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Help me get better at DMing: is this game way, way too wordy?

Holy shit yes
- 0 (0%)
Slightly less long-winded would be better.
- 0 (0%)
No, it's fine as it is.
- 6 (60%)
I am dangerously insane and demand an excess of words. Double the length of each update.
- 4 (40%)

Total Members Voted: 10


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Author Topic: [ISG] Teovanth  (Read 23025 times)

Worldmaster27

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #120 on: April 23, 2015, 10:03:20 pm »

Check to see if we have a blindfold in front of us or something with our hands. Blink a few times.
Good idea. +1
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Andres

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #121 on: April 23, 2015, 10:04:51 pm »

Check to see if we have a blindfold in front of us or something with our hands. Blink a few times.
+1. If we don't, try magic.
We can't just "do magic" because we're a geometrist.
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All fanfics are heresy, each and every one, especially the shipping ones. Those are by far the worst.

ShadowHammer

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #122 on: April 23, 2015, 10:16:29 pm »

Check to see if we have a blindfold in front of us or something with our hands. Blink a few times.
+1. If we don't, try magic.
We can't just "do magic" because we're a geometrist.
...Why not?

Sorry if I wasn't clear, but I meant attempt to scratch the simplest spell we know into the surroundings.
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Andres

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #123 on: April 23, 2015, 11:25:10 pm »

Check to see if we have a blindfold in front of us or something with our hands. Blink a few times.
+1. If we don't, try magic.
We can't just "do magic" because we're a geometrist.
...Why not?

Sorry if I wasn't clear, but I meant attempt to scratch the simplest spell we know into the surroundings.
There we go. That's what I was looking for. ;D
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All fanfics are heresy, each and every one, especially the shipping ones. Those are by far the worst.

ATHATH

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #124 on: April 24, 2015, 09:19:28 am »

Check to see if we have a blindfold in front of us or something with our hands. Blink a few times.
+1. If we don't, try magic.
We can't just "do magic" because we're a geometrist.
...Why not?

Sorry if I wasn't clear, but I meant attempt to scratch the simplest spell we know into the surroundings.
There we go. That's what I was looking for. ;D
+1
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Seriously, ATHATH, we need to have an intervention about your death mug problem.
Quote
*slow clap* Well ATHATH congratulations. You managed to give the MC a mental breakdown before we even finished the first arc.
I didn't even read it first, I just saw it was ATHATH and noped it. Now that I read it x3 to noping

FallacyofUrist

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #125 on: April 26, 2015, 03:50:22 pm »


Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I think I want this for my avatar. Is it okay?



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FoU has some twisted role ideas. Screw second-guessing this mechanical garbage spaghetti, I'm basing everything on reads and visible daytime behaviour.

Would you like to play a game of Mafia? The subforum is always open to new players.

Araph

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #126 on: April 28, 2015, 04:22:59 pm »

So I think we're dead.

Try ascending to Lichhood. Failing that, become a ghost. Failing THAT, just go to the afterlife.


You briefly consider dying, but think better of it.


As you come to your senses, pain washes through your body. You reconsider your decision to not die.


Check to see if we have a blindfold in front of us or something with our hands. Blink a few times.
+1. If we don't, try magic.
We can't just "do magic" because we're a geometrist.
...Why not?

Sorry if I wasn't clear, but I meant attempt to scratch the simplest spell we know into the surroundings.


In a delirious haze of pain and panic, you attempt to magic your way out of the situation by scratching a explosive rune onto the nearest surface at hand. After a moment, your brain processes that you're clawing weakly at whatever seems to be carrying you.

You take a moment to catalogue the various scrapes and bruises you accumulated during your descent. Your left arm hurts a lot. You don't think it's broken, but you're no doctor. Your ribs and left leg are in similar amounts of pain, but everything seems to be more or less functional. Your head aches and everything looks too bright. A vague feeling of nausea is pervasive.


"Can you walk?"





Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I think I want this for my avatar. Is it okay?

Absolutely!

We can't just "do magic" because we're a geometrist.

You can do some magic (little things like projecting basic runes or creating a weak light source), but not much.
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Worldmaster27

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #127 on: April 28, 2015, 04:33:09 pm »

"Ugh...

I-I don't know... who are you?"
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FallacyofUrist

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #128 on: April 28, 2015, 04:58:40 pm »

"Ugh...

I-I don't know... who are you?"

+1, most likely not.
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FoU has some twisted role ideas. Screw second-guessing this mechanical garbage spaghetti, I'm basing everything on reads and visible daytime behaviour.

Would you like to play a game of Mafia? The subforum is always open to new players.

Andres

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #129 on: April 28, 2015, 09:07:11 pm »

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All fanfics are heresy, each and every one, especially the shipping ones. Those are by far the worst.

Pencil_Art

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Prophet

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #131 on: April 29, 2015, 04:38:48 pm »

"Ugh...

I-I don't know... who are you?"

+1, most likely not.
+1
+1
+1
Since I lost track of what has been happening i'm just going to +1 what everyone else thinks is a good idea.
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.... You've doomed us all. Granted. Everyone except for traps are executed. Random sci-fi nonsense is required to be taught in schools.
A cute intersex harem with everyone in love with the androgynous king and smart and useful enough into pushing the kingdom forward.

FallacyofUrist

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #132 on: April 29, 2015, 04:41:51 pm »

We built a magic flying machine, then got hijacked and crashed. Now we're being carried by somebody.
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FoU has some twisted role ideas. Screw second-guessing this mechanical garbage spaghetti, I'm basing everything on reads and visible daytime behaviour.

Would you like to play a game of Mafia? The subforum is always open to new players.

Prophet

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #133 on: April 30, 2015, 03:03:49 pm »

OK. Thank you.
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.... You've doomed us all. Granted. Everyone except for traps are executed. Random sci-fi nonsense is required to be taught in schools.
A cute intersex harem with everyone in love with the androgynous king and smart and useful enough into pushing the kingdom forward.

Araph

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Re: [ISG] Teovanth
« Reply #134 on: May 03, 2015, 06:59:48 pm »

"Ugh...

I-I don't know... who are you?"

+1, most likely not.
+1
+1
+1
Since I lost track of what has been happening i'm just going to +1 what everyone else thinks is a good idea.


"Ugh... I-I don't know. Who are you?"

"Alridh."

He crouches down until your feet touch the ground before lowering you off of his shoulder.

"If you don't know, then try."

You gingerly put weight onto your left leg and almost fall over. By leaning heavily on Alridh, you're able to hobble slowly along, though. Nothing seems to be broken, just bruised. You continue along the path, keenly aware that this man tried to kill you less than a day ago.

"So, uh. Where are we going right now?"

"Fremminster."

"...Which is...?"

"Nearest town. Safety."

Well, that's fortunate. You walk in silence for a time. Your leg muscles seem to be less stiff now, and you're able to (mildly painfully) walk on your own.

"What was that thing last night?"

Alridh glances down at you and then back forward at the path. "A child of Maradin." He takes a deep breath and exhales. "A reason to stay behind walls at night."

"And Maradin is..."

"Cat spirit."

"And the whole..." You make a mock ferocious gesture with your hands and fake a snarl. "...crazy berserk thing?"

"A better reason to stay behind walls."

You get the impression that you're not making much progress with this line of questioning.


After half an hour of walking, the town's walls come into sight. Alridh stops walking and faces you.

"This is where we part. Once you're inside the town's walls, seek out Sean Oathend, the chaplain in the Cathedral of Freyen. He'll tend to your wounds and give better answers than mine." He turns back towards the forest.

"Wait, where are you going instead?"

"Back. For my weapons and the corpse. Certain people need to see it." He looks down and then back at you. "Dark things are stirring. Keep your eyes open." He set off at a run and rapidly disappears from sight under the cover of the trees.

After a moment, you turn back towards the town walls and approach the gates. A guard calls down to the gatekeeper to open the massive wooden doors, which slowly creak inwards and grant you entry to Fremminster.


The town is larger than you expected. Pedestrians hurry through the streets and the sounds of civilization echo through the chilly morning air: the murmur of voices, the braying of animals, the clinking of hammers on metal and wood. Soldiers patrol along the walls and a banner you don't recognize - a yellow sword and bow on a green background - hangs from a post near the guard tower.
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