his opposition, earning the complete loyalty of the Aztec army, he should start making his way back into Denmark. It may be difficult for them to mobilize their forces, but if Execute manages to take control of Denmark, that might change things considerably, as all new warriors have to visit the town.
Graham: That's a good point. I'll note that if I were Execute right now, I would be a part of the invasion into Denmark.
Van: Why's that? Surely they'd be safer inside the painting?
Graham: That's true, but its a calculated risk. Although it would be safer to remain in the painting, sending forces to scout outside the painting might not be the best choice. The modern world is an entirely foreign environment to their soldiers, so Execute's guidance will probably be key when it comes to any complex orders.
Van: Let's move on to some of our less fearsome warriors for a bit.
Graham: High tyrol's plan seems rather lackluster. I'm not sure why they thought they'd be able to sell their plane at the airport, nor why they would want a helicopter instead.
Van: That's puzzling me too. Their plane is armed, and acquiring a helicopter with any armaments at all, let alone good ones is probably out of their reach, unless they manage to contact the government or military. Perhaps the police will have something to suit their needs?
Graham: Meanwhile, ATH's decision to join the Denmark relief efforts could serve them well in the future. Sure, a sports car isn't the best vehicle for the job, but it is not like they're going to turn down charity.
Van: Any amount of help... helps. That sounded better in my head.
Graham: Anyway. If I were ATH, I would keep helping the relief forces. Not necessary out of empathy, though that would be a part of it, but because the relief forces might have them transport supplies.
Van: That's certainly something they could use to their advantage.
Graham: Elephant Parade is back and ready for action. My recommendations for Elephant Parade are firstly that they reload their musket. Really, that's been bothering me.
Van: You too? A warrior should always be ready for combat. That's why them not keeping their weapon loaded is a bad idea.
Graham: Secondly, it may be wise for them to find extra weapons in case they are disarmed, particularly swords.
Van: Or, if they were to find a local reenactment group, they could find support there instead.
Graham: Twinwolf still seems to be spacing about. Maybe that shopkeeper should give they a nudge.
Van: Indecision is the enemy!
Graham: Right, back to the other warriors who seem interested in fighting.
Van: You know, we probably shouldn't have put Elephant Parade in the not threatening category. He did kill a man shortly after he joined, you know.
Graham: Oh right. I suppose that wasn't really fair of me. Well, its a bit late for that now isn't it? Anyway, Salsacookies and Dad seem to have ignored each other. Or well, it wasn't exactly mutual. Dad certainly attempted contact, but Salsacookies was uninterested. They both seem distracted with their own goals.
Van: Any idea what those goals might be?
Graham: Well, Salsacookies might go for the Dead Rising strategy here.
Van: What's that again?
Graham: Strap deadly weapons onto vehicles. I'm referring to his barbell here.
Van: Oh right.
Graham: That's probably what I would do in this situation. Only time will tell how long it takes them to find the required materials.
Van: Or how long before someone interrupts them.
Graham: Indeed. Anyway, Dad seems to be making their way towards the sound of gunfire. Not much self preservation instinct there, eh?
Van: Do you think that gunfire might be from the grocers? They could find allies there.
Graham: If it is the grocers, diplomacy is key. With his loyal buffalo soldier by his side, it would be a 2v3 fight, but that doesn't even the odds much when one of those 3 is Greatness, invincible samurai extraordinaire. If he does end up fighting that group, using his vehicle's speed would be key to victory.
Van: Likewise, his opponents would benefit from breaking the wheels or the engine on the spudmobile.
Graham: The vehicle in question does have a decent top speed. Combined with two firearms to attack with, they'll probably be able to make an escape if worst comes to worst. Offering them a ride on his vehicle may actually be a good incentive for teamwork, as they are lacking in transport.
Van: Anything else Dad does hinges on what they find when they reach their destination. Well, I think that wraps things up for now.
Graham: Don't even think about it. We'll see you all next time.
Van: I really am sorry about that, you know.
Graham: Good.
Van: We're out. Stay tuned in to WWR for all the latest news about this great battle.
Is that better?
(Also, Twinwolf hasn't posted here in quite a while. I'd poke them by pm if you haven't already TCM. I'd do it myself, but that seems presumptuous.)
This is top quality. I will PM Twinwolf.
(I, uh, don't mean to be rude or anything, but it's been two days. If you want some help, Salsacookies, High Tyrol and Twinwolf are the only ones who haven't updated. I'm okay with people taking their time, really I am, but there's been no activity for two days. I'm just saying. I really will be patient, it's just, when something doesn't update for a while, I get really antsy and keep going back to check and see if something's happened of not.)
I get it, the first day I could've put a turn up only 6 out of 10 people had posted, so I wanted to give everyone some more time to post. Yesterday was just hectic. Sorry for the wait. Also, no turn on Friday or Saturday, and about 50% chance of a turn on Sunday. Making sure to tell everyone in advance this time before my turns are delayed.
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